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Jerking Off is Fantastic

by Spurtz

As we all know, masturbation is a great way to relieve stress. And it feels really good. I got to thinking about all the various places I’ve masturbated and thought it was worth reviewing. Maybe bring back some good memories to my readers.

Unfortunately I really can’t remember my very early days of masturbation. At least not the specifics. My guess is that it mostly took place in bed or on the toilet. The toilet would have been preferable due to no mess to clean up and the ability to lock the door. Locking my bedroom door would have raised questions I wouldn’t want to answer.

But jerking off on the toilet had a downside. I had to push my hard cock down at an unnatural angle to shoot my cum into the bowl. And to me, that detracted somewhat from the orgasm. Cumming always feels much better to me when my cock is pointing up. More on that later.

Jacking off in bed was more satisfying although it required clean-up and if I wasn’t careful, the clean-up could involve more than just wiping semen off of my stomach and chest.

Growing up as a pre-teen we lived on a 70-acre tract and as the only boy in the family and no other kids living close by, I spent a lot of time roaming the woods behind my house by myself. Many of those hikes included taking my cock out and jacking off in the woods and watching my cum spurt onto the ground or nearby bushes.

Like all teens in high school, my dick was hard almost all the time in class. I had a couple of pairs of pants that had a hole in the right pocket. I would manage to get my cockhead through that hole and sit in class with my hand in my pocket and massage the head of my prick. One time I went too far and ended up with a load of cum in my pocket. Fortunately it didn’t bleed through the cloth and I managed to do a half-assed clean-up in the boy’s room.

Lots of masturbation occurred when I was fully dressed. If I found myself alone but worried that I might get caught, I would just unzip my pants, take my dick out, and start pounding away. Depending upon where this was taking place, I had to be conscious of where the cum would go. Sometimes into a wad of Kleenex or toilet paper and sometimes just wherever I could shoot it. The biggest concern was getting it on my clothes where my mother might see it when she washed my clothes. That did happen often enough that I’m sure she did see it but she never said anything.

By the time I was 15, while still jacking off every chance I could find, I had also discovered girls. But my sole interest back then was fucking them. Like an idiot, if I was rebuffed, I never even considered the fallback position of a handjob. Dumbass me. So most of my jackoffs were by my own hand and not that of a partner.

As I got older and had more partners, masturbation by a female partner became a part of my regular sexual activity. Lots of variations on the theme occurred. My second wife and I enjoyed the use of an outdoor hot tub. I would put my dick in front of one of the jets and she would do the same with her clit. When I reached the point of no return, I would stand up and she would jump up and jack me off onto the grass around the hot tub. I did not want to ejaculate into the water for obvious reasons. She would let the water jet finish her off.

Another thing she came up with out of the blue, was she managed to get her tongue in my asshole while jacking me off. This was the first time I begin to suspect that she was learning these tricks from another partner. This was before the internet so she didn’t pick it up there. If I had asked her, she likely would have told me that one of her girlfriends told her about it. Possibly that was true.

Another new trick she sprung on me was lubing up my dick with Vaseline. Despite me being in my 30’s, it had never occurred to me to do that. I figured she might have learned that from whoever was fucking her besides me.

While married to my second wife, we lived on a one acre lot that was heavily landscaped. Tons of yardwork was required which I really enjoyed doing. My favorite dress for yardwork was a t-shirt and some cutoff jeans. With no underwear. The jeans were cut quite short and while working in the yard, my cock would manage to work its way down one leg with the head exposed. That would lead to me rubbing the head and getting a full hard-on. Once I was hard, jerking off was the logical next step. I remember the many times I would get my dick out right in my yard and jack off onto the grass. The heavy landscaping kept me from being seen by any neighbors or passers-by. This literally occurred every time I worked in the yard. There was something taboo about it that made it super sexy.

One girl I dated for a while liked to play with my dick while we were driving in the car. The problem with it was a couple of times she went too far and I couldn’t hold back cumming. At the time you don’t give a shit about where the cum is going to go but afterwards, when there’s jism splattered all over your clothes, it becomes a real problem. She always thought it was hilariously funny for me to be covered in cum.

For a couple of years between marriages I had a fuckbuddy who was great fun. Nothing was taboo and she loved to jack me off. She was a hairdresser and would come to my house to cut my hair. When I knew she was coming I would edge for several hours ahead of time so I was primed by the time she got there. I would strip and sit in a chair in my kitchen and she would cut my hair. When she finished I would jack off while she watched. The goal was to see how far I could shoot. She actually got down with a tape measure and measured off a couple of inches short of five feet. On a second similar try I thought I had exceeded that number but another measurement was basically the same. After I came, we would jump in the shower together and by the time we got out, I was primed for more sex which would entail blowjobs and fucking.

One other time we both sitting naked on my balcony. She jacked me off and I shot over the balcony railings. I was on the third floor. I looked down and the first floor condo had a patio and there on the patio was a table with several blobs of semen splattered on it. Luckily nothing ever came of it.

The two of us were in San Jose Del Cabo at the tip of Baja. We had a late dinner and then walked the totally deserted main street of the town. I had to pee really bad and she encouraged me to do it in a doorway. I said I would if she would hold my cock for me. She did and when I finished peeing she started jerking me off and kept it up until I shot a load onto the sidewalk. This was right in the middle of town but it was midnight and we were pretty much on our own.

Then my third wife loved to play with my dick. But she had a thing about not wasting my cum. I had to finish off either down her throat or in her pussy. That was a bit of a setback for me because I’ve always got off on seeing the semen spurt out of my dick. That’s a sight I dearly love. Plenty of women get off on a good cumshot, but not my wife.

So she would give me a great handjob but once I got close, I had to finish off down her throat. Don’t get me wrong. Those were some fabulous orgasms as she sucked the cum out of my dick.

Later in life between marriage number two and three, I got involved with some M2M sessions. Some mutual jackoffs with another guy. Then I promoted several circle jerks with anywhere from four to six guys total. Lots of great jacking off and cum spurting. Even had my then girlfriend join one of the circle jerks and she jerked off all four of us to spurting orgasms. Great fun. One of the circle jerk guys brought his cute girlfriend to a threesome with me. No fucking but she jerked us both off. I loved it when she took some tissues and wiped my dick and chest clean of cum. Very, very hot. I’ve never really understood my reasoning, but getting all the cum cleaned up by my partner is very erotic to me. Holding my dick and wiping the still engorged dripping head clean of cum is the best. Love it.

In recent years with the advent of the internet and endless porn available, most of my jacking takes place in front of the computer in my home office. My office chair sits on one of those large plastic mats and I can just spurt my load right onto the mat for easy cleanup. Again, cock angle has a lot to do with the degree of pleasure achieved through orgasm. If I remain sitting, I have to push my dick down in order to easily shoot onto the plastic mat. So I usually stand up and just bend over. But the process of going from sitting to standing while whacking away, somehow lessens the intensity of the orgasm. The solution is to remain sitting and just not aim my dick at the floor. Unfortunately, the result of that is cum shooting all over my chest and lap. Sometimes I’m in the nude so it would be reasonably OK to do that but most of the time I’m clothed with just my pants pulled down and the result would be sticky semen all over everything.

It’s been years since I’ve jacked off in bed. Occasionally, I will be sitting out on my back patio and get the urge to cum. So I go ahead and jack off and then shoot onto the adjacent plot of grass. I’ve been single for quite some time now, so I can jack off very frequently with no concern of being interrupted. Although I do think one of the gardening crew might have caught a glimpse of me jacking my dick one time. Years ago, in a different house in a different town, the gardening crew was a man and his wife. She clearly saw me jacking off one time and even after I was aware that she saw me, she continued to watch until I shot my load. I was too close to even think about stopping. Then she turned away and went back to work.

Even at a fairly advanced age, I usually jack off twice a day. Sometimes more

Happy jacking, fellow masturbators.


Thirty-Four Boys

Last year was my first year of high school. In my opinion, the school has been over-reacting with political correctness because about seven years ago, a popular boy died of testicular cancer.

Ever since, twice a year, the school has had all the boys get testicle exams.

From practically the first day of school, I heard about these exams in vague ways. I was too shy to ask any questions, but knew with a degree of concern, that the day was coming.

After the first few weeks, the day came. There was no advance warning. Was it like a drug test – where you don’t want to inform the boys so they won’t cheat? Who knows what the powers to be were thinking?

We came into the locker room, and it was noticeably warmer than usual. We were told to take showers first thing, then report back to the benches in the locker room without any clothing. I was disappointed because this was the soccer rotation, and I was getting gypped out of a soccer game. I really like soccer. But I was also scared. Why, I didn’t know. I just was.

It’s not like I hadn’t seen the other boys naked before. The showers are individual stalls, but the locker room is a common area, and you do see guys changing. I didn’t think I was gay or anything, but I did find the other guys dicks and balls ‘interesting.’

So, as instructed, we hit the showers, then came back and sat on the two rows of benches between the lockers. There were 34 of us kids, we were essentially two rows of 17, facing each other – stark naked.

Mrs. Coltone came in. She’s the school nurse. It was very weird sitting there naked like that, and she just stood there and started lecturing us. She told us how terrible STDs are, that we should masturbate because it’s healthy and will keep us out of trouble, she actually stretched a condom on a banana, and then she went into the whole testicle cancer thing, that it can affect boys our age and how we should check ourselves every month.

It was all the sexual stuff I’ve heard before, so I was like tuning it out. My mind wandered, and I found myself kind of staring at the dicks sitting there in front of me. I imagined how it would be if we were all sitting there wanking. Innocent thought, right?

The problem is, I started getting erect. In a moment, despite my best efforts to think about math or something and will it away, there was nothing I could do.

I thought about covering it with my hands, but that would make it even more obvious. I’m sure I must have been blushing, because I could feel the heat in my cheeks. I was so embarrassed! I felt tears welling up, but through sheer determination, I didn’t start crying.

I don’t want to be gay. That whole scene is too problematic. Like in the TV series Glee, when Kirk, the gay kid, gets thrown in a dumpster. But maybe I am? It worries me. That’s why I wanted this published on the Internet. Maybe some people can leave comments and help me straighten out my thinking. It’s been bugging me for nearly a year.

She finished her lecture, and the erection didn’t go away. It was as hard and big as it had ever been. I couldn’t look any of the boys in the eye. I couldn’t look at them at all.

Mrs. Coletone started going down the benches, having each boy in turn spread his legs wide. She then grabbed his balls with her fingertips feeling for lumps. When it was my turn, I duly spread my legs wide, let her reach in, and do her thing.

It only lasted thirty seconds, but my-oh-my, despite my super-embarrassing state, it was the most amazing feeling in the world! Having one’s balls felt up like that – who knew? I started feeling like I was going to cum. Fortunately, she went on to the next kid at that point.

Finally, it was over. To my surprise, no one jeered me. No one whispered and pointed at the boy who had the erection in front of all the other kids. In fact, next period, Jam (short for ‘Jamaica’), one of the coolest kids in the whole school, came up to me and said, “That was really cool. You have a great boner.” I couldn’t even answer. What does one say to something like that? I just shrugged and walked away.

Months later, I found that two or three of the other kids were erect also. I hadn’t been looking at them, for fear of making my situation worse, so I just didn’t know.

I’m rather ashamed to say that when I got home that afternoon, I jerked off and had a super-strong orgasm remembering the day’s event. And the memory has caused many ejaculations since.

The next ball check was scheduled for April, and I feel very lucky that it was canceled due to Covid.

[In a previous confidence coaching session, had mentioned an uncle that he greatly admires who happens to be bisexual. As a reframe, I simply asked, “Do you know anyone who is bisexual?” He lit up, realizing right away that I was inferring there’s an acceptable alternative besides ‘straight’ and ‘gay.’ He asked for your comments in the section below. Please say something, but be kind.]

Sword Swallower

I went to a vaudeville revival convention a few years ago. Dancers, musicians, jugglers, mimes, clowns, ventriloquists, comedians, and others attended. I fancied myself a bit of a magician, but it was more a hobby than a profession.

I didn’t know anyone, and I wasn’t even sure they’d let me in, but they welcomed me with open arms. Four days in, and I felt very accepted. I was becoming one of them, seemingly a big, happy, if somewhat weird international family. Most of the people knew each other from years and years back. They grew up in the business together. They’d meet at various theaters and so on. I noticed they were a very horny, sexual lot. There was frequent innuendo and outright sexual discussion. I gathered a lot of intercourse and other activities went on in the hotel rooms among these people.

So one night, a sword swallower, a guy named Jeremy Blue, was going to do a private show. I was invited, along with like a hundred other people. Everyone was saying that it was going to be a very unusual show, with something more than sword swallowing.

So, we’re all chit-chatting in the audience, when the curtain opens, and out comes Jeremy with a tray of various sword-like things.

True to form, he did some real geeky sword swallowing. Now, I’m not really a fan of such things. It’s not a magic trick. It’s real. Sword swallowers have trained their throats to accept foreign objects, and they really do stick metal things down through their esophagus right into the stomach. The thing that was cool, is this guy had a great onstage personality. He was truly funny. You didn’t have to like sword swallowing to enjoy his show.

Next, he did some things with fire. Putting out balls of fire in his mouth. Spitting flames, juggling three flaming balls.

Then, a hush came over the audience. Many of them evidently knew something I didn’t.

Jeremy started doing a striptease on the stage. I thought it was a joke, but he kept going until he had not a stitch on. Not only that, he was more naked than most, explaining that he didn’t have any hair except on the top of his head because it would interfere with his fire show tricks.

He proceeded to rub fire wands over his stomach, chest, and even his face. I couldn’t help noticing that he was growing an erection during this process. He seemed totally unabashed, like an erection on a stage in front of a hundred cheering performers was normal, an everyday occurrence. I was shocked, but somehow fascinated, maybe even delighted also. Now, I’m not gay, but I do appreciate the human body, whether male or female.

He stopped, lit what looked like a wad of cloth on fire, and held the flames under his balls for a very long time. I don’t know why that didn’t burn him. He put that out, and seemed to be done with fire.

Now, he grabbed one last implement from his tray. It looked like a miniature sword. He handed it to someone in the front row, and it was passed around. I got to touch it for a moment. It was indeed a miniature sword, about fifteen inches long, with an additional six inches of a small handle. The edges were not at all sharp. In fact, it was highly polished stainless steel in a sort of oval shape. Somewhat like the handle of a fork, but tapered toward a dull but pointy end.

The small sword came back to the stage, where Jeremy rubbed it with something. In a moment, the smell wafted from the stage down to us in the audience. It was rubbing alcohol. Then he rubbed it with something else, oil I assume. All the while, it never occurred to me what he might do with such a thing. I was too focused on his ongoing erection, which he had continued to ignore during this whole thing with the little sword. He continued to tell funny jokes. Then, he sat in a chair, and the whole crowd leaned forward to see better. A big TV screen lit up behind him, so we didn’t have to strain to see what he was going to do next.

And what he did, sent me into a masturbation frenzy back in my hotel room right after the show. He slowly stuck that sword into his peehole. Eventually all fifteen inches disappeared into his penis, while he was explaining how it felt going past his two sphincters. Did you know there are two urinary sphincters? I didn’t. One is voluntary, the other involuntary, he explained. He left it in a moment, then started masturbating with it buried all the way to the handle. He announced ‘I’m now orgasming.’ We could all see his muscles throughout his body tensing and we could see his penis and perineal area pulsing on the monitor, but nothing came out. He stayed stationary for a couple of minutes. It seemed to take quite a while for his orgasm to end. Then he slowly withdrew the little sword. When the tip came out of his peehole, it was followed by a couple drops of semen. He put on a robe, accepted his very enthusiastic applause with a big smile, and the curtain closed.

I’m no sword swallower, and I value my life, so I’m not going to experiment with Jeremy’s urethral trick, even though the thought has occurred to me. But I hear the urethra is very prone to infection, as well as physical damage, so I’ll stick with ordinary masturbation – while I replay in my mind what Jeremy did, thank you very much!

Small Cock

Short memoir by a person with a small penis

It was my friend Jason who first told me. I mean wanking with him, it was obvious that his cock was bigger than mine, but I hadn’t given it much thought. I just thought he was extraordinarily large. Then later, my second serious girlfriend, Mattie, confirmed it. Until then, I didn’t realize my cock was smaller than anyone else’s. It turns out I masturbate and fuck just like anyone else. I mean, my orgasms are just like your orgasms. I’m sure every bit as strong. Maybe stronger. The only differences are:

1. When I stroke, it’s usually with my thumb and just one finger. Sometimes two fingers.

2. Mattie told me that she couldn’t really feel my cock in her cunt. In order to give her orgasms, I had to either use my tongue, fingers, or rub my cockhead all externally against her clit. But she also told me that most women aren’t satisfied, I mean orgasmically, with ordinary fucking.

So, maybe around age 19, I figured out that I really do have a small cock. Since I’m otherwise well-proportioned, and I’m told I have a ‘winning’ personality, I’ve not had any more trouble than the next guy making and keeping friends.

However, I do have a high libido. I really like sex, and even more, I have to admit, I just love masturbating with friends, either male or female. That, I can’t get enough of. I really wanted more, since opportunities were few and far between. Then my confidence coach told me to ‘just go for it.’

At first, I didn’t really understand, and I felt too shy, and, well, I’m sure you know. You don’t just walk up to people you barely know, and say, “Hey, wanna fool around?”

Well, it turns out, I found a way in. A sort of secret passage that works every time. It’s no secret really, and I’m sure you ordinary-cocked guys can come up with something similar.

With a new potential friend, I’ll steer the conversation to sexual matters. It doesn’t take much. Most people are secretly thinking ‘sex’ all the time. Often, they bring up something risque first. I just guide the conversation a little bit. I’ll admit that I have a small cock. Then, I steer the conversation a bit more until I can say, “Wanna see how small it is?” Or, “Let’s see how it compares to yours.” What guy can resist that?

Of course, once the cocks are out, it’s not much of a journey to mutual wanking.

With the girls, the conversation can go more like, “Have you ever been with a guy who has a small cock?” Or, “If a guy had a small cock, let’s say, would you be satisfied with what he could do with his fingers and tongue?” Or, better yet, “My cock is small, but a lot of cum spurts out. Want to see?” Oddly, they almost always say “Yes.”

Here’s the bit that I particularly am proud of: Almost everyone I’ve been with says they are particularly attracted to my small penis. So, I keep it hairless to enhance the effect. I think I look like a little kid, but hey, if they like it, it’s OK with me!

Shower Exhibitionist

I saw what you wrote about the guy who had a college roommate who jerked off in front of him all the time. Who is it?

[I’m not going to say.]

Come on, I probably know him. I might have seen him in your waiting room, right?

[You know I can’t reveal that!]

Well anyway, it made me remember a time that I felt the same way. Like, “Oh, if only I was as bold and free as that guy.”

You see, our YMCA is old-school. I mean the shower room isn’t individual stalls the way they are in most modern buildings. We have a large tiled square room with like six shower heads along each wall. You walk up to one, turn it on, and shower in front of all the guys. No big deal right?

But one day, just this one time, there was a guy in there I hadn’t seen before. He was young. My age, maybe 26. He was tall, thin and had longish black hair. Well the thing about him, and he started off normally enough – soaping up his hair, his shoulders, his underarms, working his way down to his feet. Then he rinsed all the soap off. I thought nothing about it, although I glanced over from time to time.

Oh, I’m not gay, or at least not very much, but I do check the guys out, especially the good-looking ones. And, sometimes the older gents. There’s something about a gray-haired man that makes you respect him and want to know him, and something more. He’s kind of attractive in a way. I mean, a little bit.

Well anyway, this young guy finishes rinsing off, and I figured he’d walk right past me to get his towel. I always take a shower head near the entrance, so people have to walk right past me. So maybe I’m a bit more gay than I care to admit. [He laughs.]

But he stayed under the water spray. Then he did the most unexpected thing. He started playing with his cock. Right there in front of everyone. There were about four other guys in the room, plus me, and we all had a clear view of this guy.

Pretty soon he was jerking off in earnest. His penis was fully erect, and after a couple of minutes, he was rocking up on his toes, convulsing – you could see his calf muscles working, and ejaculating into the drain at his feet.

Then, he turned off the shower, walked past me, got his towel and left.

We, me and the other guys in the shower room, we kind of know each other a little bit, and we often have brief conversations in the shower. Not this time. We were shocked. No one said a word.

The guy had made a bit of eye contact with each of us, but nothing more, except when he walked past me, like when he was just three feet (one meter) away, he winked at me and smiled.

I’ve never seen him since. However, for the next several months, I was a very dedicated gym member. I was exercising 4 or 5 times a week. My wife thought my new fitness craze was good for me, but missed my company. I kept hoping to see him again, but nothing.

I have no idea what would have happened had he come back. Would he have repeated the performance? Would I, or anyone else there, copy him? Would we possibly even get more involved? You hear about blowjobs in public showers and all that. But maybe most of all, I’d like to have known his story. Why did he do that? Was he an exhibitionist? Did he think it was normal? Was he making a statement?

I guess I’ll never know. But here’s the thing: I keep thinking someone has to carry on in his tradition. I mean, what if I jerked off in the shower at the Y? Wouldn’t that be a great and interesting thing to do? I’m sure no one would ‘bust’ me or anything. I could just do it, and see what happens. And yet I haven’t, and probably never will.


I’ll admit that I’m a gym rat. Pretty much every day after work, I spend exactly one hour working out. Then I hit the shower, and sometimes the sauna or hot tub. The hot tub is a community hot tub, meaning men and women, so of course you have to wear trunks in there. There are two saunas in the gym, one for men, the other for women.

As is the tradition, men go naked into the sauna, but generally with towels wrapped around their mid section. Most of the guys keep the towels during their time in the steam. A few let the towels fall partially open. I’ve always wondered if some of them are trying to show off a bit. A few others will remove their towels entirely, but that’s rare.

So, one day I was in there, with about five other guys, and a fit-looking older man, one I had never seen before, maybe around 60 or 65 years old was in there. At first I paid him no attention. Then he removed his towel and placed it between his shoulders and the wall. Not a bad idea, since that wall gets a bit too hot, but it’s nice to lean against. That left his genital region exposed, of course. But the thing is, his penis was fully erect. Just standing straight up at attention.

He seemed to pay it no mind. As soon as I saw that, I immediately looked away. I guess I was thinking I didn’t want to embarrass the man by seeming to stare at him. Or, was I more concerned about embarrassing myself by being seen to stare at him? I’m still wondering about that. You see, my brain was juggling a swirl of thoughts at that moment. I thought the idea of a guy with an erection in the sauna was somehow sexy. Now, I’m mostly into women, but I can enjoy seeing a good dick now and then. I think a lot of guys are like that, but they won’t admit it. I mean, to see some porn where a guy with a good firm dick is plunging it into a sexy woman is a real turn on. I think I feel a sort of solidarity with the guy, maybe kind of imagining that’s me.

Anyway, this guy was just sitting there with his erection, seemingly not caring. I wondered what was really going on in his mind? Was he showing off? Was he just being more natural than the rest of us in the room dared? So, another thing I was feeling was a sort of pride for him. Oh, if I only had the balls to just show my erection in the sauna like that, and not care what others think of me.

Another part of me really wanted to join him in his erectness. All I needed to do would be to throw off my towel, too, and let my penis grow. I found it interesting that it wasn’t already erect under the towel. I guess I’ve trained myself not to get erections in situations like this. Back in my high school days, if I had developed an erection in the locker room, I would have been jeered, called ‘gay’ and who knows what. So I think I have learned to stay soft in such circumstances.

While I was thinking all this, the guy actually started to stroke himself, right there in front of five other guys. Imagine that! He was jerking off in the sauna, and we all saw it. I glanced around. Couldn’t help it. I needed to know what was happening with the other guys.

Every one of them was still wearing his towel. They were trying hard not to look at the guy, as if they were trying to give him some privacy or something. Even though most of us knew each other on a gym-acquaintance basis, no one said a word.

The guy kept wanking, and I swear, he seemed to be humming a song, but so quietly, I couldn’t quite tell. It sounded like “Ride Like The Wind” by Christopher Cross. After a minute or two, he arched his back, moaned a bit, and ejaculated into his free hand, which he then rubbed on the towel. A moment later, he wrapped that towel around his mid-section, nodded once and said “Gentlemen” as he stepped out of the sauna. At the last second, he turned at the door, looked right at me, and winked.

My brain raced. Why did he wink at me? ME! What was he saying? And should I be embarrassed? Quite possibly, the other men in the room saw the wink. Would they be thinking about me?

I sat there in the sauna for another few minutes, trying to get my brain back under control. I decided I had to find out more about this guy. So, I stepped out of the sauna and looked for him in the locker room. I figured I could ask him what the wink meant. Was he just acknowledging me? Maybe he was just expressing appreciation for me allowing him to do that without saying anything. Maybe because I was the youngest in the room. Or maybe, just maybe, there was more to it than that. Like, maybe he was inviting me to become his friend. Friend with benefits. There was a part of me that would have really liked that. To have a wank buddy. How cool that would be!

Sadly, I looked around the locker room, but he had already left. I’ve never seen him since. I noticed there was a big motorhome in the parking lot. Might he be a traveler who does that in gyms all around the country? I have jerked off many times thinking about that guy, and he has given me more incentive than ever to go to the gym every night. I almost never miss a few minutes in the sauna now. I’m secretly hoping he’ll come back someday. But more than that, I’m also harboring a secret fantasy. I think someday, I need to become that man. More than once, I’ve been sitting right there in the sauna and thinking to myself that I could throw off my towel and start jerking off right there in front of the other guys. I don’t think I’d get in any sort of legal trouble or anything. But, I’ve never done it, and now I’m actually kind of worried that I never will.

RV Hot Tub Oops

RV Hot Tub Oops

I was at an RV resort with my big old diesel pusher motorhome. I had stayed there for a while, because even though it’s fun driving the thing, packing up everything inside so it doesn’t crash around, unhooking the cables and hoses, then hooking back up and unpacking elsewhere is a big deal, so I didn’t change locations all that often. I had gotten to know people at the RV park, especially the people in the office, pretty well.

They had a public pool and hot tub. Sometimes my wife would join me in the hot tub. Sometimes we’d meet other couples in the hot tub and have great conversations.

One particular evening before dark, it was cold out, so I was the only one who ventured into the tub. There was no one around. I turned on the jets for a while, but it seemed kind of noisy, so I turned them back off to enjoy a nice quiet, warm soak. An important detail is that when the jets are running, the surface of the water is obscured with suds. When off, it’s crystal clear.

I started getting horny. Since no one was around, I eased out of my trunks, and started idly playing with my penis. Pretty soon, I was solidly erect, and wanking pretty vigorously. Now, I wouldn’t cum in the hot tub. That would be gross for anyone who might come in later or the next day.

That’s not a problem for me. I’ve learned to master continuous orgasms without ejaculating, which is great fun. I’ve written that up elsewhere on this website. So there I was dry orgasming away, when I happened to look up. There on a pole, overlooking the hot tub, was a perfectly positioned security camera.

The picture above is the very penis that I’m sure everyone in the office got a good view of.

Roommate in College

Roommate in College Wanking

I was immediately attracted to my first college roommate. Oh, I don’t mean in a sexual way, but this guy was somehow kind of special. He was perhaps 2 inches taller than me, thin, had long wavy hair, but the main thing was his wry smile and a kind of twinkle in his eye. When he’d talk with you, in his usual way of using few words, and mostly asking questions, sometimes quite personal questions, you could swear that he winked at you once or twice.

I knew that even though I’d miss my family, this would be a great year with Kevin as a roommate.

I was honored that he wanted to join me in the cafeteria during our first week. I didn’t know anyone there, and was rather too shy to make friends. We talked about his family and my family. Mostly my family. Every now and then people would come up to him and say ‘Hi Kevin,’ as if they’d known him for ages. How did he do that? They also treated him kind of like a movie star. I mean, he wasn’t famous or anything, he grew up on a farm in a fairly isolated small town, but people acted as if he was someone special.

About the second week, I barged into our dorm room and was immediately, totally embarrassed – for Kevin. There he was, without a stitch of clothing on, sitting sideways in his chair next to his computer, jerking off. I was like, “Oh… um… I’ll come back later…”

As casual as if we were in the cafeteria eating, he said, “Naw Jason, it’s cool. I don’t mind if you’re here.”

I really wanted to leave, but under the circumstances, bolting out of the room seemed even less appropriate than staying. In fact, I was frozen in the doorway, with one hand on the knob, not quite knowing what to do.

He kept jerking off. I saw on his computer a still image of a woman with her ass up in the air. She was wearing a bikini, but it had slipped to one side, partially showing her asshole – definitely pornography.

I don’t know how long it took me to come away from the door. I believe, looking back on that moment, that I had been holding the door open. It was a busy hallway outside. Anyone could have come by and seen Kevin all naked and erect and masturbating like that. Yet, he didn’t seem to care.

Finally, I came in the room, took off my jacket, and sat down at my own desk. I tried to engage in some studying, but couldn’t focus. Every now and then, without trying to seem obvious, I’d turn around a little bit to see Kevin. He was still wanking away. Nothing was said between us.

After a couple of minutes, I quietly heard him say “Mmmm.” I had to glance over, and he was arching his back, kind of pushing his long, hard penis forward, and obviously about to ejaculate.

“Mmm, Oh!” and then, “Jason!”

I looked again. He was cumming into a few sheets of toilet paper. Why he called my name, I didn’t understand for a long time afterward. Today, I realize it wasn’t a sexual thing. He just wanted me to see, the way a kid riding a bike without hands wants you to watch.

In fact, it didn’t seem to be a sexual thing at all with him. Over the next few months, it happened many times. We’d be studying, and he’d go over, lay on his bed, and jerk off. Or he’d do it in his chair. He asked me if I wanted to join in like 20 times.

I always politely declined. It was out of pure shyness. I so, really, totally wanted to jerk off with him! But there was no way I could admit it. Oddly, he seemed fine with that.

Instead, I’d ever so quietly jerk off under my blankets in bed at night, after I figured he had gone to sleep. I always felt so sneaky, like, ‘he’d better be asleep, because I don’t want to be caught.’

The year ended without me ever once being so much as seen naked by Kevin. He was happy as a clam, no matter what. He had lots of friends. I have no idea what his sex life was like. Was he banging some of the girls he hung out with? So far as I know, they never had private time in our little dorm room. Was he gay? Again, I have no idea. He had lots of friends of both sexes.

Even with the crazy jerking off business, I really liked Kevin. I secretly hoped I could get bold enough to wank with him. The more I thought about it, the more I really wanted it, and yet, I could never, ever, bring myself to do it!

To this day, even though I’m well established in a research laboratory, and have done some ground breaking work in pollution eating bacteria, I’m still totally shy. Oh, I can get up in front of 200 colleagues and give a speech. In fact that’s easy. But to talk with a woman, that’s a totally different matter. I finally managed to trap Maggie. She’s the most wonderful woman in the world! Oh, maybe not much to look at, but she is my wife, my companion, and my true, true friend. Of course we’ve had sex. Lots of it! But I’ve never let her see me masturbate. I’ve got to work on that.

Boy’s Guide to Masturbation

This post has been written because you may not have complete and accurate information on sex and masturbation. I hope you find it informative and interesting.

Many still find this subject taboo, something that can’t be spoken or written about, but as you will see, even though you may have hidden yourself under the covers to read this article, it is a subject that is very important to talk about and one that we should believe should be openly discussed.

What You’re Working With

Many boys, as well as grown men and women don’t know the names of all the parts of the penis. The most common parts are labeled in the photo above. You might like to know that the ‘meatus’ is more commonly called the ‘peehole.’ The head of the penis is more accurately called the ‘glans.’ The bottom edge of the glans is called the ‘corona.’ You penis may have more or less foreskin than the one shown.

What is masturbation?

Masturbation, also known as ‘wanking,’ ‘jerking off,’ ‘rubbing one out,’ ‘fapping,’ or a thousand other names, is a way of giving yourself pleasure. Generally, this is done by touching and stimulating your penis, also known as ‘dick,’ or ‘cock.’ Masturbation usually ends with an orgasm. That’s a feeling like none other. It starts with a kind of very pleasurable chill and ends with a delicious pulsating feeling in your penis and lower body.

Why masturbate?

Masturbation has a whole range of mental and physical health benefits as listed on the home page of this website. The biggest reason is probably because it gives you relief from horniness. Horniness is a frustrating sexual desire feeling. Most boys get horny from time to time. Many are horny several times a day.

It will also give you relief from something some boys get that is known as epididymal hypertension or in slang ‘blue balls’, where your testicles become mildly painful.

What’s wrong with masturbation?

Until recently, masturbation was frowned upon by most of society. People almost never talked about masturbation. When it came up at all, it was usually discussed in a negative way. People almost never admitted to jerking off, even though almost everyone did it. Furthermore, parents would get mad at their children if they caught them jerking off, even though the parents did it also.

This strange culture has its roots in religion. Centuries ago, religious leaders realized that the best way to control people is through guilt. What better way to make everyone feel guilty, than to shame them for something practically everyone does? Generation after generation, the shame thickened, until society in general was dead set against masturbation, even though no one knew why. People were against it because their friends and neighbors were against it, because their friends and neighbors were against it, and so on. That’s all they knew.

Fortunately, times are changing. But they haven’t changed all the way yet. You may discover that your parents will be very upset if you are caught masturbating, or even talk about it. You may find your friends make terrible fun of you if you even bring it up.

Now, as millions of people have finally discovered, there’s nothing at all wrong with masturbation!

Who masturbates?

Even though most of them will never talk about it, your friends, your cousins, your brothers and sisters, your teachers, your grandparents, teachers, your minister, your aunts, uncles, even your parents masturbate.

Am I too young to masturbate?

No one is too young, although for boys before a certain age, there isn’t much interest, orgasms may not happen, and ejaculation isn’t yet possible.

Many boys will get an erection when they need to pee due to the pressure on the nerves controlling the bladder. This may mean that they pull at their penises and may also do it when they are nervous, tired, or just in need of emotional support or something to hold on to or to touch. They do feel pleasure from this, but it can’t really be called masturbation.

Can I become too old to masturbate?

I know a guy who is 88 years old and masturbates nearly every day. If anything, masturbation improves with age. Interestingly, people don’t usually stop masturbating when they are married. They do it in addition to or along with sex with their wives.

So, I have decided I want to masturbate, what now?

If you already know how to masturbate, you can skip this section. On the other hand, you may learn something unexpected.

Make sure you have enough time and privacy. Ask your family not to barge into your room or bother you. If you and your family are good at communication, you can actually say something like, “I’m going to masturbate, so please don’t disturb me for a while.” That may not work in your family. You’ll have to judge how open they are to the concept of masturbation.

Perhaps you have already established an arrangement with those at home where they have learned to knock before entering your room. If the door is closed, you knock. Everyone deserves privacy.

Have a nice meal beforehand and go to the bathroom if you feel the need.

Never lock your door. Locking a bedroom door is dangerous for medical and fire reasons. You might enjoy setting the lighting the way you’d like and put on some nice music.

You might like to do this after a bath or shower, so you are clean, refreshed, your hands are warm, and perhaps you are already naked. You can masturbate while clothed or nude. Most people prefer being nude if there is time enough to undress and dress. Some, will simply lower their pants and underwear. Some also enjoy slowly undressing as they become more aroused (excited).

I like to recommend starting with a full body examination and admiration of yourself. It doesn’t matter if you could add or lose some weight, whether you are tall or short, or if your hair isn’t right. This is the time to absolutely enjoy who you are. You might like to look at yourself in a full-length mirror. Notice your chest, your butt, and of course your penis. It is not only OK to touch yourself, it is great. Runs your hands over your sides, your arms, between your legs, over your butt, and just enjoy the sensations.

Your penis may or may not become erect (‘erection,’ ‘boner,’ ‘woodie,’ ‘hardon’) at this point. Either way is fine.

You might get a kick out of very lightly running your fingers over various parts of your body, especially your ass, nipples and your scrotum (‘ballsack’). You may find that touching your nipples gives you an exquisite sensation. Touch these areas very, very lightly for maximum effect. If you have genital hair, touch your scrotum so lightly at first that only the hairs are touched. We think you’ll be surprised by the sensation.

You may also be ticklish. That’s normal, and generally goes away as one gets older. See if you can touch yourself in pleasurable ways that don’t tickle. For you, a heavier touch may be needed in the ticklish places.

Whenever you are ready, you can wrap your fingers around your penis. Then, slowly start moving your hand up and down, so you’re sort of gently stretching the skin along your penis. You may like to let your hand glide over the head of your penis, lightly or firmly and paying attention to the little bit of skin called the ‘frenulum’ directly under your penis head (‘glans’).

Chances are, this will feel very nice. If not, give it time. There’s no hurry, right?

Just keep moving your hand up and down. If you have had any sexy thoughts lately, let your imagine run wild. You may have thought of a girl or boy or man or woman you find particularly attractive. You may have seen someone wearing little or no clothing in a book, on the internet or in person. Picture whatever you’d like in your mind.

Fantasy is a major component in most masturbation. It is OK to fantasize about any safe activity with any person. It may not be at all appropriate to act on those fantasies, but it is totally OK to let your mind wander to sexy situations.

Do your fantasies concern you? For instance, you may find yourself thinking about a boy or man. Interest in men is called ‘homosexuality,’ or ‘gay.’

As it turns out, everyone is on a bisexual spectrum. That means that no one is 100% straight (interested only in women), or gay (interested only in men). Oh, some people are very close to one end of the spectrum or another, and it’s all fine. Our positions on that spectrum can also vary over time.

Chances are, you’ll start to feel something you’ve never felt before. For lack of better words, let’s call it a chill. For most guys, the chill is centered around your genital region. However, it is possible for the chill to be as high up as the top of your head, or as low as your toes.

You may want to speed up your hand movement, so it is going up and down really fast. You can do that if you want.

Some boys become wet at the tip of their penis with a harmless drop or two of a slippery liquid called ‘cowper’s fluid,’ or ‘pre-cum.’ Some guys have a lot of pre-cum, some have little or none, there is no right or wrong amount.

Now, some boys have quit at this point. The feelings scare them, so they stop the stimulation. That’s a shame. They are missing out on something very nice. We urge you to continue and find out what happens. Let the feeling build. Suddenly, the chill may become one of the best feelings you’ve ever had in your life. At the same time, you may feel rhythmic contractions in your penis and the area under your balls. Just let it happen and enjoy. Congratulations, you’ve had your first orgasm!

Depending on your age, thin, clear or white, thick liquid may spurt out of your penis. That’s semen, and you’re ejaculating. The amount may be very little. Young boys start with a single drip of clear semen. Fully mature men can ejaculate anything from a few clear drops to several tablespoons of white semen.

Wasn’t as great as you expected? Sometimes that happens with your first few orgasms. As you become more relaxed, more used to the situation, they can build into something truly fantastic.

Masturbation Variations

Now that you are a wanker (masturbater), you might want to explore some variations.

Perhaps the most common variation is to insert your fingers or an object into your anus. Whatever you use should be smooth and clean. Use some slippery cream or oil if you need additional lubrication. At first, don’t go in too deep, or use something too big around. There’s lots of time for careful exploration of the limits later.

You might prefer to use rubber gloves if you are averse to the possibility of getting some poop on your fingers.

You may find your anus is very tight. This can happen to many guys. The muscles can contract really hard. There is no need to force anything. Use lots of lube, and start with something thin. You don’t want something so thin or pointy that it could injure you, of course. Take your time. Relax. Breathe deep. If you can’t get it in today, you have all the rest of your life to work on it.

Here’s more about anal play: Sex270.com/anal-play.

Avoid anything that’s dangerous such as wood that can splinter, light bulbs that can shatter, and so on. Avoid chemicals such as toothpaste, soap, or anything that can’t be removed. More than one person has been taken to the emergency room because they put something in their ass that they couldn’t get out. It’s terribly embarrassing. Get it? Em-bare-ass-ing.

Another very interesting erogenous area can be your scrotum. Erogenous means a place that if touched can feel sexual. You might start with a very light touch or stroking of your scrotum with your fingertips.

There are a few guys, mostly younger guys, who are flexible enough that they can suck their own penis. You may like to try this, a lot of guys do, but most can’t reach. Some of those guys that try do not end up liking what they are doing, others enjoy it tremendously. In any case, you should never risk hurting yourself in any way trying.

Give your nipples a try. You might think as a guy, your nipples aren’t sensitive like what girls have. Wrong-O. Try very lightly running your fingertips over one of your nipples while masturbating. See if you can tell a difference in the feeling between your right and left nipples.

Many guys enjoy edging. That’s the practice of getting close to orgasm, then stopping before you have to ejaculate. After a minute, you can edge again. Unless you ejaculate, you can stay aroused as long as you want, getting close to orgasm each time.

Going a step further, you can take edging so close to the edge of ejaculating that you’re actually having orgasms, but nothing comes out. You can do it over and over, staying hard and interested for as long as you want. This does take practice. At first, you’ll cum too soon, or you’ll slip off the edge and have to build the feeling up again. Once you’ve had some dry orgasms, your body learns what you want, and it actually becomes easier. Experts don’t need to bring any sort of towels to bed, because they know they’ll have orgasm after orgasm without ever cumming. You can find out more about this and many other techniques at Advanced Male Masturbation.

How often can I masturbate?

You can masturbate several times a day, and in fact most post-adolescent boys and men masturbate on average at least once a day. There is a limit, but it’s hard to reach. One guy told me he ejaculated eleven times in a single day. I knew a fellow who had some swelling in his neck, and it became hard to swallow because some glands had become swollen. He went to a doctor, who told him to keep his masturbation down to once or twice a day. The glands went back to normal size in a week.

What if I don’t masturbate enough?

Masturbation is not required. There are people who never masturbate. They are under the mistaken belief that masturbation is bad or evil in some way. After many days of not masturbating, they will sometimes have ‘wet dreams.’ These are dreams where they have orgasms and ejaculate in their sleep. The dreams that accompany this can be quite vivid.

As the horniness builds up in a person who refuses to masturbate, they can become quite grouchy to their friends and relatives.

Can I masturbate with others?

Yes, you can, but there are some things you might like to know:

Masturbating by yourself is far and away the safest form of sex.

In this era of Covid-19, simply breathing near someone else can be dangerous. Plus, you could catch a cold or the flu without even touching anyone.


If you touch someone, the concern increases. You can end up with jock itch, crabs (little insects that live in body hair and are hard to get rid of), or monkeypox.

If you kiss, or do anything involving contact with the genitals, the danger increases yet again, including rather horrible skin diseases, and herpes, a life-long annoyance.

Finally, if you mix bodily fluids, or have any sort of sexual penetration, the risk is even higher. You could catch AIDS. Contrary to popular belief AIDS isn’t something only passed among gay men. That disease can be contracted by men or women and from men or women.

So, if you can be satisfied with solo masturbation, that’s your best bet. Solo has many advantages. You masturbate when, where and how you want. There is no need to compromise with another person’s desires.

However, if you do want to engage in mutual masturbation, you’re still safer than engaging in other sexual activities.

Mutual masturbation takes many forms, but the most common are:

0. Sharing and comparing. This is not masturbation at all, but you and your friends may like to look at each other naked, noticing penis and scrotum size and shape, ass shape, colorations on the parts of your bodies, and the amount of hair on your bodies.

1. Playing doctor. This is surprisingly common among young children. The adult version is to get naked with a friend or several friends, and pretend you are undergoing a medical exam or procedure that involves the genitals. With the youngsters, playing doctor is not necessarily masturbatory or even sexual. With adults, anything can happen!

2. You and one or more friends are near each other, possibly watching and conversing while each person only touches themselves.

3. You masturbate your friend, and then your friend masturbates you. This way, you each get to enjoy the full feelings of being touched, without having to focus on satisfying the other person at the same time.

4. You get in a position where each is masturbating the other at the same time.

Assuming you have a brother, sister, cousin or friend who is interested, this can be your masturbation partner.

Quite often, mutual masturbation can include mouth-to-genital activities. Typically, this would be sucking on a penis, known as ‘blowjob’ or ‘fellatio,’ or licking a vagina, known as ‘going down on,’ ‘eating out,’ or ‘cunnilingus.’ This is more risky, and I’d really suggest avoiding anything oral. Since you can give and get delightful orgasms strictly with hands, there’s no need for anything more.

Assuming you are under 18 years old, it is a bad idea to masturbate with anyone older than 18 years old. The older person can get in legal trouble for being sexual with an underage person. Furthermore, they can persuade you to do things you’re not ready for. Oddly, sexual activity, even if just mutual masturbation, between someone younger than 18, and someone older, can have unexpected lifelong psychological consequences for the young person.

If someone older wants to masturbate, or do anything sexual with you, and you don’t want it, you are well within your rights to say “No.” If that person bothers you continually, badgers you, tries to blackmail you, or physically forces you to get sexual in any way, that’s rape. Yup, rape can happen to boys, just like it can with girls. If you feel this might happen, let a responsible adult know the details of your concern.

Just to be safe, I’d recommend washing your hands before and after mutual masturbation.

If you’re masturbating with a boy, you can do the same things to him that you enjoy. Make sure your hands are warm, and check whether the other person is ticklish. Otherwise, you may not get the reactions you were hoping for.

Boy's Guide to Masturbation - Mutual masturbation with a boy

If you’re masturbating with a girl, she is likely to enjoy more massage-style action than you might like. You can rub anything from her head to her feet before masturbating her, and she’ll really appreciate it. In fact, if you jump right in and attack her vagina with your fingers, she may not enjoy that at all. Work up slowly.

Girl's Guide to Masturbation - Masturbating a Boy

Once she’s warmed up, she is likely to enjoy gently rubbing her clitoris, a little button between folds of skin near the top of the vagina:

Boy's Guide to Masturbation - mutual masturbation with a girl

Masturbation partners can become insistent. They quite often want to violate common sense and will try to talk you into things you don’t want to do. Let the person know in no uncertain terms, that you don’t want to take that risk, and that if they insist, everything good stops right away. If they don’t stop, it is rape, a very serious legal problem for them.

I shouldn’t even have to mention this, but if you find yourself in a situation where intercourse is going to happen, either having sex with a girl, or anal intercourse with a boy, you’ll want to make sure to use a proper contraceptive. That’s something that will supposedly prevent pregnancy and STDs. Contraceptives are not perfect. They fail all too often.

The most common contraceptive is condoms, also known as ‘rubbers.’ These are thin rubber coverings that you can unroll over your penis. That will (supposedly) keep your semen – containing sperm – within the condom, and not let it into a vagina or anus. It is not much help when it comes to crabs, herpes, and a variety of other diseases.

Girl's Guide to Masturbation, Applying a Condom
Applying a condom

Basically, masturbation, and other things you can do besides intercourse (also known as ‘coitus,’ ‘sexual congress,’ ‘balling,’ ‘banging’ or ‘fucking’), makes a lot more sense, and turns out to be just as enjoyable. Some will say even more enjoyable!

What if I want to masturbate with a guy? Does that make me gay?

Not necessarily. Many men have had man-to-man experiences, yet they end up happily married to a woman. Of course, if you are gay, also known as ‘homosexual,’ that’s become much more acceptable in today’s society. There’s nothing morally wrong with homosexuality. The only problem you may run into is that there are people in our society who are very down on things they don’t understand, and may give you a hard time, even including violence.

What’s the scoop on pornography?

Why do we watch porn?

  • Curious of what others have
  • Curious of what the other sex has
  • What is sex “really” like?
  • It’s exciting
  • We know it is naughty, this turns us on even more
  • Risk of getting caught is exciting even if it is scary
  • Helps me fantasize, turns me on, makes me really horny

Is porn real?

Much of porn is staged, faked. Some is totally real. It is very hard to tell the difference. The bottom line is that it is entertainment. Many of the porn actors are not typical. They may have overly large breasts or dicks, they may shoot out extraordinary amounts of semen, they may have amazing staying power before they orgasm, they may scream and yell and carry on, they may be especially good looking, and so on.

Porn addiction

Masturbation is not usually addictive. Pornography may be addictive. Here’s how you can tell that you’ve become addicted: If your studies or relationships have changed, if you’re doing poorly in school, or don’t have as much time for your friends and family, you may be addicted.

Most addictions are so difficult to overcome that you’ll need professional help. It may be difficult to bring it up with your parents, but that’s the place to start. If you just can’t, then perhaps another responsible adult can help. That could be a trusted teacher, family member, or the parent of one of your friends. Addictions, whether eating disorders, drug use, or sexual disorders are not something to be ashamed of. They happen to millions of people. In fact, you can be very proud that you’re seeking help.

What happens after an orgasm?

A variety of thing can happen. Not all of these will happen to you although some of these may happen sometimes:

1. You may want another orgasm immediately, but your penis softens, and you can’t get it hard again.

2. You may immediately be able to give yourself another orgasm.

3. You may not want an orgasm, or to do anything sexual, for anywhere from a few minutes to many days.

4. You may have mild pain or itching. That will go away soon. If in the very rare circumstance you feel great pain, let your parents know. You may need to see a doctor.

You can be sore because your skin became worn. You might even get blisters. Next time, be gentler and use lube. This usually goes away in a few days.

You may also have a dull ache in your penis. This is caused because your penis isn’t used to being erect and stimulated for such a long time. The problem goes away after a year or two. In the meantime, try to masturbation for shorter periods of time.

5. You may feel guilty. This is unfortunately common. It’s due to the influence on you from all the old-school misinformation still hanging around that masturbation is supposedly bad.

6. You may feel weak or tired. This can happen after your first orgasms. If it happens later on, you might want to look at other lifestyle issues. Perhaps you’re stressed, not getting enough sleep, or not eating a fully nutritious diet.

7. You can feel tired and completely spent, your head unable to think of or do something properly for a while, this is totally normal. A lot of guys will have a nap after masturbating.

What if something isn’t quite right?

As human beings, we tend to worry about things. 99% of the things we worry about turn out to be nothing. Sexual matters tend to be worse, because we are reluctant to discuss them with our parents, doctors, or any other adult.

If you have a concern, communication is the best approach. Most of the time, when you express your worry to an adult, they can put your worries to bed. For instance, when I was around 8 years old, I got the idea to put some tape around my penis just below the glans. The tape stuck really well. I couldn’t get it off and became really worried. I went to my father. He didn’t yell. He didn’t laugh. Instead, he put some lighter fluid on the tape, which weakened the glue, and was able to remove the tape easily. Worry gone! You may have other concerns, perhaps a discharge, an itch, or a concern that you have caused damage due to an unusual masturbation technique.

What if I need to see a doctor?

Girl's Guide to Masturbation - Medical Issues

Doctors are there to help you, not to hurt you.

They see penises, scrotums, and anuses every single day, they will not have any sexual charge, or any concern about seeing yours. They will maintain your privacy while being examined. Only the doctor, possibly an adult chaperone, and anyone who you specifically allow will be present while you’re examined. Normally, after puberty, your parents are not allowed to be in the exam room, unless you give your permission.

Doctors cannot tell, and don’t care if you have masturbated. Well, there is one exception. If you masturbated shortly before visiting the doctor, he may see semen oozing out of your peehole. Still, to the doctor, that’s no big deal. It’s like looking in your ear. There may or may not be earwax.

Doctors masturbate as well.

We mentioned misinformation once or twice. Here are some common misbeliefs:

  • I will lose my eyesight.
  • God will chop my hands off.
  • Masturbation makes me bald, sick, hair on my palms.
  • Bad for my health.
  • Stunts my growth.
  • Stops my penis from growing to full size.
  • My penis will wither or fall off.
  • Affects puberty.
  • My parents can smell if I have masturbated.

What is going on inside me?

Let’s start with a fun little anatomy lesson. Take a good look between your legs. Don’t be scared. You are not doing anything wrong, and you should not feel dirty. Try and relax as best you can. The area between your legs is your external genitalia consisting primarily of your testicles and penis, also known as ‘cock’ or ‘dick’ and ‘balls.’ The testicles are glands that make sperm, which are millions of microscopic, little cells that can mate with an egg in a woman and make her pregnant. When we ejaculate, also known as ‘cumming,’ which we’ll talk about shortly, your sperm are mixed with a liquid called semen from the prostate gland. The semen flows though the same tube in your penis that urine (pee) flows through. It’s called the ‘urethra.’

Here’s how all that stuff is arranged inside:

Boy's Masturbation Guide - male anatomy

So, ejaculating, or cumming, is the process of squirting out semen. The original purpose was to make women pregnant for the continuation of humankind. In order to encourage men to do that, the process feels very nice – very enjoyable! However, the opportunity to have intercourse with a woman, to put your penis in her, does not come along often, so as luck would have it, you get to enjoy the same feeling all by yourself. This process of making yourself ejaculate is called ‘masturbation.’ Masturbation doesn’t always have to end in ejaculation. Masturbation includes pretty much anything that makes you feel good in a sexual way.

I don’t look the same ‘down there’ as other boys or men. What’s up with that?

Not all boys are created equal. Some have large penises, some have small ones. Some have light ones, some are dark. The good news is that no matter what kind of penis you have, the feelings are just the same.

As you can see in the pictures, each person’s penis can be quite different than others.

Some people put great importance on penis size. That’s actually crazy but you may run into it from time to time. Generally, men assume women are more attracted to large penises. When you ask the women, however, most will say the size doesn’t matter at all. Instead, they’re much more interested in men with good personalities.

Depending on your age, you may or may not have hair in your genital region. Your penis and testicles may be small or large.

Something else you may notice is that some guys have foreskins, and some do not.

Boy's Guide to Masturbation - Circumcision

We are all born with foreskins. However, another weirdness in our society that we are slowly outgrowing is called ‘circumcision.’ This is a procedure in which the excess skin at the end of the penis is cut off. This is usually done when a baby is only a few days old. Some time, way in the past, it was assumed that a man could not keep an uncircumcised penis clean, and that circumcision eliminated that problem. However, like so many traditions, it lives on with no purpose. Many scientific studies have shown that an uncircumsized penis is just fine. In fact, there are complications with circumcision.

In a few unfortunate cases, after circumcision, an infection can begin. In very severe and extremely rare cases, the penis has to be amputated, or the baby may actually lose his life.

Perhaps even more tragically, doctors until as late as the 1980s had this crazy assumption that babies don’t feel pain. So they cut off their foreskins without anesthesia. I guess the babies just screamed and cried during the procedure because that’s what babies do, right?

Even with anesthesia, there’s a multi-day healing process, in which anything touching the area of the circumcision would be quite painful. I don’t think a baby could enjoy having a urine-soaked diaper touching his wound.

Sometimes uncircumcised boys survive all the way to adolescence or even adulthood before they get circumcised. The usual reason is what’s called ‘phimosis.’ This is a rather common condition in which the opening at the end of the foreskin is too tight. The foreskin cannot be slid back exposing the head of the penis (called the ‘glans.’) This can cause masturbation or intercourse to be painful, or even impossible. The end of the foreskin with phimosis can also become irritated or even infected.

How can you tell if you’ve been circumcised? Most circumcised men will have a brownish scar all the way around their penis usually about one centimeter (1/2-inch) behind the glans.

Circumcision Scar

What if you have phimosis? Does it hurt to masturbate? Can you not see your entire glans? Well, there’s good news. First, you probably won’t need a circumcision. You can do exercises that will eventually make it possible to pull your foreskin all the way back. More good news: You have to be erect to do these exercises, and they can be like masturbating – lots of fun!

There is also a simpler procedure than circumcision. Instead of cutting a ring of foreskin all the way off, it is slit along the top. This is called “dorsal slit.’ Once that heals, you can pull the foreskin back just fine.

Most men and women have at least some degree of body dysmorphia. That’s where you don’t think you look good. This can be nearly crippling for many people. Interestingly, some of the best looking people think they look terrible. Chances are you are much better looking than you realize.

Pornography can give guys a real complex about the size of their penis. In porn, when someone talks about penis size, they usually say their penis is anywhere from 7 to 9 inches (17 to 23 centimeters) long when erect. Those are almost always exaggerations. In the real world, the average erect penis is 5-1/2 inches (14 cm) and many are much smaller. Contrary to popular belief, women almost never turn a man down due to the size of his penis. If they’re going to dislike a guy, its because of his personality. If you tease your girl, make her do things she doesn’t want, take advantage of her, or worst of all, don’t really listen to her, she’ll find someone else, and it won’t matter about the size of his dick.

Are there unsafe masturbation practices?

Yes, totally.

  • Your urethra (peehole) is very susceptible to infection. It is best not to stick anything into the urethra. If you must do so, make sure the object is sterile and smooth. The urethral walls can tear easily, and bleed profusely.
  • It is possible to put something in your anus that you can’t remove. Things with sharp edges are especially problematic for obvious reasons. If you must put big things in, make sure a string is firmly attached so you can pull it back out. Better yet, don’t put big things in there.
  • Any sort of exchange of bodily fluids with another person could cause you a lifetime of illness.
  • There is no need to combine masturbation with use of drugs, alcohol, or dangerous practices such as cutting. Masturbation by itself is totally enjoyable.
  • When it comes to mutual masturbation or other forms of two-person sex, be very careful who you associate with. Some people are terribly abusive.
  • Keep your masturbation private. In the heat of the moment, you may let someone participate who will blab all over town, or worse, post your pictures or video on the Internet. You can never undo that.

So, what are some safe masturbation practices?

  • Add peeing into your masturbation practice. Playing with peeing is often called ‘watersports.’
  • Masturbate outdoors in a safe and secluded space.
  • Lay on one or more pillows, and rub against them, called pillow humping.
  • Edging. This is the idea of getting close to orgasm but putting it off for as long as you can.
  • Masturbate on webcam, but only with a trusted friend. Do not keep recordings of your masturbatory times.
  • Expand your fantasy life while masturbating.
  • Medibation is the combination of meditation and masturbation. It can take any form you wish from mindful masturbation, to letting your mind be as clear as you can while masturbating.
  • It is possible to read, listen to music, watch videos, and even study while masturbating.

An Extremely Enjoyable Homework Assignment for Men

I’d like to propose the following homework assignment.

You can complete this assignment by yourself, or with friends, family, or coworkers, assuming they’re onboard.

OK, here’s your assignment:

1. Get naked and comfortable in your usual way.

2. Start masturbating.

3. Your objective is to release a single drop of cum.

4. You may not believe that it is possible. You may wonder exactly how to accomplish that.

Here’s what you do: Bring yourself close to orgasm, but stop before you ejaculate. Don’t stop for long. Take only a second or two before you resume stimulation. Stop, or maybe even just slow down as often as you need.

5. As you practice, you may start feeling a sort of chill, or springiness happening in your body, which you’ve experienced before as an early stage of orgasm. Focus on that, and let it build. It can become super-strong. Pretty soon, you’ll notice that you’re actually orgasming, but nothing is coming out. Furthermore, you stay aroused and erect, and you can maintain that orgasm continuously, or have it go away and come back numerous times.

6. It takes real skill to go one level deeper, and release a single drop of cum, so you probably won’t succeed on your first attempt. You may have to practice this many times before you have a breakthrough.

7. Don’t be surprised if in your early sessions, you fall away from orgasming and have to build up again several times, or go over the edge with a full ejaculation.

8. After the first time you release a single drop of semen, your body seems to understand what you want to accomplish, and it becomes easier. It is not uncommon for an expert, someone with years of practice, to release a drop every few minutes, three or four times. At the end he may be satisfied with never having fully ejaculated, or he may prefer to end his sessions with a crashing ejaculation.

A variation that is somewhat easier to accomplish, and probably just as nice overall, is to give yourself continuous dry orgasms. Everything is the same, but your goal is not to produce drops of semen, but to have orgasms complete with urethral contractions, in which nothing comes out.

You may feel that this is fiction. Let me assure you that although it is an uncommon practice, I, and thousands of other guys have actually learned to have continuous one-drop or dry orgasms.

Once you master the technique, you can discuss it, maybe even demonstrate it to other people, and you’ll be promoting the many physical and mental health benefits of masturbation.

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