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Caught With a Sex Toy

I’m a retired guy and since I don’t cook, I eat out frequently. I have a favorite place for dinner that I try to hit a couple of times a week. I always ask for the same waitress named Beka and we have become good friends. She’s probably about twenty-five so it will never be more than just friends due to a huge age difference, but that’s ok. She’s fun to talk to.

She is going to the local community college and is studying interior design and works at the restaurant at night to make some extra money. OK, it’s a Hooters, so you know Beka is good looking with a nice rack.

Anyway, when I found out she was studying interior design, I told her that my house had been done by a professional interior designer and she might like to see it. No ulterior motives. I just like having good looking girls around. I also like showing off my house. She was more than enthusiastic and said she had a day off over the weekend and could stop by.

So about 2 pm on Saturday my doorbell rings and there’s Beka, looking very cute in a short dress that showed off her great legs. I started a tour and she was very impressed. We discussed some of the designer chairs I had and she was most interested in a large area rug that I had bought in Copenhagen. I also have a lot of original art and she commented on how well the art coordinated with everything else.

My office was the last room I showed her. As she walked over to my desk, she asked, “What’s that?” I looked where she was pointing and the blood drained out of my face. I’ve never been more embarrassed in my life. Laying on my desk was an Acmejoy masturbation toy that I had plugged in to charge up and totally forgot about it. Busted!

It was fairly obvious what it was so I decided to man up and admit to the truth. “That’s uh, er, a masturbation toy. At my age that’s about all the sex I can get. It’s better than just doing it by hand.”

“So how does it work?” she asked. “And why is it better than your hand?”

Obviously she wasn’t too put off about the fact it was a sex toy. But I guess she knew she had nothing to fear from me.

“Well, to get the best result, I lube up my erect, uh…penis and stick it in that silicone sleeve. You can see all the bumps and ridges inside that massages my, uh, dick. It has two controls. Those two glowing blue buttons. One controls the degree of vibration. The damn thing actually has 10 different levels of vibration. Then the second button makes that silicone sleeve rotate. And there are five different rotation speeds.”

She took the toy from me and inserted her fingers inside the silicone sleeve. “Hmmm, I can see where that might feel good rubbing on your, uh, thing,” she commented.

“Hmmm….that sounds really interesting,” she said. “Can you give me a demonstration of how it works?”

“You mean on my penis?” I was totally shocked by this request. But also turned on.

“Of course on your penis, silly. I’ve seen a penis before but I would really like to see the toy do its thing. You do want to show me, don’t you? I thought guys like to show off their manhood.”

“Well, it’s a little odd. You being fully dressed and me having to expose myself to you,” I said.

“I hope you are not suggesting I get undressed are you?” she replied.

“No, no, nothing like that. It’s just awkward. I’m not used to baring my all to young girls. But I’m willing to give it a try. How much time do you have?” I asked her.

“A couple of hours,” she replied. “Why? Does it take a long time?”

“No, not long at all. But it would be better if I took a Viagra. And that takes about 30 minutes to start working. At my age I need some help.”

“Go ahead. Got anything to drink while we’re waiting?” I popped a 100mg Viagra and mixed her a quick drink and one for myself. We made small talk until I figured I’d had enough time for the little blue pill to do it’s thing.

“Look Beka, it’s best that I take off my pants and sit on a towel. For the device to really be effective I need to put quite a bit of lube on it and it can be messy.”

“Go for it buster,” she replied.

I kicked off my shoes and slipped off my pants and underwear. My dick was already about half hard just from thinking what I was about to do. Beka looked intensely at my dick and said, “Nice cock for an old dude. I’ve never seen and old cock before but they look just like a young one.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that.” I spread a large towel on my office chair and sat down with my dick now sticking straight up. I generously lubed up my cock with some K-Y. Cocks always look more inviting when coated with lubricant and I could tell Beka was enjoying the show. I took way more time than necessary spreading the K-Y all over my dick. I always enjoyed showing off my cock to the ladies. Then I slowly stroked my dick to get it fully hard.

Beka dropped to her knees by my side. I guess to get a closer look. “Don’t mind me,” she said. “I just want to really see this thing work.”

Then I grasped the toy by the handle and slid the silicone sleeve down over my cock. Each time I press the vibration button it steps up the degree of vibration. I pressed it about four or five times which provided a nice buzz on my cock. Then I pressed the rotation button about three times and the sleeve began to rotate. The feeling was about ten times better than what I could do with my hand.

Beka’s eyes were glued to my cock and the toy. I was loving it. Both what the toy was doing to my dick and the fact that a pretty young girl was entranced with the sight of my cock being masturbated just a couple of feet from her.

“Dude,” said Beka, “I have to tell you that sex with an old guy like you has no interest for me. But seeing your rock hard cock all covered in lube sliding in and out of that toy has really got me hot.”

“I have to warn you but when my orgasm comes, which will happen almost too quickly, I’m going to really make some noise and my body will go into spasms as the cum ejects from my cock into the toy.”

“Sounds fine to me,” she replied, obviously enjoying my performance.

I held the toy and moved it up and down the length of my cock. Beka didn’t take her eyes off of my actions. The sleeve was somewhat transparent and the redness of my cockhead and shaft could be seen inside it. I always wished it would take longer to cum using the toy. I could draw it out a bit by just holding the toy stationary and not moving it up and down my cock but it felt so good moving, it was hard not to do it.

As I stroked the toy up and down my cock, the silicone sleeve was madly rotating and stimulating the shit out of my dick. Every so often I would pull it completely off my cock so Beka could get a good look at it. My damn prick was bright red from all the stimulation.

“Wow,” exclaimed Beka, “that dick of yours is hard as a rock. Not bad for an old dude. I like the shiny cockhead too.”

I had discovered that tilting the toy towards me put extra pressure on my frenulum as the silicone sleeve whirled around and massaged my dick. That put me over the edge.

Then my orgasm came on very quickly. I started groaning as my body writhed in ecstasy. Then I started panting and when the first shot of semen spurted out, I let out a small scream. I bucked and screamed as spurt after spurt rocketed from my dick. Finally it was over and I had to quickly pull off the toy because the sensitivity of my dick was off the charts. I sat there exhausted as strings of semen drooled out of my cock as the major part of my load dripped out of the toy.

Beka clapped and said, “Wow, that was fantastic. The only thing that would have made it better would have been to see the actual ejaculation shoot out. I really love the way your dick looks, all red and shiny. Definitely made me wet.”

“Yep,” I replied, “I like seeing the cumshot as well. I’m happy to hear my dick got you wet.”

“Maybe we can have another session where that can be arranged. Seeing the cum shoot,” she said with a sly grin on her face. Hearing that, my cock twitched and another small jet of semen squirted out.


Create Your Own Story

Hi Folks! Jeremy and I would love to hear your stories. Please write a story in the comment area below, or you can send direct to me using jenelle@sex270.com.

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My Sister and Her Friends Had a Most Incredible Request

My twin sister Junie, and her two friends came to my bedroom door all giggly, as usual. They had a request, and it couldn’t have been stranger if they asked me to reverse the earth’s poles.

They unraveled their request slowly, all hesitant, shy, and goofy. At first I thought I understood, but when they got to the heart of the matter, I couldn't believe what I was hearing, and I was immediately embarrassed.

It seems the three girls were teamed up in biology class to do a simple little project. They were to bring in something to examine under a microscope.

I figured they wanted me to pull the wings off a bug or something. Cool, I could do that. But why all the giggles?

"No," Junie said, seemingly almost frustrated by my lack of understanding. "Not a bug. We need some sperm."

I couldn't even think of an answer, while I'm sure my face turned beet red. My first impulse was to slam the bedroom door on the three of them and yell 'Fuck off.' I mean, the whole notion was way too embarrassing.

On the other hand, at 16, my hormones were always raging. I had not yet even seen a real live vagina. Well, maybe Junie when we were four or five years old, but that didn't count. I started to mull the possibilities over in my head. I came to realize it would be pretty cool. I could jerk off, hand them a little bottle of sperm, and they'd know I did it, and they'd have a sort of souvenir. On yet another hand, that would be admitting that I masturbated, something that just wasn't done among people our age back then. But what if? What if I did that for them? Wouldn't it be the coolest thing in the world to provide them a sperm sample? I started to cave in, the hormones in me were winning over my cautious intelligence.

"OK," I said in a strange voice. I sounded a bit too high-pitched, and kind of shaky. Weird. I repeated in a stronger voice, "OK, sure, since you're my sister, and since you girls need it for school. Just don't tell anyone where it came from, alright?"

Suddenly, I regretted saying that I would do it. I hadn't thought it through, but if they had sperm in their biology class, they'd pretty surely tell everyone where it came from. My face got redder thinking about everyone in the school knowing I jerked off, and by gosh, maybe they'd make mental pictures of me jerking off. How embarrassing! I could feel the heat in my cheeks.

"I changed my mind," I said, somewhat more forcefully than I intended, trying to keep my voice from going high and shaky again.

"Oh, come on. It's for science," Kathy cajoled.

We went back and forth a bit, me and the three girls, but finally after they promised profusely that they wouldn't reveal the source, I did relent. Hormones again.

I had an empty bottle from an old chemistry set in my room. I started to close the door telling them I'd fill the bottle and give it to them in a little while.

"No, we need to watch," Junie stated.

"Yeah, yeah," the other two girls chimed in.


"Because…. um, because we need to know that it's real sperm, not something fake you could put in the bottle."

You'd think I'd object to that, but I immediately pictured, well, I don't know what exactly, something about the three girls all naked, and me naked, and maybe getting a handjob or a blowjob or something, especially from Kathy. Or the other girl, Nicole, for that matter. Nikky was a supe-hot looking girl with Korean parents. She didn't even realize how incredibly sexy she was with that super-long straight black hair of hers. My imagining was all quite nebulous, but it was a strongly sexual notion. I could feel a stirring in my pants.

I pretended to object, and be all sheepish, but I was all set for whatever might happen next. And yet, I didn't make any move. What should I do, just whip my pants off in front of these girls? That would be inelegant, to say the least. Maybe somehow tell them they had to get naked first? Sure, but how, exactly, would I justify that?

I won't bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that I ended up totally naked in front of them, and none of the three girls removed a stitch. I think in retrospect, I didn't need to remove my T-shirt, but it seemed appropriate at the time, so I was, in fact, fully naked.

My penis was immediately hard and I felt many things at once: I was feeling a sort of shame, like I was doing something wrong. I had to remind myself it was 'for science.' I felt sexually excited, of course. And, I felt proud. My dick had only recently come into its full size, and I had a nice nest of black hair around my balls with a slight trail leading up toward my belly button. And, I have to admit, my body, although perhaps a bit slim, was pretty athletic.

"That's it?" Kathy asked. "I thought your penis would be bigger."

That set me back for a second, but Junie stepped right up to the plate and said, "It seems huge to me." The world was right again:)

"Come on, masturbate," Nicole commanded. I was surprised she even knew the word.

So I did. I started to pull my foreskin up and down and all too soon, I was saying, "I'm gonna cum, I'm gunna cum."

My sister grabbed the little bottle, and held it near the tip of my dick. I was out of control, and started spurting. She only got a couple of drops in the bottle. The rest landed on the floor. And it was much more cum than usual.

It was probably the strongest orgasm of my life. My knees were so weak I had to sit down on the edge of my bed. The girls had been dead silent during the procedure. Kathy broke the silence saying, "That's it? I thought there'd be a lot more sperm than that." I decided right then that I didn't really like Kathy all that much, but mostly, I was in the combination of the afterglow of a super orgasm, and at the same time, I was becoming very, very shy. No, more than shy. Concerned that I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have been naked and jerked off in front of the girls.

As soon as I could, I put on my pants, and politely shooed the the girls, with their little bottle, out of my room.

It took me several days to recover. I jerked off several times reliving the experience. But I also had several bouts of absolute fear, like I burned down a house or something. I was sure the whole school would be talking about me.

Nothing happened, and so after a week, it was entirely forgotten.

Then, a knock at my bedroom door. I could tell it was the three of them again. I could hear them tittering.

"What?" I asked as I opened the door.

"The sample didn't work," Junie said. "By the time we got to school, it was kind of melted or something. We couldn't see any sperm in it. We need another sample. This time we'll refrigerate it."

Sometimes I'm very proud of my quick mind. I answered, "Not unless you girls participate also."

Naked at the Creek

Our house had a long back yard and at the end of the yard is a public creek covered with a canopy of shade trees. I have a little clearing along the bank where I placed a lounge chair years ago. I take my laptop down there to work sometimes. It is just within the range of my WiFi.

After a while, I got bolder. On a hot day, I’d take off my clothes and lay on a towel on the chair as I worked. It was a bit risky, because being a public creek, there was a possibility someone may come along in a kayak, or float on a rubber thingie, or maybe just wade down the creek. No one ever did, though. I figured if someone came along, I’d hear them in time.

One day, being all naked like that, I diverged myself from my work and was reading some sexual stories on my laptop. I had grown a big erection that I was ignoring at the moment, but figured I’d get around to stroking in a while.

Suddenly, I heard some light crashing through the leaves. I jumped up, almost dropping the laptop, and wrapped the towel around myself so quickly, I got a temporary crick in my back muscles. It was just a pair of deer browsing berries along the bank of the creek. Whew!

A couple of weeks later, I was down at the creek, had read some sex stories, and was now wanking in earnest, getting ready to drop some semen onto the creek bank when I heard some more light crashing. Again, I quickly grabbed the towel and wrapped it around myself. This time, it wasn’t deer, it was a boy, perhaps 14 years old, shirtless, walking along the edge of the creek. He said “Hi” probably having no idea what he had almost seen.

I said “Hi” trying to remain cool, like he almost didn’t catch me wanking there. He walked on. When he was out of site, I removed the towel, and tried to get hard again and jerk off. It wasn’t happening. I had visions of him telling his parents there was a ‘perv guy’ down there at the creek jerking off. Of course he had probably seen nothing, but I wasn’t sure of that. He may not have cared. I wasn’t sure of that either.

It took me a couple of weeks before I started feeling good about jerking off at the creek again, but finally, I had re-acquired the sense of privacy I needed, and was able to wank at the creek almost daily. I have never been disturbed there again, even by deer.

My Problem

My Problem, an interesting masturbation situation

My problem is on a higher level, and I say this with an unconcealed degree of pride.

I have learned to have continuous, long-lasting orgasms. I can go as long as 5 minutes in orgasm.

In case you’re wondering how it’s done, let me tell you, because you can learn it too, and it’s not hard. It just takes some practice, and not even that much. I have seen a couple of guys get it on the first try.

You may know about edging, where you bring yourself close to ejaculating over and over again, but before you get too close, you stop the stimulation, and let the feeling subside.

OK, do that. Except, every time you get close to the edge, stop the stimulation only for a moment, Maybe one or two seconds. Then resume. Optionally, you can reduce the stimulation without stopping altogether. The goal is not to let the pre-orgasmic feeling fully subside. Just let it fall enough that you don’t cum then and there.

Stay calm, and keep doing it, Pretty soon, a true orgasmic feeling, what I call ‘lower orgasm,’ will happen for a moment. You feel that wonderful visceral tickle, for lack of a better word. You feel the tightness in your genital region, and probably a super excited, super hard cock state. You may feel tingles, or sort of spectacular chills as distal as your head and feet. You are fully in bliss. Now, typically, it falls off after a moment, or you ejaculate. That’s where the practice comes in. You can find the balance and stay in the lower orgasmic feeling for longer and longer times. At first, it’s up and down. You’ll keep getting into the orgasmic state for a moment, then it will recede, then you can bring it back, and so on. But in time, you can just stay in it.

Your body helps out. When it learns what you’re trying to do, it actually supports you in this activity, making it increasingly easy to stay in the state. Maybe it’s like playing the piano. It’s pretty damn hard to play a tune the first few times through, but with practice, you don’t even remember to press certain keys, you just play the song almost on autopilot.

Once you get the knack of it, you can even hit what I refer to as ‘high orgasm.’ In that state, your penis pulses. You get the ejaculatory contractions, but nothing comes out. That’s ideal. In actual practice, sometimes one drop of cum will escape. That’s rather exciting, because you can have a session of mini-ejaculations over the course of minutes or even hours. As good as that is, to get into the high orgasmic state with contractions and all, but stay dry… well, it’s an absolutely delicious accomplishment.

Imagine: You can have orgasms better and beyond what almost any other guy has had. But you don’t have to imagine. This is real!

So my problem, on a higher level, is that I’m still not perfect. Whether by myself, or with my wife or male friends doing me, it’s difficult for me to stay in lower orgasm for more than a few minutes at a time. And my high orgasm state generally falls back to lower orgasm after a few seconds, and has to be brought back, over and over again. On some occasions, I’ve had five minutes of lower and higher orgasm several times in an hour or more, But usually, I blow it, and fully ejaculate too soon.

By the way, an interesting side benefit is you learn that you don’t have to ejaculate to be satisfied. Many times, I’ve received a dry handjob from my wife, then continued to rub myself for an hour next to her while she sleeps. I don’t even bring tissues to bed any more, because I don’t need them. Finally, I fall asleep, happy as a clam. On a few occasions, I have fallen asleep while she is manipulating my penis. My wife seems to particularly like that.

As I keep practicing, I’m very curious to see what will happen next. Will I be able to stay in higher orgasm for a half-hour non-stop? What will that be like? Is there something new, as yet undiscovered? Maybe, I’ll break through to a new threshold? Is there a state beyond orgasm?

The Early Days

By Spurtz

How I learned to jerk off

How I learned to jack off

I learned how to masturbate strictly by accident. Although I can’t remember exactly how old I was, I’m guessing I was about 10 or 11.

When class at school let out for recess, we would all go out to the school playground. There was a large swing set that was supported by metal poles in an “A” shape. The poles were about four inches in diameter. Some of the boys, including me, would wrap our legs around the poles and climb up while the girls were in the swings. I noticed that it felt good for my penis to rub against the pole. I learned that the trick was to hunch up the pole a couple of inches and then slide back and inch or so. This felt incredibly good. After hunching up and sliding back a number of times, I achieved orgasm. And that produced the best feeling in the world.

Of course it was a dry orgasm but what a wonderful feeling. In my kid brain I thought I had discovered something that no one else knew about. I was hooked. I did it every single recess. Surely the teacher knew what I was doing. In retrospect it had to be extremely obvious I was jerking off.

Then disaster struck. I hunched the pole and had an orgasm but also felt pain in my penis. I slipped my hand down my pants and felt wetness. No, I hadn’t cum. This wetness was blood. My hunching friction had torn my foreskin.

I only lived a few blocks from the school. I told the teacher I had an emergency and had to run home for a few minutes and took off. Both my parents worked so no one was home. Thankfully my dick had stopped bleeding by the time I got home but my Jockey shorts were soaked in blood. Miraculously, none had soaked through my pants. I cleaned myself up and threw away my bloody shorts and went back to school. The teacher never asked any questions thankfully. That curtailed my masturbation for a few weeks.

Amazingly, I didn’t figure out that I could duplicate the swing set pole activity by jerking my dick off with my fingers. That came a bit later. My best bud at the time was another kid my age named Denny. As class let out one day, an older kid who was probably 13 , told Denny and me that he had something to show us. He led us back into some bushes where he unzipped his pants and took out his erect penis. He invited us to both to do the same but we were too shy. He proceeded to jack off in front of us and very quickly produced several squirts of semen. I really can’t recall if I was aware that semen could be produced by jerking a dick, but in any case it was quite an eye-opener. I learned then that orgasms could be achieved by hand.

Now that I knew I could jack myself off with my own hand, that became a daily activity. And at some point I produced some semen. I also had regular wet dreams that were quite pleasurable, but messy.

My family lived on a large wooded 40-acre tract. The back of our property butted against Fort Belvoir and extensive training exercises took place in those woods. I used to prowl those woods and one on of my trips I ran across a group of wooden benches. It may have been a resting point for soldiers training in the woods. One of the benches had an incredibly detailed pencil drawing of a couple fucking. While I was vaguely aware that a man put his penis inside a woman’s pussy, I thought once the insertion was made, the two just lay together. Somehow I hadn’t connected the jerking of my cock with movement inside the woman’s pussy. But the drawing made it very clear with a series of motion lines behind the guy’s butt showing that thrusting was occurring. Then a light bulb went off over my head and I realized what actually happened when fucking took place as I connected that to my jacking off.

When I was 13 or 14 I was very active in a scout troop. In fact my dad was the scoutmaster. We had gone on a two day hike on the Appalachian Trail. There were about 12 scouts, my dad, and a junior assistant scoutmaster, who was probably 19 or 20.

We found a spot to overnight at a little campsite that included a three sided lean-to. Four of us, along with the assistant scoutmaster, gathered in the lean-to while the rest pitched tents. Everybody had settled in for the night in our sleeping bags on the floor of the lean-to while the assistant scoutmaster was on a raised bench at the back of the hut. It was pitch dark when the voice of the assistant said, “Hey guys, look at this.”

He turned on a flashlight he held in one hand that illuminated a big red cock that he was masturbating with his other. He must have been jacking it for a while because just as he shined the light on his dick, a large amount of cum was oozing out. I remember being very fixated on what I was seeing. My cum always squirted out when I came but his was just flowing out of his dick. It was also very, very thick and not near as liquid as I was used to. He kept the light on the flowing cum as he milked every last drop out. Then turned it off. Not another word was said and as far as I know, nobody even mentioned it to one another the next day. I wondered if I should tell my dad but was too embarrassed to bring up something like that.

The only porn that was available back then was the rare 8-page bible that would turn up and get passed around. If I was lucky enough to get to hang onto one overnight, it would produce a frenzy of jerking off. I do remember one time jacking off five times in one night over an 8-page bible. They are available for downloading on the internet now and while I find them slightly arousing, it’s also amazing to me that I would get so excited looking at one to jack off five times.

By the time I was 15 I had discovered the joys of pussy and all through high school much of the cum I produced was achieved with a partner although I still enjoyed jacking my dick as frequently as possible.

Hard-ons in class were a constant daily activity. I had one pair of pants that had a large hole in the pocket and I would pull the head of my dick through the hole and massage it with my fingers in class. A couple of times I went too far and shot my cum into my pocket. As soon as class was over I would rush to the boy’s room for a secret clean-up. I would also try to achieve at least one orgasm a day in one of the stalls in the boy’s room. Sometimes I might jack off in there two or three times a day. Being a teen, it never took longer than a couple of minutes to shoot a load into the toilet. I’m sure plenty of my classmates were doing the same thing but I never knew or even suspected that others were doing the same thing I was.

It’s kind of amazing how easy it was to get hard back then. I could be sitting in class and just look at one of the girls sitting around me and instantly get hard. Looking back it almost seems like I was erect about 90% of the time in class. When getting up to go to the next class I would have to hold a book in front of me to hide my hard dick.

I focused 100% of my attention on the girls in high school and never paid any attention to my fellow male students who all probably had hard-ons as frequently as I did. Looking back I now wonder how many of the young female teachers were aware of all the hard dicks that were probably in their classes. I’m not sure how many of the female students were cognizant of being surrounded by a bunch of horny boys with throbbing cocks in their pants. Probably a bit different in the high schools of today where all the students are a lot more hip to what’s going on around them and way more sexually aware than when I was in high school.

At least from a sexual standpoint, I would love to be a high schooler today. Although I can’t really say I was sexually deprived during my days in high school. By the time I was a senior I had a steady girlfriend and we fucked every chance we had. At least four or five times a week. It’s a miracle we never got caught. We actually were sort of caught once by another couple who we were going to the movies with. We were at my parent’s house waiting to get picked up. I was lying on the sofa while my gf straddled me and bounced up and down on my cock. The other couple arrived way early and walked in on us.

We were both fully dressed and my gf’s skirt covered everything but there was no doubt as to what we were doing. They said they would wait in the car and left. My dick had gone limp so we didn’t finish. Nothing was ever said about it.


Aquarium Tubing

aquarium tubing used for urethral play

I went to an auto supply store, and bought 2-foot (60cm) lengths of clear flexible plastic tubing in the following outside diameters: 1/8-inch, 3/16-inch; 1/4-inch (approx 6mm), 5/16-inch, 3/8-inch, and 1/2-inch (approx 12.5mm). The 1/4-inch tubing is very similar to the plastic tubing used to pump air into aquariums.

I rounded and polished the ends, sterilized them, sterilized my hands and the end of my penis, and started playing.

I didn’t even bother with the 1/8-inch tubing, starting right out with 3/16-inch. It went in nicely, although it could have been a bit more flexible. It took a little while to push it through my prostate and urinary sphincters. What a remarkable feeling it is to have your prostate area invaded like that!

I pulled it out, and went to the 1/4-inch. That went all the way in easily. I noticed that once it was in my bladder, I had a kind of shuddering effect. The pee would flow through the opening, then the tube would be pressed against the wall of my bladder, shutting off the flow. Then with the pressure off, the tube would float away, and once again pee would flow. This shuddering against the soft bladder wall happened at a rate I’d guess to be around 4 – 6 cycles per second.
Next came the 5/16 tubing. It was a big challenge getting it all the way into my bladder, but I managed it!

The 3/8 could only be put in about 7 inches, to about where my penis disappears into my body. It just would not go any further, and I wasn’t willing to risk injury.

All in all, the afternoon was tremendous fun. However, a few weeks later, playing with inflating my bladder with water, I gave myself a huge infection. I recovered after a week, but have decided none of that is worth the risk. I have found much better ways to have sexual pleasure and orgasms, such as described here: Advanced Male Masturbation

Your Heart and Lungs Are Fine

Erotic Story: Your Heart And Lungs Are Fine

“Your heart and lungs are fine. You can be proud of your health. Many young men entering college already have issues like high blood pressure. It’s about diet. I could just strangle people who promote sugary foods.”

“Yeah, my parents have been pretty good about diet and stuff.”

“I see you have a bit of a bruise on your upper arm.”

“Yeah, I got that in school right before graduation. Messing around.”

“You’re not being bullied by anyone, are you?”

“Oh, no, Nothing like that. We were just playing…”

“You’d tell your parents, or me, or an adult if there was a problem with anyone, right?”


“How’s your home life? Does anything cause you stress?”

“Not really.”

“Good. I’m glad to hear it.”

“Now, would you please remove your underpants and stand right here beside the table?”


“While I press my fingers here, please turn your head and cough.”

“Again, please.”

“Now turn your head the other way and cough again.”

“Ok, hop back on the table and lay down.”

“I’m just going to check for lumps. It’s very rare, but sometimes boys get those on their testicles.”

“Oh, don’t be embarrassed. Many boys become erect during this procedure.”

“Are you intimate with anyone?”


“I mean, are you having sex with any girls, or boys?”


“OK, because you know about STDs, right?”

“Of course, they teach it in school.”

“I know, but I’m required to ask. How about when you masturbate? Is everything working oK?’

“Um, what makes you think I masturbate?”

“All boys do. I caught my own son masturbating a half-dozen times. Finally he just started doing it openly in front of us, even his sister.”

“What about her?”

“Oh, yes, she masturbated too. Still does. It’s perfectly natural. That’s another thing I could strangle people for. They make it a big hush-hush deal. Do you know 30 or 40 years ago, some parents tied their babies’ arms in cardboard tubes if the kids were found to be innocently touching themselves? There was a Dr. Kellogg, the same guy who invented corn flakes. Well, anyway…”

“What about this Dr. Kellogg?”

“Oh, you can look him up. He used to medically torture boys who masturbated. Sorry, I’m getting way off-topic. So, you’re OK when you masturbate?”

“Yeah… Well…”

“Go ahead, if anything concerns you, you can tell me. I am your doctor after all.”

“Oh, it’s nothing.”



“Go on, your medical history is entirely safe with me.”

“I don’t think I produce enough sperm.”

“Why do you think that?”

“Well, not very much comes out.”

“How much does come out?”

“I don’t know how to explain it. Some. OK, so it’s not as much as I’ve seen in porn.”

“It’s alright that you’ve seen porn. I suppose that we should check that you’re OK.”

“Um, no, it’s not necessary.”

“Are you sure?”

“Well, actually, I am a bit worried about it.”

“We don’t want you going around worried. Worry causes stress and stress is unhealthy. Let’s take a look.”

“Miss Flanders.” [yelled loudly] “Come in here please. We need a chaperone.”

“I wouldn’t want to be accused of doing anything incorrect.”

“Isn’t she just the receptionist? Not a nurse?”

“Yes, but as a witness, she’s fine.”

“Um, OK, but it makes me feel funny.”

“I understand. – Nancy, pull up a stool and just sit so you can watch and verify that I’m acting professionally.”

“OK Dr. Evans.”

“I see you’re still erect. That’s a good sign for a boy your age. Now, please produce some sperm for us.”

“Nancy, he expressed concern that his volume of semen may be low.”

“That’s it. Just pretend you’re at home, or wherever you masturbate. You can pretend Miss Flanders and I are not here.”

“Take your time. You’re the last patient of the day.”

“That’s it. Very good!”

“Ok, young man. You’re perfectly healthy. That is a normal volume of ejaculate.”

“You can put your clothes on, and thank you very much for being a great patient.”

Masturbate-A-Thon, Another Perspective

A Detailed Report on the Masturbate-A-Thon

I attended the annual Masturbate-A-Thon in San Francisco. I went three years running. Every year was better than the last. I considered it the world’s greatest sex party. This was my first year. About 120 people showed up, 70% male, 30% female. The idea was to wank for charity. Like a walk-a-thon, friends, family and coworkers pledged. But pledges weren’t amounts of money for miles covered. It was for minutes masturbated, or in a few cases, for number of orgasms.

I had to overcome some serious shyness to ask friends and coworkers, “Hey, I’m going to the Masturbate-A-Thon, do you want to pledge some money?” Surprisingly, eight of them did pledge. They were all quite supportive. I expected some would be shocked, maybe even giving me religious anti-masturbation lectures or something. But no, none of that. I invited all them to attend with me, but none did.

I invited my wife, and she said “OK.” But then day before the event was to take place, she backed out, and was mad at me because I still wanted to attend. I was sad she wouldn’t be there with me, but wouldn’t have missed it for the world!

I showed up an hour early and volunteered to help out. I helped a guy move hand trucks full of snacks and soda, I ran a floor sweeper and things like that. A couple of the volunteers were naked. Most were clothed. I took my clothes off, felt silly, then put them back on. One guy, a fellow I’ve mentioned in other articles here on Sex270, was not only naked, but sporting a boner, as he climbed up a ladder to run a video cable to the stage area.

Oh, yes, people who signed a waiver and got a purple wrist band would be videoed if they so chose. The video was a live internet feed, and a downloadable video would follow. At one point, to my total surprise, I found myself on that stage getting a handjob from none other than Nina Hartley, one of the world’s greatest porn stars, while clothed technicians with big handheld video cameras were filming me, sometimes quite close. That ended all too soon. (No, I didn’t cum in her hands.)

Nina Hartley attended the Masturbate-A-Thon
Nina Hartley

All in all, it was a spectacular party. It wasn’t just that over a hundred strangers got naked together and jerked off, most managing to edge, to hold it in, for hours. It was much more too. It was great conversation and companionship.

I want to tell you the most erotic part of the whole thing, what I remember most, and what makes me most horny when I look back on it, even to this day. And, it isn’t anything you probably would have guessed. The thing that I really remember is that once, during our allotted 5-minute break every hour, I had to go pee. I had to walk through a narrow hallway that was crowded with an assortment of clothed people. There were San Francisco dignitaries, news people, and others. Some were coming from or going to the viewing gallery, where some people had paid $40 per head not to participate, but only to watch. Go figure!

So, squeezing stark naked through the crowded hallway, with my boner sticking out at a strong right angle, I was like ‘excuse me, excuse me.’ At one point, I turned sort of sideways, and slipped past an elegant youngish woman dressed in a business suit and high heels. As I passed, my penis brushed against her hip. I quietly said, “Sorry,” and she just smiled.

So that’s the thing. The whole giant party was spectacular, with all tons of jerking off, all sorts of female and male people to watch, to talk with, and who were watching me as we all wanked together. But that momentary little brush against the woman’s hip is the thing that really gets me, even to this day.

By the way, the longest participant set a Guinness world record that day, lasting eight hours and 43 minutes. I was the third longest at 8:20. I don’t know how I lasted that long, but I did, and it was glorious all the way through. I actually quit, letting myself cum with a huge ejaculation, at 8:20 because I was afraid of actually being the ‘winner.’ I didn’t think I would want that publicity.

You’d think I’d be sore, maybe tired the next day, but no, I jerked off a couple of times the next day, just remembering what had happened.

Middle School Madness

Middle school sexual madness

Our school was one of the last in the country to get rid of the concept that boys swim naked, girls wear suits. Of course the girls and the boys had separate swim times, but still, I was one of the last to have to strip naked with a bunch of boys and go swimming.

But that wasn’t bad enough. This was in the days of forced integration. The schools had to mix the black and white kids. The school system in our particularly violent city had the remarkably bad idea of integrating a traditionally all-black high school, by changing it into a mixed junior-senior high school, then bringing all white 7th and 8th graders, who had to defend themselves against much larger black kids in a world where the kids of both colors were taught hate by their parents. Not only that, the school was ridiculously overcrowded.

Needless to say, I had a bad time. I had a bus pass, and had to take city two busses each way, every day. I got up ridiculously early in the morning, and got home late.

I was assaulted many times in the school, and on the busses, too. I’m not sure how I came through all that unscathed.

Due to all the mixing of kids around the city, I only knew a few kids in the whole school, and none of them were in my huge gym class of approximately 60 boys.

The teachers in this wonderful school had given up on actually teaching. The gym teachers, for instance, sat in a glass walled office overlooking the pool and shower room, reading paperbacks and not participating in any way. For the baseball rotation, all 60 kids tromped out into the school yard, and tried to figure out for themselves how to manage an inning and a half of softball with so many kids in the outfield. The teachers stayed inside.

It was only a few minutes on the field, because for some reason I’ll never know, all gym classes required two showers. We were told to shower before going out on the field, then shower again afterward.

The shower room was a big open room, with showerheads lining the walls. All the boys were naked. It was terrible, yet it wasn’t so terrible. I was rather excited by the idea of seeing other nude kids. Especially their balls and willies. I was fascinated by the black kids. Their penises were much larger. Not because they were black, although perhaps there’s an optical illusion that makes black objects seem larger than white ones. It was because they were older. They had gone through adolescence, growing full-size genitals. Most were also uncircumcised, whereas the white kids were cut. In this class, most of the big black kids had hair ‘down there.’ Most of the white kids had no hair, or were just starting out with a few straggly hairs that you could barely see. No one had an erection.

At the time, I was imagining that if any of the boys got erect, they’d be hounded out of the school. It was fashionable to point out anything ‘gay’ about another boy as a way of teasing. Having an erection among the boys would have been an over-the-top infraction of our unwritten rules.

Another thing I’ll never be able to understand is that after the showers, sometimes the three gym teachers would put down their books, come into the shower room, line us all up, then slowly walk up and down the line behind us, every now and then pointing out a boy who had dirty ankles. That’s right, these teachers seemed to be concerned specifically with our ankles. Sometimes a couple of kids would be held back while the rest of us dressed to go on to our next class. I never knew what happened with the held-back kids.

When the swimming rotation came around, I was filled with dread. The showers were bad enough. I hadn’t been naked in front of anyone since before I could remember, except for doctor’s exams. Even those weren’t naked. He’d stick his hand in my underpants, feel around for like three seconds, then get on with the rest of the exam.

The day came, and like all the other kids, almost all of which were feeling weird and shy as we were marched out of the shower room, into the echoey, windowless, green tile lined swimming pool room.

We stood along the walls shivering. The gym teachers had disappeared again. There was no instruction. A few kids jumped in, and eventually most of us did. We just splashed around a bit, then it was back to the showers. I stayed in the shallow end, because I couldn’t swim, and was afraid to put my head under water. I learned nothing in that class, and still can’t swim, fifty years later.

Nothing more happened that day. Two days later, it was another swimming day. It started the same. All sixty kids showered, then went naked into the pool room. We got in the water more quickly. At one point, a big scary black kid started swimming back and forth in front of me, and when he popped up, he whispered in a hoarse voice that he expected me to meet him behind the cafeteria after school. I didn’t know what that was about, but it scared the hell out of me. You can bet I stayed well away from behind the cafeteria for weeks after that.

There was something sexual insinuated in his request. Maybe he was offering or asking for a blowjob. I don’t know, or don’t remember. I’m not even sure I knew what a blowjob was back then. But it had an effect on me. Maybe it was the vision of his smooth, shiny black butt. Maybe it was being talked to while naked by a boy. Maybe because there was something in his voice, as if he especially liked me or something. I started growing an erection. I was immediately scared. More scared than the threat of this big black kid. In a moment, I’d have to hop out of the pool, and everyone would see me with a boner. What was I to do? What could I do? I was thinking frantically, but had no answer.

Then, one of the coaches reentered, and blew a whistle. This was the moment of no return. My erection had not subsided. I did the only thing I could do, I climbed out of the pool and lined up against the wall with the other kids. At first I tried to keep my hands in front of my erection, but I realized that only made the situation more obvious. I brought my hands to my sides, giving up. I tried acting as if I was being bold, and proud or at least indifferent to show my erection. Nothing could be further from the truth, but what else could I do? Now-a-days, I wonder about that. Why did the erection persist? Was the fear actually affecting me adversely?

I was convinced all the boys would point, and laugh, and call me all sorts of names like ‘gay’ and maybe even worse. There was a bit of snickering, and a couple of pointed fingers, but not nearly the fanfare I had worried about.

In the shower, the erection would still not go down. I had given up, and just walked around and in the locker room with it waving, sticking straight out in front of me. No one talked to me, no one said anything. There wasn’t any more snickering or pointing. Finally, I dressed, and the erection subsided.

Once I got home and to the privacy of my bedroom, I was very preoccupied with what had happened. How could I ever return to school? What was I going to do? Then too, I was feeling something else. Like every afternoon after gym class, I jerked off with memories of the naked boys. I had orgasms that were still mostly dry, maybe letting out a drop or two of clear semen. But the orgasms were very enjoyable. They also made me feel guilty. Among the other teasing and carrying on among boys my age was the general idea that masturbation was a very bad, even a ‘gay’ thing. But the orgasms were so good! After that swimming class, I was especially horned up and still scared at the same time, and jerked off big-time. When I came, for the first time in my life, the cum was thicker and had a whitish cast.

The next Tuesday was like facing a firing squad. I had to swim naked again, and I was the boy who had had an erection in front of everyone. The reaction I got as I entered the shower naked with the other kids wasn’t at all what I was expecting. Boys, both big and black, and little and white, started coming up to me and trying to start conversations. They somehow respected me, or wanted to know me or something. That was a huge surprise.

Well, that was fifty years ago. I still think about the whole thing from time to time. I know now that things were way worse than I realized at the time. The school officials should have been sued. We learned almost nothing in that school, and I do believe there was something way more off about those gym teachers than I’ll ever know. I do remember telling my parents, and they simply didn’t believe me, thinking I must be making it up, because surely a school couldn’t be that bad. And, “Why was I talking so negatively about black people?” they asked.

For high school, I was transferred to a school in my neighborhood that was all white 9th – 12th graders, and integrated with all black 7th and 8th graders.

Here’s the good news: Although I’m a high-school dropout, I’m alive, happy, well, and somewhat successful today. Although I am bisexual, I’ve been happily married to the same woman for 32 years. I don’t hate black people although I was starting to during my junior high-school years. In fact, my wife is black.

I wrote another version of this memoir here: Integration, in which I was originally too shy to mention my own erection.

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