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Like Temple Grandin

My wife and I were in bed discussing this and that before we planned to fall asleep, as usual. We have settled down to where we don’t need to have sex every day.

I was talking about Temple Grandin. She’s a high-functioning autistic woman who has revolutionized the ranching business by designing more humane equipment for the treatment of animals. One of her best-known inventions is a squeeze frame. If you put a cow in a frame that wraps around their body and holds them firmly, they seem to calm down during whatever you have to do to them.

I once talked with a large animal veterinarian who told me cattle will sometimes eat barbed wire. They require surgery to remove it. He’d put a cow in a squeeze frame, and do the surgery on the side of the animal’s belly without anesthesia (or maybe with something topical on the skin), and the animal calmly just stood there and put up with all the action inside it’s belly.

She learned that from her own experience. While she didn’t enjoy being touched by other humans, she did discover that having her mattress or blankets wrapped firmly around her body calmed her. She designed a special bed that wrapped her tight.

As I was telling my wife, who knows I suffer from insomnia, she wondered if that might help me. She suggested she put her hand firmly over my balls as I try to fall asleep. I said “Sure,” and she did so. I also put my hand firmly against her vagina.

There we were, laying with each other’s hands on our genitals. She was kind of cupping my scrotum firmly. Not firmly enough to hurt. Far from it. But comfortably firm. Her hand was so warm and nice. Of course I had an erection in no time, but we both ignored that.

The next thing I knew, light was streaming in through the curtains. I had fallen asleep quickly and peacefully with her holding my scrotum, erection and all. Of course by morning, her hand was no longer on me. I didn’t even know one could fall asleep with a hardon.

Now we do that once or twice a week. Anytime I’m feeling rattled by the day’s events, or she’s a bit upset by something, we do that for each other. It’s wonderful.

How to Find Out if a Friend is Gay

Someone on Quora asked, “How can you find out if a friend is gay?” I’m assuming the question was because the writer would like to become involved with a potentially gay friend, but was afraid of consequences if his guess was wrong.

Here’s what I wrote:

You might ask something like, “Are you offended by gay people?” or “What do you think about the LGBTQ movement?” The answers should be interesting. Keep in mind that some gay and bi people are so closeted that they’ll pretend to be offended, maybe even say disparaging remarks.

If that scares you, try asking about a gay character in film or on TV, like Kurt Hummel of Glee. Like, “Did you see Glee? What did you think of Rachel Berry (a straight person)? How about Finn Hudson (also straight)? How about Kurt Hummel (gay)?” If all you get is generic responses, you could go a step further, “Did Kurt being gay bother you?”

I think you can take it from there!

Josephine Baker

Josephine Baker was a sexy and highly sexual woman. She became the biggest African-American star in the world. Here is her strange mini-biography.

Josephine was born in 1906 on the wrong side of the tracks in Saint Louis, Missouri, USA. Her grandparents on her mother’s side had been slaves.

Josephine Baker as a baby

Her parents had a vaudeville background. Vaudeville was live variety entertainment presented in theaters. Acts ranged from singing and dancing to magic, juggling, trained animal acts, and comedy. Back in the day, vaudeville was an attractive pursuit that was profitable for some performers, but barely made ends meet for most.

Her deadbeat father was a drummer who left when Josephine was one year old. He may have been of Native American heritage. No one seems to know for sure. Her poor mother had to take in laundry to barely put food on the table.

To make matters worse, her mother found another man to marry. Another deadbeat. Oh, this one didn’t leave the family, but he didn’t work either. He spent his days sitting around reading the newspaper. The family was so poor that Josephine, her younger step-brother and two step-sisters, her mother and father all slept in the same bed.

After a while, that was too much for her, so she took to sleeping on the floor, under a blanket made from newspapers.

When she was eight years old, to bring in more money her mother sent her off to work for a white family as a maid. Things got worse, not better. Josephine slept in that family’s basement with their dog.

One time, she put too much soap in the laundry. The white woman burned her hands. Evidently, it was just mild enough not to leave permanent scars.

Despite all that, Josephine managed to stay in school until age twelve.

Things weren’t yet bad as they could be. By the age of thirteen, she was living on the streets, scavenging for food and using cardboard boxes for shelter from the weather. Needing money, she took up unskilled street performing. She emulated popular dances of the era, Trucking, The Tack-Annie, The Itch, and Messing Around.

Finally, things started to improve. She met and married Willie Wells. She was thirteen years old at the time. He was fifteen. One can only imagine what kind of sex life they had. How much did they even know about sex at that age?

Josephine’s rough street performing improved and she started performing with the Jones Family street performers in front of Booker T Washington theater.

One day, the opening act in the theater, the Dixie Steppers, failed to show. You guessed it. The Jones family, along with Josephine were invited into the theater to perform on stage.

By this time, Josephine could dance, cross her eyes, and play trombone at the same time. She had comedy talent.

By the time she was 15 years old, she had divorced Willie, and married a guy named William Howard Baker at age 15. Just like her father, William turned out to be a lazy non-worker. Isn’t it amazing how often people will marry someone who has the same traits as one of their parents?

Right around this time, the manager of the Dixie Stepper took the Jones family and Josephine to New York. During this time, Josephine’s career evolved. She was truly a professional, although not by any means well-paid.

Still only fifteen years old, Josephine won a role in the 1921 all-Black production “Shuffle Along.” She played comedy clown at the end of a chorus line who couldn’t keep up, stumbling around out of time, and making a hilarious mess, but she ended the routine with skillful dancing.

She performed in New York City for four years as her skill continued to grow. Then, at age nineteen, she moved to Paris, France.

She became a nearly instant sensation. Billed as having come from an African tribe, she could dance like no other, taking what she had learned on the streets of Saint Luis including things like popping and locking, which she was doing decades ahead of time, to the stages of Paris.

Some have said that she’s the founder of much modern dance including hip-hop. Reviewers at the time called her style ‘uninhibited.’ Beyonce, among other modern celebrities have attributed some of their skills to Josephine’s influence.

It didn’t hurt that she was an exceptionally beautiful Black woman, a rarity in France. Furthermore, it didn’t hurt that she danced nearly naked, something that was somewhat common in Paris at the time. Did I say ‘nearly naked?’ She was absolutely topless other than some necklaces, and had invented a skirt made of sixteen rubber bananas that were hung from a belt and swayed back and forth in such a way that the audience could see everything. She was obviously not afraid to be seen in her entirety. According to some reports, she sometimes performed 100% naked.

Josephine Baker in her banana skirt, also known as banana girdle

Two years later, Josephine Baker became the ‘Toast of Paris.’

Josephine Baker, the Toast of Paris

Great opportunities came her way. She was the the first black star in a major motion picture, Siren of the Tropics, a silent film released in 1927. Later she starred in “Zuzu” in 1934, and “Princes TamTam” in 1935.

One of her trademarks was a spit curl, a little lock of hair that was pasted to her forehead, Betty Boop style. In fact Betty Boop, who came along in 1930, may have been inspired by Josephine Baker. Josephine started selling the paste she used for that spit curl, calling it BakerFix, and made a literal fortune with her acting plus that product.

Another trademark, besides nudity in performing and the spit curl, was that she seldom if ever wore high heels, preferring flats. That was probably influenced by her dancing.

While many people have a housecat or a dog, Josephine fell in love with Chikita, a cheetah, giving her kitty a diamond collar that matched Josephine’s diamond bracelet. Josephine were sometimes spotted around Paris in her white convertible Rolls Royce, with Chikita by her side. She often performed with Chikita on stage. Sometimes the cat would wander down to the orchestra pit, scaring the musicians, which added to the show.

She fell in love with Giuseppe Pepito Abatino, a former stone mason from Sicily. Unlike her father and now estranged second husband, Pepito actually worked. He became her agent. She couldn’t marry him because she was still technically married to William.

Already on a spectacular projectory, with Pepito’s management, she became the most successful Black woman in Europe.

With all her success, she still missed America. She pestered Pepito to get her a booking on Broadway. He got her a starring role in the 1936 Zigfield Follies. However, this was America. She couldn’t drink from ‘white’ drinking fountains, couldn’t use ‘white’ bathrooms, or eat in ‘white’ restaurants. She had to use the service entrance of the very theater in which she was performing.

As you can imagine, she went back to France as soon as the Zigfield gig was done.

In time, she could have married Pepito, but he died of stomach cancer when she was 30 years old.

She counted among her friends Jean Cocteau, who is described in Wikipedia as “French poet, playwright, novelist, designer, filmmaker, visual artist and critic.”

Ernest Hemingway called her the ‘most sensational woman anyone ever saw.’

Picasso featured her in art.

So what about her sex life? When asked, she would say she believed sex was a good workout, it was fun.

She had many affairs with men, sometimes picking up random guys in nightclubs. Women too. She had an affair with Ada “Bricktop” Smith, who was the other famous Black woman in Paris at the time. Ada was a singer, dancer, and owned a nightclub in Paris.

Josephine Baker's Friend, Ada Bricktop Smith
Ada “Bricktop” Smith

According to a Wikipedia article, Josephine also had lesbian affairs with French novelist Colette, and possibly Frida Kahlo.


Frida Kahlo

Time went on. She continued in her success. In 1937 she married Jewish French industrialist, Jean Lion. For a year, they had a wonderful time, riding horseback, flying in private planes, going fox hunting, and wining and dining with the biggest of celebrities. She left Jean after fourteen months, at least in part because of her many affairs with both men and women.

Along came World War II. She hated the Nazis. They were like prejudiced white people in America, but they tormented Jews instead of Black people. Josephine also loved France so much, the country where she was invited to dine with white people for the first time in her life, the country where everyone adored her for who she was rather than shun her just for her skin color, that she signed up as a spy with the French Resistance.

She also performed for the troops. She never charged any money for these performances. At the same time, being the celebrity that she was, she could wine and dine with many influential people, including Nazi dignitaries. She was able to get next to them – in bed one would assume, listen to their secrets, and pass them on to the French military intelligence and eventually President Charles deGaul.

At one point, she was asked to set up an army entertainment camp in Morocco. She did entertain the troops, but it was really a cover for her continuing spying activity. While in Morocco, she nearly died from the last in a series of miscarriages, probably brought on by improper abortions. This one was so bad that she developed peritonitis and a blood infection. Her uterus was removed.

Even as she was still recovering from that, she continued not only her spy work, but also, along with a entourage, she entertained the troops, charging no money, and allowing no civilians in the audience.

When the German men spilled the beans, ‘mansplained’ as one biographer called it, she wrote notes that she folded into her panties. She had no problem passing through customs as she went from country to country. No one was going to strip search the famous Josephine Baker. Instead, customs officials asked for her autograph.

Another bold trick she used to smuggle information was to write in invisible ink on her sheet music. Of course she’d always be carrying sheet music in her business.

When she was forced to leave France, she took out as many Jewish refugees as she could fit in her Rolls Royce.

The war ended. Time went on. The little girl who grew up abused and in abject poverty remained one of the biggest and wealthiest stars in Europe.

In 1947 at the age of 41, Josephine married orchestra leader, Jo Bouillon. Jo Baker and Jo Bouillon.

By the age 45, she could sing in English, French, Italian, Portuguese, Yiddish.

May 20, 1951 was declared Josephine Baker day by the NAACP.

Even though she could perform at the world-renowned Stork Club, she evidently couldn’t sit in the audience. When the management tried to expel her, Grace Kelly, later to become Princess Grace of Monaco, held her arm and walked out with her, including Grace’s entire entourage. They became close friends.

Also in 1951, while performing at the Stork Club, she complained about their policy of discouraging black audience members. Her friend Walter Winchell did not come to her defense, she she got mad at him. He retaliated by calling her a Communist in his newspaper column. That, among other complications, resulted in the government canceling her visa. Once again, she had to return to France.

She came back a few times to the United States, where she was also a celebrity, but not on the same scale as in France. In the US, she was still a ‘Negro’ and relegated to only designated restaurants, bathrooms and hotels. At one point, she was turned down by 36 hotels because she was black. People were still so fucked up about race in America that her magnificent performance in the follies earned her bad reviews.

Here’s a Time Magazine review:

“Josephine Baker is a Saint Louis washwoman’s daughter who stepped out of a negro burlesque show and into a life of adulation and luxury in Paris during the booming 1920s. In sex appeal to jaded Europeans of the jazz-loving type, a Negro wench always has a head start. The particular tawny tint of tall and stringy Josephine Baker’s bare skin stirred French pulses, but to Manhattan theater-goers last week, she was just a slightly buck-toothed young negro woman who’s figure might be matched in any nightclub show, who’s dancing and singing could be topped practically anywhere outside France.”

Shortly after the war, and possibly starting before, she began executing a brilliant idea, one many years ahead of its time. In 1936 she had purchased Château des Milandes, a chateau with a village that she hoped to turn into something like Dollywood, with peacocks, a J-shaped swimming pool, hotel, rides, and much more.

She also started adopting children, but not just any children. She wanted variety for a very special reason. She initially wanted a white child, a black child, a yellow child and a red child. She did manage to adopt White, Black and Asian children, but never managed to find a ‘red’ – American Indian child.

In total, she had twelve kids, ten boys and two girls, that she called her Rainbow Tribe. The kids she selected came from varied backgrounds, Catholic, Jewish and Muslim. She was intent on proving that people of different backgrounds can get along just fine. She said, “They will serve as an example of true democracy and be living proof that if people are left in peace, nature takes care of the rest.”

Most of her kids grew up to become successful, although one did commit suicide as an adult.

One of her children, Finnish-born Jarry, came out as gay at the age of 15. Uncharacteristically, Josephine, herself a practicing bisexual, threw him out, forcing him to live with his adoptive father, Jo Bouillion, by then in Argentina. This must have been due to what she figured would be negative publicity for her Rainbow Tribe. But still! Right?

How was Josephine as a person? People say she was sweet and kind, but also could act like a demanding brat, in the way that rapid wealth can spoil people.

When in America, she was a big civil rights advocate, being the only female speaker in the 1963 March on Washington.

When Dr. Martin Luther King was assassinated, his wife, Coretta Scott King, asked Josephine to lead the civil rights movement, but she turned it down out of consideration for the safety of her children.

The Château des Milandes experiment never quite worked out. If you’ve ever owned a village with a chateau, then you know they can absorb a lot of money. In fact, Château des Milandes ate up all of Josephine’s fortune. By 1968, she was flat broke, and was evicted from the villa. Leaving her home of 32 years was not easy for her. She had to be removed bodily.

Fortunately, her friend actress Grace Kelly, gave her an apartment in which she could stay and live in style for the rest of her life.

In 1975, at the age of 68, Josephine Baker was still a very well-regarded celebrity. A sold-out show celebrating Josephine’s fifty years in entertainment was arranged at Carnegie Hall. She performed brilliantly. The show was attended by Mick Jagger, Sophia Loren, Jackie Onasis, among others.

Four days later, she died peacefully in her bed, surrounded by newspapers all with glowing reviews of her performance.

20,000 people attended Josephine Baker’s funeral.

43 First Time Blowjobs

Compiled By Spurtz

1. “I tried my best, but he kinda just wanted to fuck my mouth like they do it in porn. That couldn’t really happen because I had a hard time with my teeth. I wasn’t that good, so I just told him masturbate into my mouth. He came, and I swallowed. I believe the only reason I swallowed because I had Brussels sprouts early that day that I didn’t like. So in the moment, the cum didn’t taste bad. I don’t remember the taste of it though, all I know was that it tasted better than Brussels sprouts.”

2. “Awkward. I had no idea how to keep my teeth from touching it. I was next to a fish tank and I felt so judged by all of the fish.”

3. “We were both 14. We hid in the bushes somewhere. He was rock hard which scared me, and dribbled into my mouth for what felt like forever. He groaned a lot and said my name in a dying-battery type of voice.”

4. “Common sense tells you dicks should taste like skin… because they’re covered in skin. Sweaty skin. But that was still a surprise. I was like licking the inner soft spot of someone’s sweaty arm.”

5. “Oh, my god I’m about to put a dick in my mouth! Am I doing this right? God, I hope this is right. Should I actually SUCK?! Yeah, lick right there, that’s the ‘sensitive’ part… damn this is tiring. My mouth hurts. What do I do when he cums? What if I gag/puke? Does he like this? Oh no. He’s gonna cum, that’s what you wanted, right dummy? Blech it’s warm, slimy, and salty. Mostly slimy. Try to swallow. Nope. Just let it coolly ooze out of your mouth on his dick. That’ll work. He’s found you out! Apologize. Grab towel and wipe off mouth. Cuddle. Fall asleep.”

6. “It was my 22nd birthday and I had gotten in a huge fight with my former best friend, who happened to be at the same bar we were at celebrating my birthday. I was upset so I just poured shots down my throat (ended up with over a $200 bar tab). Was dancing with a guy and got really turned on so I told him I wanted to go down on him. We went out to the patio area where I thought was secluded and pulled down his pants and I started to give him head. I was drunk so I don’t remember anything but him moaning a lot, and then somebody came out onto the patio to stop us. Turns out, we were right in front of a window and everybody saw. I started crying and my friends got me home. Almost four years later and I STILL have not lived this down.”

7. I was 16. I been crushing on a neighbor guy for months. He was your typical teenage bad boy. He asked me to skip school one morning and go over to his place. He’d never given me the time of day before. I go over around 8:30. He’s not wasting any time. He takes me straight to the couch and we start making out. He unzips his pants and kinda pushes my head down. I was aiming to please so I didn’t resist. I’m doing my best not to scratch his dick with my teeth, and he starts pushing on the back of my head. I gagged a little. He did it again, I gagged again. I asked him to please stop pushing on my head because it was making me gag. Turns out this guy was a fucking asshole. He did it again, harder. I puked all over him. Covered his dick, balls, pants, underwear, couch, and floor with my breakfast. He yells ‘What the fuck!?’ We both jump up, he’s disgusted, I’m utterly mortified. He runs to the sink, I’m frantically looking around for a towel or something. He turns to me, puke covered pants around his knees, dick still dripping chunks and tells me to just leave. I ran home crying. Never talked to that fucking asshole again.”

8. “First blowjob I ever gave was hands-down the worst blowjob ever in the history of blowjobs. It was my best friend’s brother. My best friend was super psycho protective over her brothers, so I was terrified she was going to wake up and come beat me up the entire time I had this dick in my mouth. Literally had no idea how to go about the deed, so coupled with my bone-gripping terror, I more or less chewed on his dick until he came. Not sucking, or licking, but gentle gnawing with my panicked eyes glued on the door. I had never seen a dick in real life before, only pictures. He was Native American, so it freaked me the fuck out when his pubes were stick straight instead of curly. There I am, a terrified virgin gnawing away at this alien member until he came and I literally ran out of the room and didn’t talk to him for almost a month. Flash forward years later. Dude tracks me down on Facebook, and starts randomly sending me videos of him jacking off, telling me he’s never gotten the feel of my teeth out of his head, and no blowjob will ever be as good. Fucking weirdo.”

9. “I have never been more aware of my teeth than I was at that moment. I’d had it hyped up in my mind so much that you keep your teeth far, far away from the penis or it will be absolute agony that I was convinced he’d be better off sticking his dick into a spool of barbed wire. Turns out, unless you’re straight-up chomping away at it, it’s pretty easy to keep them out of the way.”

10. “Oh man, I did so much research beforehand ha-ha. I Yahoo’d it, and downloaded porn so I could study up. I practiced shoving my toothbrush down my throat, for deep throat practice. I read that it’s hard on your jaw, so I chewed lots of gum to train my face muscles. I think I took notes and everything. You could probably make a Rocky-type montage of my blow job training as a dorky teenager with acne and braces. When it came to the deed, I was so nervous and I felt like I was taking an exam, and literally switched from technique to technique: mint in mouth, fizzy water, warm tea. Then sucking, swirling the head, blowing on tip, to name just a few. Deep throat, but only once lol. I think I just confused the poor guy’s penis, but he came anyway, because he was also a super inexperienced teenager.”

11. “Terrifying, I had no clue what I was doing. The family computer was in the living room so any Googling was risky. I got my tips from Cosmo. When I started humming my boyfriend asked what the fuck I was doing.”

12. “He was guiding me through everything so that was helpful. ‘Right there… just like that. All the way up and all the way down. Try not to use your teeth. Wanna try using two hands?’ Me: ‘My mouth is getting kinda tired’ Him: ‘You can just spit on it and stroke it for a while with your hands—I’ll warn you when I’m getting close.’ But during it I felt pretty powerful looking into his eyes and hearing him softly moan every now and then — knowing that I was the one causing his pleasure.”

13. “‘Ok… Here we go… I hope I’m not horrible at it. Ok… Hmmm this isn’t too bad, ok, apply some of the things you’ve seen in porn and some advice you’ve gotten from Cosmo. This doesn’t taste like anything… Good! No teeth! No teeth! Ok… Alright, he’s enjoying it… I think… Ok good… he’s moaning, good sign. God… ah! WTH? Oh, he came. Oh ok… Good. Hmmm cum doesn’t really taste like anything. Consistency is kind of gross. Not as bad as I thought. Interesting.’

14. “Pretty awkward. I just kept thinking, WTF am I doing? I feel dumb. Does he like this? Well he for sure did and came all over my shirt as we were about to go to a pool party. I tried so hard to get it off but I was a rookie and used hot water! Now I love doing it. It’s probably my favorite thing to do. I don’t even need reciprocation. 10/10 my boyfriend is a happy man.”

15. “For me, it was an experience of ‘Meh? Meh.’ That’s pretty much how I still feel about it. For him, I guess it was either the best or the worst thing he had experienced. He came while laughing and kept laughing for a good five minutes after while I felt stupid and embarrassed and thought ‘Welp, no porno or Hollywood movie ever told me about this part’.’ I didn’t dare ask him if it was laughably good or laughably bad and to this day, 10 years later, I still have no idea if he and his friends knows me as the terribly bad or terribly good blowjob girl.”

16. “It was awkward at first. I remember feeling half grossed out and half turned on. He kept telling me to think of it like Go-Gurt. I remember my jaw was hurting and so were my knees and the bastard didn’t even give me a courtesy warning when he was going to cum. I swallowed most of it but some of it came out. He said he thought it would be better if he didn’t warn me… even though he knew it was my first time!”

17. “We were watching his favorite movie and I didn’t have the heart to tell him I wanted to make out… so I started getting fidgety and thinking I totally could give a blow job. I could touch the back of my throat and not gag. So I started playing with him, trying to be sly and the conversation was like,

Him: W-what are you doing?

Me: Do you trust me?

Him: Of course I do. (Bright red face)

Me: Then keep watching your movie

And it kinda happened. I had no clue what I was doing really, I mean, I read some articles because I wanted to know do’s and don’ts. But he definitely didn’t expect it… and I didn’t expect him to cum that fast. But I swallowed. It didn’t taste as bad as I thought it would. Just made me really thirsty.

We’re still together today.”

18. “First of all, this was the first time I had seen someone of the opposite sex naked. So this was also this first time I had seen a penis in real life that didn’t belong to some kid whose diaper I was changing. Being 19 this wasn’t only mildly embarrassing, but also strange because we were in my dorm room and the girls that lived next to me were in their room making a bunch of racket. So we get started. Lucky me they were huge, I could already see the outline in their briefs, problem was I have a small mouth. (Being a dork) I had read something off handed on a Cosmo magazine about ‘how to give the best head’ and tried to keep that in mind. Something about using an 8 count?

Underwear comes off and the thing is right in front of my face, But I could hardly get it in my mouth, and when I could it was practically prying my jaws apart. I could only go about 1/5 of the way down, it was insane…

Ended up just licking it really awkwardly, and using my hands mostly. At the end of it he just told me ‘it was okay, I guess.’

19. “It happened for the first time about 7 months ago. I had like no experience doing ANYTHING sexual at all, so I figured a BJ would be the simplest option for me. We were both on the couch and I started off with a HJ. The feeling of it was so foreign, yet so intriguing at the same time. The warmth of his dick, the way it pulsates… as much as I had fun playing with it, I quickly realized that this wasn’t going to mean much in the long run since I really had no idea what I was doing. I couldn’t tell which part of the dick felt better to touch or rub, it looked all the same to me besides the obvious head and shaft parts. The only thing going for me at this point was a few tips I read about on Reddit prior to this. After a few minutes of that, I laid down on my stomach and took his dick into my mouth. It was like playing with a meat-rod joystick that took up most of the space in my mouth. There wasn’t a taste of it that stood out to me, it was more like texture of the dick and the thickness of it. The head seemed very smooth to me, the underneath of the head suddenly more rigid, and the shaft feeling like it was just THICK. I recall running my tongue around his head, wondering how much he was getting from this. I didn’t go very far down on him, I was focusing only on the head and upper shaft.

My mouth is pretty small, so it wasn’t going to take in a lot during this first encounter. The further I shoved it in, the more I felt like I was going to gag. I was pretty good with making sure he didn’t hit my teeth, but I probably still sucked (in a bad way) at it because I went on for 15-20 minutes before he pried me off. Granted his sister had woken up and was walking around the house but that was the end of it for a while. The next day my mouth was sore, my throat hurt (despite not going in that far), and I felt like I was SURE I got some kind of STD. Within a week, it went away but I was scared for a while. I honestly felt like I fucked up the whole experience and he would never try again with me. To my surprise, he still kept on visiting me and tried again with me like after a month or so (when we were finally alone again). I think my third time I finally got him to cum after 10 minutes. I was also going MUCH further down on him (to a point that it hits my tonsils now) and I used way more tongue as I was pulling him into my mouth. When he finally came, I took it all in and swallowed. It was like a sort of mucus to me in both feeling and taste, but I didn’t mind. I felt finally rewarded after failing a few times. I had my hand at the very base of dick and loved the feeling as it shook intensely from his orgasm. I still feel kinda clueless since the two of us don’t communicate well, but given that he’s always so close to me, he seems to be enjoying it. Hell, I’ve caught him making quick glances at his stiffy as he’s sitting next to me on the couch, as if he’s anticipating what I’m going to do next.”

20. “Constantly worrying about sucking too hard/not hard enough/accidental teeth, plus the most awkward situation of my mouth being busy but not my brain. So I’m sitting there with this weird fleshy thing in my mouth like ‘…I can’t see anything but pubes… he’s not doing anything, am I doing this right?… this smells weird.’”

21. “I was almost twenty and he was my first boyfriend. He goes to an extremely conservative Christian college that does not allow women to be in the men’s dorms overnight, so we were sleeping in the backseat of my car in a deserted corner of the parking lot. We’d had sex before, but never oral. As horny as we were that night, we knew from experience that trying to bang in my back seat would be difficult, cramped, exhausting, and likely to get us caught. (The story of how I lost my virginity.) But a blowjob we could get away with. I volunteered, but warned him that I was clueless and would need help. He guided me through it very kindly and helpfully, giving me pointers on how to lick and suck the way he particularly liked it. He has an ex that we was with for a long time and was sexually active with, which normally bothers me a little, but that night it was helpful because he was able to be specific on how to angle his dick into the side of my mouth so I could deep-throat without choking or biting too hard. He said it was fine if it scraped against my molars a little bit. He gave all this advice in a low, gentle voice and stroked my hair. It was actually really nice. Once I’d gotten the hang of it, he started pushing my head down, which messed up my rhythm a little, but I get off on being controlled during sex so it was kind of hot. I still ask him to do that sometimes. When he came, I only knew because he warned me — I didn’t realize that the taste in my mouth was cum until after I swallowed. He didn’t expect that. I gave him a weird look and asked him what the hell else he expected me to do with it. Spit it out on the floor of my car? He reciprocated via fingers (cunnilingus proved a bit too difficult in the car) and we fell asleep cuddled up in the backseat. We’re still together. All in all, a very pleasant first blowjob experience.”

22. “I got nauseous and gagged a lot. He said it was okay if I stopped. Then I started crying because I’d wanted to do something special for his birthday (we’d been dating about two months at that point) and he said it was fine and we’d try some other time.”

Got my period two days later. My period makes me nauseous and weepy. Many a-ha’s were a-ha’d. (I did end up successfully completing a blowjob like two months later. My general reaction was “wow, this is really sour and kind of savory, it’s not salty at all.”)”

23. “Awful… for him. I had braces and I’m still not sure why he would knowingly accept a metal BJ. He soon learned it was not a good idea when a part of the band on my molar met his dick.”

24. It was with my ex-boyfriend 3 years ago. I was a virgin at that time. My ex-boyfriend was 3 years older than me and had a good star boy vibe too.

It was my first time touching a dick. felt so heavy and warm. When I start giving him the hand job, it suddenly got hard like a rock but went soft again. When It got soft a droplet of precum came out of his penis top. I got so horny by witnessing that. I licked it, it was slippery and salty, OMG I loved it. I wanted more precum, so I pulled out all my strength and started sucking out his dick. I felt that salty liquid, Yes he is a precum machine. He got rock hard again, I was on my work, mining out all his precum up to the last drop. Suddenly he started moaning and I felt his dick was getting fat and harder. This dude squirted out all his cum, which I had never tasted in my mouth. It was more like precum but was warm.

25. I was immature to say the least and lied to him when he asked me if I had ever sucked cocks before… it’s the reason I still crave the cock sucking as soon as I put his cock in my mouth I had a climax but at the time had no clue what it was but it happened once more when he squirted his cum in my mouth… I thought he had just peed in my mouth till he said swallow the cum so there would be no mess in his car for his wife to find…. I waited till he dropped me off to get sick and throw up… When he asked me 3 days later to do it again I could not wait and I never have gotten sick since.

26. Tonight was the night for me. My boyfriend and I, we have been together for a year and a half and we celebrated today with a great dinner and a great loving session after.

Although we don’t want to go into sex yet, we have been doing some other things and two months ago it was my first handjob on him.

Tonight tho, I asked him if I could kiss him down there. And he smiled.

I went down kissing his chest and then started to move my boobs on him. He was super excited. When he was almost coming, I put it in my mouth and he held my head with his hands as if he was liking it. No longer than 30 seconds after, he came in my mouth. It was a weird feeling, having a penis in your mouth is weird but I was liking it even though I was confused. When he came, I was amazed and not sure about what to do so I swallowed it. He couldn’t believe it. It was amazing and we both loved it.

27. I was so proud! I had studied books on the subject and watched a few porn videos. Then, I discussed it with my boyfriend. He was so supportive, and let me know that if I were uncomfortable with the idea of putting a penis in my mouth, that he would understand and not expect it.

Finally, I decided that I would try it. In fact, a co-worker who said that she was an expert, always said, “Try it – you’ll like it.” So I told my BF that I wanted to give it a try.

He took me to our favorite restaurant for a delicious meal, and even got us some fine wine – for liquid courage. Later, at his apartment, he again asked if I were still sure that it was something that I wanted. At that time, I wanted nothing more than to get on my knees before him!

The actual act was much better than I expected. He offered suggestions, and waned me that he was about to cum. I had gone this far, so I pulled him closer, and would not let him pull out. I swallowed every drop, and still do!

28. From all my sexual experiences at first I’m always a bit nervous in my head bc I have to think about it and figure out my first move while beginning to suck. When I start I always close my eyes to relax my nerves because it’s always my first time especially doing it with someone new. But after I start feeling like he’s liking it, I get comfortable and begin doing some sexy tricks with my tongue 😅. Sooner or later he’ll tell me he’s about to cum or when he starts breathing harder I tend to get myself prepared for it. As soon as he does it, It’s like my blood rushes through the inside of my skin and the taste of his sperm in my mouth gets all salty and thick with a light chemically taste that fills my mouth like a donut 😩 and it makes me feel good that he climaxed and I’ve made him do that with my wonderful mouth and tongue.

29. The first time I did it I was very nervous and didn’t like it. The second time was on a guy I met at a party. That was a ten-second wonder. After that I found ways to enjoy it. Later I took a class in it! Seriously! Honestly, if my vagina sealed itself up somehow I would specialize in oral sex. It’s something my bisexual husband and I compare notes in and share techniques! LOL!

30. My first was awkward and a bit surreal, I was deeply in love with the guy and I was fairly young and still in high school. I had read about sex and saw everything there was to see from tons of foreign and domestic porn that my best friend and I would watch after she found the secret hiding place her father used to keep it, he had every type of porn known to man and on sleep overs we certainly got our fill in her little hide away in the basement we called our nest. I used to see lots of blowjobs and oral sex on those old video tapes though I was not eager to really try it out. However my boyfriend was begging for it so much that one day I did attempt it with him in his parents garage, it was very awkward and I did not like or even realize there would be scents or odors and taste that were not really appetizing or to my liking at that time of my life, I was so afraid that I was not doing it well but he did instruct me in a pleasant and loving way, it did not take him long and without warning he lost what felt like gallons of his manhood in my mouth, I coughed and gagged and he held my head strongly against his tummy forcing himself into my mouth to where I felt like I would not be able to breathe again, when it was over I threw up on his shoes and his pants and ran to clean up, after a couple more times I began to adore pleasuring him but the first couple times were very rough on me.

31. I was 14 and went to a private Baptist school and it was just me and the preacher’s son in the gym that day and on a bullshit bet he told me if he made a full court shot one handed I had to do whatever he wanted. Well he made it and he wanted me to suck his dick and I did and have enjoyed giving head ever since 30 years later.

32. Odd especially since I was pretty young. I was 10 and was pretty dense and reserved back then. I was with some friends and one of them was 16 (Maybe older). Things escalated and I was dared to suck his dick. Not wanting to be the shy one out I agreed. We went to another room and he showed me his penis. He was pretty big if I remember correctly. I was only able to fit his penis half way. He tasted bitter and salty. To be honest I kinda liked it. The feeling of doing something naughty like that. He then came in my mouth without warning. That tasted even saltier and I kinda didn’t like it but he held my head and his penis in so I swallowed it. He told me to lick him clean so I did. At the time it wasn’t an overly traumatic event but in hindsight was pretty stupid.

33. I was nervous, and the guy was giving me directions while I was on my own. He kept telling me that I was using too many teeth, then I got the hang of it. He was starting to really enjoy it until he decided to shove more stuff in to make me choke. For me it was the most difficult, fortunately with practice I improved a lot.

34. I was nervous but excited to do it. I had practiced on my dildo many times, so I was excited to try it for real and make the boy feel good. I wanted to impress him with my skills. But I was nervous that I wouldn’t do it how he liked. He came pretty quick, so I must have done a good job. Either that or just seeing me do it made him cum fast.

I met my husband when we were 11 years old at school but didn’t start dating till we were 13. We kissed, cuddled and ‘played’ with each other and when we were 14 he went down on me and I returned the favor. I can remember whilst I was giving him a BJ, all I was thinking was “Is this really in my mouth?” I did stop before he came in my mouth and I finished him off by hand. Because I was so scared of getting pregnant we were have foreplay long before ‘full sex’ and it wasn’t long before I let him cum in my mouth.

I was surprised that I actually enjoyed it, more so because we were a couple rather than a one night stand. It give me a sense of bonding with him. Anyway, we’re 34 now and 21 years later I still enjoy pleasuring him and have honed my skills to an absolute art.

35. AWKWARD. I was 14 at the time and I had been rather sexually aware for a couple years. I met up with a guy called “S” who I had been talking to online for 6 months or so (he was 17) and we went to a secluded park where before I knew it we were making out. It was kind of a blur and I couldn’t tell if he liked it or not as I was inexperienced and very nervous. He came which was a plus!

36. My first time I felt scared and confused. I was 16, he was 18. He liked it but when we and by that I mean, he, was done I felt lonely and used. Subsequent experiences did get better but I never felt 100% comfortable with it until 2 years ago when I began having sex the most wonderful man I have ever known. He’s now my fiancé. With him I feel beautiful and sexy and loved no matter what kind of sex we’re having at that moment. It’s so much better! I love sucking his dick and swallowing his cum.

37. I practiced up ahead of time with cucumbers, carrots, and bananas until I figured out how to get something like that in my mouth without triggering natural reflexes to spit it out or gag on it. I got to where I could almost skin the peel off a cucumber before I dared actually try it on him.

That evening, I (we) had started playing around with one another, and I have to admit, I had as much fun playing with his penis, pulling on it, slapping on it, bending it, pinching it, and even biting it before I went for it. He was practically ready to cum before I got it in my mouth good and proper. I was having the time of my life, until he did. That sudden explosion of gook was more than I could handle. My first thought of it was a time when I had been sick and coughing up a thick and pasty phlegm. The thought of that almost made me nauseous.

I still to this day have a problem when he unloads in my mouth. I don’t mind it when he pulls out and splatters it all over my face. Even if he gets a few droplets of it in my mouth, it doesn’t bother me. It’s not the taste of it, it’s the amount and the texture of it. YUK!

38. My first – It was great, but it was very tiring! I had slept over at his house and then we were in bed watching a movie and cuddling. After we both fell asleep, in the middle of the night I woke up a few times and kept holding him, then I gradually went down and felt him up a lot of times. He was sleeping peacefully and he kept getting hard since I was rubbing it. He woke up and asked me if I was trying to feel him up lol and I said “Noooo…” and then we kissed a little, talked, went back to sleep and I went back at it. Then in the morning I woke him up and he was so turned on because of last night and I did it again, he took his pants off because I asked him to and I gave him a hand job, then he asked if I wanted it in my mouth and I put it in and he instructed me how he liked the grip, pressure, etc. He wanted it to last very long, to me it felt like an hour and I think it was. I loved watching him squirm around and go crazy as he was about to cum. I swallowed. We planned that I’d show him the come in my mouth but I just could not keep it in there too long because the taste surprised me. It was a warm, salty tangy taste and I had to swallow immediately and drink water but I enjoyed every minute of it. He loved it because I loved it.

39. Felt awesome. I had no clue what I was doing but made him feel great. I was told that I was the best and wasn’t believed when I said it was my first time. I rocked it.

40. It was awkward, my jaw started hurting, I didn’t know what to do, then he shot this hot, thick, bitter liquid down the back of my throat and I started choking lol!!!! I am a pro at it now though.

42. I was scared to see a penis from that angle for the first time! It was just… so close to my face. But once I started, I loved it instantly.

43. “‘Holy shit, what am I doing?’

‘Whoa, this is awesome!’

‘I love cock!’

‘I’m-a deep-throat this thang!’

‘Oops, I’ve thrown up…’”

Spit or Swallow?

Thirty-eight women talk about whether they will spit out cum or swallow it after a blowjob. Compiled by Spurtz.

38 women talking about spit or swallow after blowjobs

1. Well the whole point is to make it hot. The key to giving a great blowjob is to have passion and enthusiasm. Convincing him that we are enjoying it much more than he is. Right? Right. So the reason I take a facial or let him cum in my mouth (and show him how it drips down my chin) is to give him the ultimate pleasure while building him up to a toe curling orgasm. That’s what it’s about. Does that make any sense? 

2. Naw we LOVE IT. Ik I do. I can’t wait ‘til my boo gets off of work tonight and slap it in my face. I’ve recently experienced this for the first time and I think I’m addicted. I’ve sucked a penis and tasted cum before but never swallowed and never had it in my face until now. I love being submissive to him. I love being in control.

3. Pleases men. In my mouth is fine if I like you.

4. Some women not only enjoy it but need it in order to feel beautiful. If you never cum on their face, they may conclude that you consider them ugly.

5. I never swallow unless I’m in love, and I’ve never been in love.

6. A lady never spits!

7. It’s rude not to swallow…when doing it you swallow a little pre-cum anyway. I always thought it’s rude to not swallow because you’re saying he is nasty LOL.

8. Ugh I HATE doing this…but my husband would love if I did it more…it’s SO yucky….

9. I gulp all the goo that I can. Then I suck every drop out of my mate until he is dry.

10. The one and only time I tried—I threw up in the sink.

11. I swallow just because I like it. I find it a turn on to swallow rather than spit. I wouldn’t want him to be making spitting and gagging sounds when he was working on me.

12. I’ve done both. Actually depends on what it tastes like. I’ve had an old boyfriend cum in my mouth, it tasted vile and I promptly spat it out running to the bathroom to hurl. Never did that again….I’ve also swallowed. My current partner has cum that doesn’t have any taste regardless of what he eats and so I take pleasure from it and sure as hell he does too!

13. I do it because he like it and no I don’t like the taste—sometimes I gag but I swallow with a smile.

14. Dudes can be effing weird when in comes to head. Honestly, does it make any difference at all whether a chick swallows while give head as long as you cum? Whether a chick swallows is her business. You ought to feel fortunate she’s giving you head.
15. I don’t even know if I should be answering this, and girls are probably all going to thumbs down me, but I’m definitely a swallower. Why? Because if you deep-throat and swallow, you barely taste anything. Yeah, yeah, I know, TMI, but it’s true! It’s the best way to avoid a mess and the icky taste.

16. I never ever swallow, i have done so in the past and hate it, too salty and smells like chlorine! I enjoy giving oral sex and don’t need flavored lube to do it, the little drops don’t bother me, it’s the whole load that I can’t stand. The texture, the taste, the horrible after taste, I have a weak stomach at the best of times, then I end up burping and re-living the initial swallow all over again. Thankfully hubby is very understand so always warns me and catches it himself.
17. Try to get him to cut salt out of his diet!! I swallow when it’s not lumpy and salty…but most of the time I can’t!!.. and I find its mainly due to his diet habits!! Get him to drink more fluids too! Lol!

18. Semen tastes quite disgusting, while it does vary from person to person and is pretty diet dependent, but I’ve never in my life found semen that actually tasted good….FI would love it if I would finish him off with a bj and I swallowed, he also knows that the taste just makes me gag and causes me to be queasy afterwards. Since he’s not willing to subside off of only fruit and yogurt, he isn’t exactly going to press the subject….Not everyone is willing to do it, I second the option of having him cum on your tits or something instead, men seem to love that just as much.

19. Blurgh! the taste makes me gag just imagining it! When we first got together I did all the time, then as you get on a bit I was like, hell no! At first I wanted to please you, now I wanna like u lol. If I do do it, I do have a drink, but it’s the taste after you have just swallowed, its horrific! God bless you ladies who grin and bear it, you’re a bigger lady than me! Blurgh! lol. Thanks for the laugh girlies.

20. I swallow only when I am severely hammered, which is rare…or I am feeling generous. I dont like his taste. I don’t really like the feeling it gives in the back of my throat. I feel like gagging now just thinking about it…

21. I just hate the taste of cum and the thought of it being alive with a million little things swimming makes me want to puke even when I think about it! I can only do a Bj if I am drunk which is never!

22. I swallow it because I like the taste and texture of it number one. Number two is because guys like it when we swallow it, seems to be a turn on for them…and lastly would seem a bit awkward to have to excuse myself for a moment to spit it out or whatever, then return for my turn at getting satisfied. Just keep breathing through your nose.

23. I never swallow. The smell alone makes me gag a little. He loves to cum in my mouth, but I spit it out immediately afterwards. If I don’t I will throw up. The few times that I have swallowed, I couldn’t stand the way it felt on the back of my throat. It was very mucousy, and no matter how many times I swallowed or how much water I drank, I couldn’t get the feeling to go away. It’s like snot at the back of my throat that won’t go down. DH was concerned at first that I thought he was gross, but I’ve assured him that it’s just me and my stupid gag reflex. He doesn’t take it personally anymore.

24. Oral is mostly foreplay, but every so often I’ll blow him just because I like blowing him, and yes I swallow. It’s not like cinnamon-buns tasty, but it’s not bad, and I don’t mind it.

25. I swallow because I enjoy swallowing. I like everything about it. I’m an oral sex fan and a cum-swallowing fan. The taste is almost always good and sometimes it’s great. Sweet cum is best, but salty cum is good too. Sometimes there’s almost no flavor at all and I’m disappointed with that. Texture wise my husband’s cum is almost always thick and creamy which I like very much. Rarely it’s watery and that is also disappointing to the point of being shocking to me when it happens. I swallow no matter what and I always tell him it was good. If it was better than usual I do my tony the tiger impression and tell him it was great. Sex is very mental and I wouldn’t want to put any negative thoughts into his head!

26. I swallow. Less mess.

27. Honestly, I swallow my man’s cum because it is a part of him. I mean if you are headed downtown on a man and you are not willing to accept that he will shoot a wad of cum, then why go down at all? I can’t think of anything more degrading to a man than have his chick spit out or not accept his essence. If you are sucking it in the first place…be prepared to slurp and swallow ladies…

28. I swallow, and I’m dang proud of it 🙂 It’s pretty nasty, but you get used to it after a while. I truly, actually swallow…and yes, my man does kiss me after, but after a few seconds usually. I’ve always found that kind of odd though.

29. Oh my I’m queasy just talking about it LOL. I don’t think I’d ever be able to do this without throwing up and totally ruining the moment.

30. I cannot stand the consistency of cum. It makes me gag and vomit. If he cums in my mouth, I spat it out on a dirty shirt or something cause I will be sick if I don’t. I have only swallowed 2 times and that was when we first started dating lol almost 4 years ago.

31. I threw in the towel on swallowing when it ended up coming out of my nose. That was the end of that LOL.

32. OK, honestly…I think it tastes like crap and prefer not to swallow it. I have done it before, usually because it’s a turn on for my man, never because it tastes good. From what I can tell it tastes a bit like bleach, you know the smell? that’s pretty much what it tastes like.

33. Yep every single time. Have him drink pineapple juice and skip onions and garlic. Makes all the difference in the world.

34. I myself swallow. I am submissive and not only do it as part of the lifestyle but I do it to make my men happy because I know it is a big turn-on for them. There is a kinky and taboo aspect as well so that also makes me want to do it even more.

35. I actually USED to swallow. But one time when I was going down on DH (then BF) he didn’t warn me and I deep throated at the same time that he was about to cum and it made me gag so then it all came out my nose, swimmers and all. It was the most disgusting thing in the world I hated the taste to begin with. Reminds me of dandelions) and that just made it worse. So from then on he is not allowed to cum in my mouth. But because he no longer does that I enjoy giving him BJs even more so he gets them ALL.THE.TIME. And because of our mutual understanding I don’t need to worry about that nasty taste and so I can go all crazy!

36. Don’t really care about the taste…he likes it, it’s less messy so why not? Sorry nothing really erotic about it for me. Besides he’s willing to go down on me and get all messy…I’m not gonna be stuck up about something that doesn’t bother me to begin with.

37. I would think that everyone was taught from a young age that it’s rude for girls to spit. And honestly, what is the point in spitting? I mean its already there why wouldn’t you swallow it? That’s like getting a bite of chocolate and chewing it up then spitting it out. And please tell me why anyone would think its so sexy to garbled cum and let it run down your chin? To me, that’s a big waste. Letting even one tiny little drop of that hot, thick, creamy, delicious cum go to waste should be crime. So ladies if you’re gonna do a job be a real woman and finish it. SPITTERS ARE QUITTERS!!!!! So drink up.

38. No—too salty!

First Time Seeing Ejaculation

Forty-five women comment about seeing men ejaculate for the first time.

Compiled by Spurtz

Women comment on first time seeing men ejaculate

1. To be honest I thought it made their orgasm look sort of ridiculous and silly. I thought it would happen slower and more sensually. Made me think male sexuality as more mechanical than I had before. Overall I think I just pitied him because it just looked so stupid and weird.

2. “Oh that looks like snot…” combined with “look I did a thing!!! Yay me!!!”

3. For some reason I thought it was going to be entirely liquid. Too much smut, I guess.

4. Is it supposed to look like it’s puking mayonnaise?

5. “Please don’t get it on my shirt, my mother will kill me.”

6. I just realized I’ve never actually seen it in the five years I’ve been having sex and giving blow jobs.

7. “HEHEHE IT’S LIKE A TINY FOUNTAIN” was, I believe, my exact thought.

8. I didn’t expect it to go so damn far. I thought it was supposed to just dribble out!

9. I pretty much thought “well that was not a lot…” porn lied

10. I have no idea. It wasn’t all that noteworthy.

11. “Wow.” It was incredibly exciting and super hot.

12. “That’s it?” LOL

13. “Wow….um…did that hurt?” I stumbled upon a porn movie when I was ten. I didn’t see the splatter, but I saw the guy from the chest up while he was finishing up. He did a lot of groaning and heaving and grunting and I genuinely thought he was in pain.

14. Shock, really. I was giving a handjob and didn’t know that men could actually come like they did in porn videos. I didn’t think to shield myself with one hand and I was soaked.

15. I don’t really recall it to be honest so it can’t have been anything earth shattering.

16. That’s kinda weird.

17. I don’t remember but probably along the lines of ‘Oh, I thought there would be so much more.’

18. Well it was during a blowjob and he didn’t warn me, so I just swallowed and looked shocked. I was surprised it was so warm.

19. I may have laughed or was just staring in silence. I can’t remember. It’s just not a thing you’re really prepared to see. It’s really silly looking to be honest.

20. When it wasn’t a guy I was into I just thought, oh wow, he came, yahoo. 🙂 But when it was a guy I was regularly sleeping with, I thought Let me HELP you with that 😉

21. “Bloody hell, that went a long way!”

22. “Oh. That’s how it happens?”

23. That’s kind of gross. And yet, hot.”

24. In person? I giggled like an idiot. Harharhar, omg semen! I’ve since grown up and only grin when he cums.

25. Gross….what does it taste like? And to follow that it didn’t taste too bad but he needed more fruit in his life, though

26. … Volcano.

27. “Finally! Holy hell that’s hot!” I have always been extremely aroused by the idea, and similarly the reality. Sex is just not sex if I don’t get it in one part of me or another.

28. I guess I was expecting something more dazzling?

29. I thought it was supposed to shoot out extra fast and far.

30. “That was easy.”

31. First time? 17th October 2010; two days after getting with my crush. We were making out in the back seat of his car and he invited me to feel his hard on. So I did, through his underwear. Then I decided to stroke it, still through his underwear. At some point he told me he’d blow his load if I kept going, and I was like “So?” and kept going till he came. I’m not entirely sure he was prepared for that, or entirely comfortable with it; I DID kinda take him by surprise after all.

How did I feel? I felt awesome. It was so evil of me to make him come in his pants like that, without his permission. But I loved it and he loved it (though we both agreed I was “evil”, hahaha). It’s an awesome feeling being able to make someone else orgasm…

32. The following are responses to the question: Can you feel it when your partner ejaculates inside you? Does it feel good?

33. I can only speak from my experience. I have felt it once – the sensation of something coming out of my husband’s penis. Was it pleasurable? No, it was weird. It felt like someone peeing on my insides. On other occasions, I have felt his penis pulsate while ejaculating. That felt good, not great because I knew sex was pretty much over at that point, but good. I know some women don’t ever feel anything like that. It helps to be really excited and if you want your woman to feel these things, you can’t pound into her like crazy, it has to be slower and easy. Personally, I prefer it that way but I know some men just go for it.

34. I’m sure it differs with each woman, but from my experience, it is easily felt when a man ejaculates inside the vagina. It is a very interesting feeling, but the pleasure experienced is purely emotional.

35. If you mean do we feel the fluid moving, no. The exciting and sometimes erotic part of it is feeling the rest of his body react as he ejaculates. Women can definitely feel muscle tenseness, wherever it may occur.

36. It all depends on the man and how powerful his ejaculation is. Sometimes it feels like a pulsation and sometimes it feels like nothing. Usually, you can feel it if a man hasn’t had sex in a while.

37. Yes. And yes. With only one qualification: If the amount of sperm is tiny and doesn’t really gush out, I have noticed nothing. However, I suspect that may be a very individual and not at all representative answer. I really do not know if other women feel a man ejaculate.

38. It depends on the situation. From personal experience, sans condom, I have been able to feel my boyfriend’s ejaculation. At other times I couldn’t. It can be a pleasurable feeling, I guess. It feels like hot wet juice hitting your insides.

39. It definitely depends on whether the guy is wearing a condom. Sometimes the man’s penis will jerk when he ejaculates, and the woman can feel that, but it is often difficult to detect if the man is wearing a condom. If he doesn’t wear a condom, it’s a lot easier because you’re suddenly inundated with messy gooey stuff, you know?

40. Is it pleasurable? You’ll get a different answer with different reasons from every woman. It’s only been within the past five years that I’ve realized I can ‘tune in’ to the sensations in my vagina. I’ve had three lovers in that time, one of which had a very powerful ejaculation. I could feel it, but it didn’t really do much for me. It merely meant the end of our romp. My last boyfriend had a very watery ejaculation. I could not feel it, and it generally tended to be very messy. My current boyfriend’s penis swells before he ejaculates. I can feel his ejaculation, and it has, on occasion, been the cause of my orgasm. I’m not certain this progression was entirely due to the differences in the men. I’ve explored my sexuality in the last five years and have come to enjoy the mental and emotional aspects of a healthy sex life. My boyfriend’s ejaculation excites me in more than just a physical way.

41. I’m not sure they’re going to allow me to say this, but yes, a woman can feel pulsing when the penis is ejaculating – or at least that is what is feels like from my point of view.

42. I can definitely feel when my husband ejaculates inside of me. Right before he does, his penis sort of vibrates and then I can feel the semen. It feels like warm water…but only briefly. There isn’t enough to really feel the sensation of something gushing. However, I do feel it and it is a wonderful feeling…this is very different for each person though…hope it helps!

43. Yes women can feel a man ejaculating in them. I know that I can it feels all warm and a sudden rush of wetness. I like it and find it makes me feel closer to my husband.

44. You know what honestly, I’ve probably felt a guy ejaculate like 5 times but barely….And when I did feel it It was pleasurable… not physically but like mentally/emotionally…to know that we were both cumming at the same time. But besides those few time I’ve never really felt it… although I do have female friends that tell me they feel it every time…So I guess the answer is every female is different.

45. Until recently, I never could feel when he ejaculated in me. When I would use my hand on him, I could feel it. But now I can tell he’s ejaculating because his penis will pulsate inside of me. But as far as the sperm feeling good inside or whatever, no.

Ladies of Sex270, give us your experiences to these two questions; 1. What were your thoughts the first time you saw a penis ejaculate and 2, can you feel it when a partner ejaculates inside you?


As you may or may not know, Steamworks in Berkley, California, as well as other major cities, is what’s known as a ‘bathhouse.’ Although ostensibly gay, plenty of bisexual men spend time there.

It is a plain looking building on the outside, but it has a sauna, hot tub, showers, gym facilities, many small rooms equipped with beds and TV sets hooked to in-house porn channels, a large play area equipped with everything from glory holes to slings, and some general milling around areas. One can rent one of the little rooms for 8 hours, hang out with guys, and do pretty much whatever you can imagine, and probably some things you can’t imagine also.

Men Playing Twister at a Steamworks, Gay Bathhouse Booth at Market Days
Men playing Twister in the Steamworks Both at the Market Days celebration

When you arrive, you are given a basket to store your clothes, or one of the 50 or so little rooms, depending on how much you want to pay.

Most of the men walk around with towels wrapped around their groins. They want to hook up for anything from handjobs to anal intercourse. Safe play is encouraged with sanitizer and condoms freely available.

These guys could end up walking around for an hour or more depending on how shy they are.

Every now and then, you’ll see a guy boldly walking around fully naked, and sometimes, but rarely, even sporting an erection.

As your eyes adapt to the darkness and you’ve wandered around a bit, you’ll see some activities. An open door to a dimly lit room where a guy is wanking on a bed. Or, a couple of guys at a glory hole, doing what guys do at glory holes.

The first time I visited Steamworks, I was just like the others, walking around shyly with a towel, until finally a guy invited me into a little room.

He wanted to kiss and buttfuck. I wasn’t into it, and let him know. He wasn’t terribly disappointed, as he politely told me he was looking for someone else.

I wandered around some more. I wasn’t in a hurry. Your $17 buys a room for 8 whole hours. Finally, I came across a small Asian fellow to whom I explained that I only wanted to give or get a testicle massage – a thing that had been fascinating me for a while.

He was delighted, and we went to my room. First, I was playing porn videos on the TV, but they weren’t very interesting compared to the action at hand, so I turned off the TV. Soon, he was fondling my balls like a pro, doing exactly what I wanted. He was squeezing firmly, but not painfully. I had planned to spend my whole eight hours at Steamworks, but I ejaculated with this guy’s skinny little fingers working my balls like that. I came without him even touching my dick. I asked what he wanted in return, and to my delight, he didn’t want anything, and we parted ways.

I had hoped to stay longer, but as a guy, you probably know that feeling one can get, when enough is enough after a good hard orgasm. So, I put on my clothes and left, totally satisfied.

Having been back several times, always with equally nice, but longer-lasting experiences, I became enough of an expert to know how to better control the situation. The part I didn’t like as much was the long cruising period before I could find some action. I finally figured out to just throw the towel over my shoulder and walk proudly naked, and sometimes erect around the facility.

Now, some guys leave the doors to their little rooms open in obvious invitation. One guy I remember had his open butt up in the air, just waiting for a stranger to come along and stick something in his anus.

That’s not for me. I decided to be bold in my own way, and it works wonders. I went to a narrow hallway that’s wider in one area, where there are four chairs against one wall, facing four video screens on the other wall. Everyone has to walk through the hallway to get from the front to the back areas of the building, so there’s a lot of traffic. It averages perhaps four men per minute. The screens are playing videos, both gay and heterosexual stuff. They aren’t great videos in my opinion, but that’s not the point. I took my towel off, and started fondling my erect penis, right there in front of everyone. It did the trick almost immediately. Guys would sit down next to me, and offer to help me with my fondling.

I would explain exactly what I want: Handjob and related activities: Yes. Blowjob, anal, frotting, kissing: No.

Some guys would politely leave for activity more to their liking, but probably 60% would be almost relieved to participate at the level I like.

Within minutes we’d be in a little room.

So, that’s how to work Steamworks.

A couple of things I’ll try the next time I’m there. There’s a wall facing the hot tub which I won’t get in. It’s not that I’m afraid of disease. I’m afraid of all the super-intense chemicals they probably use to fight disease. The wall has four open shower heads. I’d like to show myself with an erection, maybe jerking, right there in front of the six or so guys who are typically in the hot tub, and all the guys walking around.

I’d like to use the facilities in the exercise room. I haven’t paid much attention, but it seems all the guys in there are wearing towels. I’m sure it’s OK not to wear a towel, they just don’t realize it, or maybe they’re actually focused on exercising.

Become a Hero

How to be a hero and truly save lives.

The Education of Achilles by Auguste-Clément Chrétien

Literally millions of people have died or had miserable lives after sexual encounters. They have had to deal with anything from unwanted pregnancies to Covid-19, monkeypox, herpes, AIDS, and other sexually-transmitted diseases.

So what if you, as an individual, could prevent some of these unfortunate consequences?

You can, and it’s super-easy to do. You don’t have to rush into a burning building to be a hero. You don’t have to jump into a freezing cold lake. You don’t have to endure physical suffering. In fact, it’s the opposite of painful. While you’re being a hero, you can have a ton of fun.

What in the heck could I possibly be talking about?

I’m talking about promoting masturbation. When people wank, they feel less horny. If they masturbate freely, without guilt, they can feel more satisfied with their lives. They don’t have to seek out other people, some of which may not be right for them, just for sexual satisfaction. They don’t have to drive anywhere, spend money on dinners, work out scheduling, and then have to compromise what they want with what someone else wants. No, they can simply masturbate at home, and have a great time.

Many people don’t really realize this. Or, they’re confused with stigma, guilt, and other crazy and incorrect societally-inflicted concerns.

This is where you come in. Promote masturbation, and you’ll be a genuine hero, saving lives, and reducing suffering.

How do you promote masturbation? Anyway you want. It can be as simple as talking about masturbation with your friends, family and co-workers. Write about it in blogs and posts. Or, it can be as sophisticated as arranging masturbation workshops, meetings or parties.

Alright, enough talk. Go out there and become a hero!

Women’s First Reactions to a Hard Cock

Women’s First Reactions to a Hard Cock

Compiled by Spurtz

A compendium found on various sites on the net of women’s first reactions to a hard cock.

1. “I thought the balls were in separate sacks.”

2. “I don’t know why, but before I saw one I’d assumed a penis became erect still pointing down. I’d never seen any porn or anything and yeah, I figured sex would be a logistical nightmare. In my head, when I saw it pointing up, I was kind of like ‘ohhhhhh that totally makes sense now!’

3.”I wanted to slap it just to see if it would go back to its original position. It did.”

4. “I was expecting something twice the size, glistening and golden.”

5. “It looks like an alien worm.”

6. One woman was so unimpressed that she thought the wool was being pulled over her eyes when she saw a penis for the first time. “I’m 99% sure this is a prank,” she thought.

7. Others joked that their first responses were, “Is that supposed to be hot?” and “Damn that’s ugly,” with many women very underwhelmed by what they were looking at. Rather than finding out in the bedroom the hard way, this woman stumbled across more than she bargained for whilst browsing the web as a kid. She said: “I was about ten and saw it on the Internet. Thought it was a diseased finger.”

8. “Everyone’s always sobbing over the fact that dudes who watch too much porn develop a warped outlook on sex and how women should behave in bed and whatnot. But no one’s worried about the expectations women have about penis size from watching dirty videos featuring 10-inch dicks—and they probably should be. The first time I reached into my ninth grade boyfriend’s pants to give him a handjob, I was shocked by what wasn’t there. I even looked down to check that he was actually erect. He was.”

9. “My super bohemian parents have always insisted on walking around our house naked. So the first penis I was exposed to was my dad’s. Usually I’d see it when it was flaccid. But one day I walked into my parents’ bedroom when I was about five, and when my dad got up to go to the bathroom, I saw this thing protruding straight out from between his legs. He had a raging boner, but I had no idea about the whole morning wood thing yet. So I screamed, ‘Daddy, there’s a snake eating your penis!’ Haven’t been able to live that one down.”

10. “I didn’t perform oral sex on a guy until I was in college, at which point I was embarrassed because I couldn’t participate in conversations about dicks with my girlfriends. So I got wasted one night, determined to give head for the first time. It wasn’t all that (excuse the pun) hard to find a willing partner. But the guy I ended up in bed with had what I now know by comparison to be a giant penis. Twenty seconds into my attempt to deep throat, I vomited all over him. It was so traumatizing, I waited another year before trying again.”

11. “I was one of those girls who was ahead of her time, sexually. I developed early, and I had urges, you know. Raging teenage hormones! After I gave my first handy at 11, I became fascinated by penises. I thought they were so cool, the way grew and pulsated and responded to my touch. I wanted to see as many as I could as quickly as possible. As you can imagine, I was very popular for a while.”

12. “For a long time, I was shy about boys and sex. In high school, I promised my boyfriend of six months that if he officially asked me to prom, we could move on from dry humping to some more exciting stuff. I was terrified of the images of penises I’d seen from Googling, but I figured I’d have to take the leap at some point. Unfortunately, when my boyfriend unzipped his pants and whipped it out for the first time, all my fears were confirmed. I actually covered my eyes and started crying because I wanted nothing to do with that rocket ship shaped thing, but I’d promised him I’d put my mouth on it for at least 30 seconds. He was a nice guy and didn’t make me go through with it. We’re Facebook friends to this day.”

13. “When I was a teen, I was pretty embarrassed about my vagina. I mean, they don’t really give young girls any education in the what-your-vagina-might-look like department. Now I know there’s a spectrum of possibilities, but back then I just assumed mine was weird. Well, the first time I got naked with a boy, at 16, I did what anyone who was utterly relieved they weren’t the only one with funny looking genitalia would do: I laughed out loud. Then I watched, with fascination, as his erection died. Whoops.”

14. “I was so eager to go down on a guy for the first time—you know, it was just time to cross that sexual to-do off the list. So I approached the quarterback of the football team at the Winter Wonderland dance and whispered in his ear that I wanted to give him head. Obviously, he consented. I pulled his pants down in the backseat of his Jeep Cherokee and watched him lean back and smile as I did my thing (I’d watched a few Jenna Jameson videos online for tips). I was no expert, but I quickly realized that that didn’t really matter. I could tickle it with my tongue and use my hands and I loved feeling like I had so much power over a guy that way.”

15. “Penises are weird. I’ve felt that way since the day I saw my first boyfriend naked, and I maintain that stance. It’s not the sausage part that bothers me as much as the nuts. Nuts? Why do we even call them that? They’re more like nuts encased in gelatinous sacs of wrinkly, bumpy flesh lined with prickly pubic hair. I’d die happy if I never touched another pair of balls again. Too bad I’m not a lesbian, I guess.”

16. “For years, I never really appreciated the naked male body. I was simultaneously mystified and borderline repulsed by it. But when my current boyfriend first stripped for me in his dorm room and stood there, all vulnerable with his junk hanging out, I didn’t just fall in love with him – I fell for his penis. I seriously think it’s the most beautiful thing. I like seeing it and feeling it in all of its various shapes and sizes. So I’d encourage any girl who’s feels at all put off by cocks to hold on tight, because they’re bound to change their mind as soon as they meet the right guy.”

17. “No matter how many tidbits you hear from your sexually experienced girlfriends, nothing prepares you for the first time you get up close and personal with a man’s package. I threw a party in the basement of my parents’ house while they were away one weekend and when it was my turn to get locked in a closet for ‘seven minutes in heaven,’ I was literally shaking with nerves. I remember feeling poked when he approached. His dick was so hard and terrifyingly unfamiliar. I just wasn’t quite ready yet. Luckily, he was so distracted feeling me up that we didn’t even get past second base before someone knocked on the door.”

18. “I have a theory that girls who say penises are ugly are afraid of coming across as overly sexual or slutty or something. I’ve loved penises since I first became acquainted with them.”

13. “I like ‘em circumcised, uncircumcised, big, average, pink, or brown. I mean, is there another human body part that defies gravity? I can understand why a penis might look weird to a girl at first, but all body parts are pretty weird if you isolate them for long enough. Stare at your foot for five minutes and then tell me dicks are anything but awesome.”

19. “Okay, so when I saw my first penis, I made a little mistake. I was dating someone semi-seriously and one thing led to another and we started fooling around in my bedroom, where we were supposed to be studying. Since the lights were still on I had a really good look when it made its debut and I just sat there, gawking, paralyzed in awe. It’s startling to be confronted by a brand new body part. So the guy said ‘Everything okay?’ and I said, ‘Yes! It’s just so cute!’ Cute. I called a man’s penis cute. The look of absolute terror on the guy’s face taught me never to do that again.”

20. “All my life I thought penises were shaped like road cones. I was absolutely taken aback when I saw one for the first time. I actually didn’t want to touch it because it appeared to be looking at me.”

21. “For some reason I thought dicks were the thickness of pencils. Total shocker.”

22. “I was most surprised about how velvety soft penises are, and THEY CAN FUCKING MOVE!?!?!? Seriously, I stopped, sat up, and stared at his junk for a solid minute demanding he make it twitch because I actually couldn’t believe what I was seeing.”

23. “Being a girl I know there’s only a small space between my vagina and asshole, but for a guy it’s just his asshole then is smooth all the way down to his penis it’s weird I always look for another hole but there’s never going to be one.”

24. “How the skin on ballsacks move, like, when the balls are lowering or retracting I guess (???). It still blows my mind, it looks like a deep-sea mollusk. I remember the first time I got a really close, well-lit look at my boyfriend’s ballsack as the skin on it gracefully shifted in many directions at once. I was so awestruck by its independent motions. I had no idea that any part of a human body could move in this otherworldly manner. I took a close-up video to show him because I wasn’t sure he understood what I was talking about and he got all embarrassed and made me delete it.”

25. “How much fun the balls can be! Yeah, sure, the cock was awesome but the balls fascinated me coz they reminded me of squishy stress balls. You could see them moving around while he stayed motionless! I swear the first experience I had with balls changed my life; I was like a caveman discovering fire.”

26. “How fucking goofy it looks. I can’t imagine why guys send dick pics. Why would you want to show off something that looks so ridiculous? Seriously, just because it feels nice doesn’t mean it’s sexy to look at. I mean, I’m sure vaginas aren’t very pretty either, but I don’t hear complaints about unwanted vag pics.”

27. “How hard dicks get and how floppy and silly they are when soft. It just blows my mind they go from practically mush to a fucking bone in 10 seconds.”

28. “How soft dick is… Other parts of men skin is rough or callous but somehow a dick is fucking baby-skin soft. I was like woahhhh!”

29. “This is dumb but I was surprised at what balls actually looked like. Because of the drawings of penises that people always drew, I assumed there were two little sacks of testicles hanging of either side of the penis, not one sack with two testicles in them, if that makes sense.”

30. “My first time was a game of I’ll show you mine if you show me yours when I was around 5 years old. The boy was not circumcised. Twelve years later, I was losing my virginity. The boy was circumcised. I had no idea what circumcision was, so I assumed that the difference in appearance was due to some sort of change that happens due to puberty. The next 3 dicks I saw were all circumcised. Until, the 4th dick I saw was uncircumcised. I didn’t want to embarrass him by mentioning it and spent months believing that he had an adult-sized child dick. I privately wondered what went wrong with his puberty. One day after we broke up, I mentioned it to a girlfriend, and was educated on circumcision. Felt like an idiot.”

31. “Penises are soft! And velvety. And fun to play with. I had identified as a lesbian for a long time before I met my current SO (who is a man). ’Twas a pleasant bisexual realization.”

32. “Have you ever just watched balls relax and contract while your boyfriend is lying down after sex? It’s so fascinating. I just want to poke them and play with them. The first time I touched an erect penis was through my ex’s skinny jeans when I was 14. It actually felt like wood! Freaked me right out.”

33. “The size difference between soft and hard dick. It went from ‘huh, cute, slightly disappointing tho, kinda looks like a pear’ to ‘oh’ that is SO not gonna fit, really fast.”

34. “The slit in the top of the dick. I assumed it would be more of a little round hole than a slit.”

35. “Penises are really, really gross and ugly. To the point where I almost can’t have sex with the lights on because they freak me out.”

36. “I had seen videos of erect dicks online but nothing is like actually seeing one and holding it in your hand. I just stared at it and then got an overwhelming desire to put it in my mouth. I had never ever considered anything like that before.”

37. “I saw my brother’s penis before but the first time I saw another boy’s penis was when I was 13. He was my neighbor and we had been friends for a long time. We went for a walk and he said he had to pee really bad. We were like a half-hour away from home so I said, ‘Well just go ahead and pee.’ We went behind a store and he opened his pants and peed right there in front of me. I was fascinated and just stared at it. He got an erection and was embarrassed so he put it away quickly after he was done. We walked home and didn’t say anything about it. Later that evening I went to his house and we sat in his back yard talking. He brought up the fact that I saw him with an erection and he said he was pretty embarrassed. I told him I liked it and he shouldn’t be embarrassed. He asked if I wanted to see it again and I said yeah. He took me into his garage and showed it to me. He was erect by the time he took his pants down. It was really nice.”

38. “I fell in love with the first one I saw and have loved them ever since, especially if it is someone’s that you truly care about, I love the strength of them!!”

39. “When I was a girl of 13, one Saturday morning my Mom told me to get my 17-year-old brother’s lazy butt out of bed. Me and my girlfriend who had a huge crush on him opened his door to yell at him to get up. We opened the door and we was sound asleep laying on his back with his morning wood poking up through his boxers. My girlfriend almost screamed and got the biggest smile on her face. We quickly shut the door and ran into my room. She said, ‘We just saw your brothers erect penis!’ She turned bright red and said I want to see it again. We went back over to the door and quietly opened it up. He was snoring and his penis was still in full view. We just stood at the door for what seemed like an hour and stared at it. Then my girlfriend snuck in the room and got a close up look. She just stood there staring at my brothers penis. I have to admit that it was pretty exciting. I’d never seen a grown up boy’s dick before and here was one fully erect. Since then I’ve been told that maybe my brother knew about it and wanted us to look at it. I don’t know as he was snoring pretty loudly. Even now when I think about it I get butterflies in my stomach and I’m a grown woman. I can’t help but say penis, penis penis!!!!!!”

40. “I am a female 19. When I was 14 I have a 16-year old Brother. My friends are always talking about erected penis, I was so anxious to see one. One day my brother was in the bathroom. I heard the sound he is bathing. I was peeping thru the key hole. I was shocked. The first time in my life I have seen an erected penis. I was become HOT, I become WET. I was looking at it about 10 minutes. I still remember that.”

41. “The first time I saw an erection was when I walked in on my brother in the shower. He had a huge hardon and I just stared. It was awkward but we got over it. I asked to see it the next day so he showed to me. Then he jerked off for me. This was when I was about 13. He was 14 or 15.”

42. “I was 12, at my friend’s house. We were both curious about boys. Her older brother (14) came home and we started asking him questions about what boys look like, what it’s like to have balls and stuff. He seemed embarrassed by our questions. Then I just boldly blurted out ‘Can I see your thing?’ His face turned beet red and he tried to change the subject. I kept pushing it. ‘Come on, let us see it, or I’ll kick you in the balls.’ Then I jumped on him and told my friend to help me hold him down. I noticed he had a bulge in his pants. As we wrestled him, his pants started to come down (they were loose) and I saw the top of his little ass. I said ‘Are you going to let us see everything, or do we have to beat you up?’ He gave up and said we can see it, but we couldn’t tell anyone else. When I saw it, I was pleasantly surprised. It was cute. I reached over and touched it. It was very hard. I started to play with it and, you guessed it, he shot his boy juice right at me. I acted disgusted and said ‘gross’ but I secretly liked it. When he and his sister weren’t looking, I tasted it and liked it. After that, I had occasion to see his thing a few more times. I miss those days.

43. “I was 12 and my neighbor 15. I had a crush on him and one day we were hiking in the canyon, when he excused himself because he had to pee. I asked if I could watch. He seemed embarrassed but was willing. I was mesmerized and aroused at the sight of his big beautiful penis. It was circumcised with big knob and veiny. It was the size of an adult man’s penis. It made me so wet, especially when he let me hold it and he got aroused and erect. Next day, we fondled each other and I made him spurt his warm semen wildly. He jacked it right square onto my pussy hair. It was awesome!

44. I was on a date with a boy when I was only 15. We were parked and making out like crazy when he unzipped his pants and took out his hard cock. I was totally shocked but also really turned on just looking at it. He wanted me to jack him off or suck him off but I was too afraid to do it. He went ahead and jacked off and I was fascinated to see the semen spurt out.

45. “My younger brother and I are only a year apart and when we were like 7 and 8, I always noticed that he awoke with an erection every morning and would have to stand literally about 3 feet back from the front of the toilet to piss before his hard-on went down. This made me very curious about the male penis, so one morning I made a deal with him and would show him my pussy if he let me reach into his pajamas and touch and play with his penis. He was such a good brother and let me. He loved the way I made him feel, then showed me how to jack him off. He still got the climax sensation even at age 7, but no man juice until he was about 12. We continued this into our teens…”

46. “Well the first time I saw a cock was when I was about 8 years old and I woke up in the middle of the night to go jump in my Mom and Dad’s bed. When I went downstairs, my Dad was sleeping on the couch with the remote in his hands and there was some serious cock sucking on the tv. That was the first time I saw a dick. But the first time I actually saw a real cock in the flesh was when I was 17 and uh, you know it was pretty fricken awesome, all I could think was ‘Whoa, that’s your cock, I’m gonna touch your cock.’ I was all doing my Bevis and Butthead voice. Cock is some good stuff man.”

47. “The first time I saw a picture of it, I believe I was around 7 years old. I was rummaging through my dad’s dresser drawers and found a Penthouse magazine. Boy, was I shocked at what I saw in there! The first time I saw a real one was when I was 18 years old, and it was my husband’s (although we weren’t married yet). I was turned on by it, but a little intimidated. After I had it in me though, I couldn’t get enough.”

48. “I have a brother who’s two years younger and we used to take baths together when we were really little… I walked in on my dad in the bathroom when I was waist high so I got a pretty good view of it then…. Then I saw an old man at a lake one time when I was young with his dick visible, ummmm I never saw one in a sexual way until I was 16, and it was dark so I felt it more than saw it. But I really liked it.”

49. “I couldn’t believe it had a hood. Like it emerged from its pajamas and then went back in there to hide when it was done. I also thought it looked like Gonzo [from the Muppets] when flaccid.”

50. “Soooo this is how big it gets? Or do I wait for it to change more? (In hindsight the guy wasn’t that well-endowed)”

51. “Pure FEAR. I wondered how the hell that thing was going to fit inside me. I was reluctant to believe it was physically possible.”

52. “I remember thinking they looked like a mushroom and were so soft to touch and being astounded how much they could change! How does it go from SO soft to SO hard. And I remember not having the faintest idea what to do with it… I mean really… is the skin supposed to move with the hand? Is this hurting him? I’m supposed to use hand and mouth?”

53. “I was so anxious I literally was squealing and covering my eyes (what a turn on, right?). When I finally did just bloody look at the thing, I was surprised that it was so bouncy – you know how semi-erect penises sort of flop around a lot? So weird. And oh God, so VEINY. Weirder though was seeing a non-erect penis after sex – they look so sad and deflated, just lying there with some semen drooling out.”

54. “I thought it looked strange, then wondered what I was supposed to do with it. (I knew about the existence of handjobs and blowjobs, but I had no idea how to give one. And being a virgin, I wasn’t quite ready for sex.) And it felt nothing like I had expected. I expected it to be softer, I guess?”

55. “Having a vagina all my life, I assumed that penises were in the exact same spot (between the legs) rather than a few inches below the belly button, where a girl’s pubic bone would normally be. Obviously I hadn’t considered the logistics of how sex works, but it was a crazy moment of discovery that everything I thought I knew about penises was wrong. Also, I still think they look funny.”

56. “I was shocked that the shaft of the penis had no hair on it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I was THRILLED about this particular surprise, but… surprised nonetheless. Imagine oral sex on a hairy shaft. Gross.”

Boy’s Guide to Masturbation

This post has been written because you may not have complete and accurate information on sex and masturbation. I hope you find it informative and interesting.

Many still find this subject taboo, something that can’t be spoken or written about, but as you will see, even though you may have hidden yourself under the covers to read this article, it is a subject that is very important to talk about and one that we should believe should be openly discussed.

What You’re Working With

Many boys, as well as grown men and women don’t know the names of all the parts of the penis. The most common parts are labeled in the photo above. You might like to know that the ‘meatus’ is more commonly called the ‘peehole.’ The head of the penis is more accurately called the ‘glans.’ The bottom edge of the glans is called the ‘corona.’ You penis may have more or less foreskin than the one shown.

What is masturbation?

Masturbation, also known as ‘wanking,’ ‘jerking off,’ ‘rubbing one out,’ ‘fapping,’ or a thousand other names, is a way of giving yourself pleasure. Generally, this is done by touching and stimulating your penis, also known as ‘dick,’ or ‘cock.’ Masturbation usually ends with an orgasm. That’s a feeling like none other. It starts with a kind of very pleasurable chill and ends with a delicious pulsating feeling in your penis and lower body.

Why masturbate?

Masturbation has a whole range of mental and physical health benefits as listed on the home page of this website. The biggest reason is probably because it gives you relief from horniness. Horniness is a frustrating sexual desire feeling. Most boys get horny from time to time. Many are horny several times a day.

It will also give you relief from something some boys get that is known as epididymal hypertension or in slang ‘blue balls’, where your testicles become mildly painful.

What’s wrong with masturbation?

Until recently, masturbation was frowned upon by most of society. People almost never talked about masturbation. When it came up at all, it was usually discussed in a negative way. People almost never admitted to jerking off, even though almost everyone did it. Furthermore, parents would get mad at their children if they caught them jerking off, even though the parents did it also.

This strange culture has its roots in religion. Centuries ago, religious leaders realized that the best way to control people is through guilt. What better way to make everyone feel guilty, than to shame them for something practically everyone does? Generation after generation, the shame thickened, until society in general was dead set against masturbation, even though no one knew why. People were against it because their friends and neighbors were against it, because their friends and neighbors were against it, and so on. That’s all they knew.

Fortunately, times are changing. But they haven’t changed all the way yet. You may discover that your parents will be very upset if you are caught masturbating, or even talk about it. You may find your friends make terrible fun of you if you even bring it up.

Now, as millions of people have finally discovered, there’s nothing at all wrong with masturbation!

Who masturbates?

Even though most of them will never talk about it, your friends, your cousins, your brothers and sisters, your teachers, your grandparents, teachers, your minister, your aunts, uncles, even your parents masturbate.

Am I too young to masturbate?

No one is too young, although for boys before a certain age, there isn’t much interest, orgasms may not happen, and ejaculation isn’t yet possible.

Many boys will get an erection when they need to pee due to the pressure on the nerves controlling the bladder. This may mean that they pull at their penises and may also do it when they are nervous, tired, or just in need of emotional support or something to hold on to or to touch. They do feel pleasure from this, but it can’t really be called masturbation.

Can I become too old to masturbate?

I know a guy who is 88 years old and masturbates nearly every day. If anything, masturbation improves with age. Interestingly, people don’t usually stop masturbating when they are married. They do it in addition to or along with sex with their wives.

So, I have decided I want to masturbate, what now?

If you already know how to masturbate, you can skip this section. On the other hand, you may learn something unexpected.

Make sure you have enough time and privacy. Ask your family not to barge into your room or bother you. If you and your family are good at communication, you can actually say something like, “I’m going to masturbate, so please don’t disturb me for a while.” That may not work in your family. You’ll have to judge how open they are to the concept of masturbation.

Perhaps you have already established an arrangement with those at home where they have learned to knock before entering your room. If the door is closed, you knock. Everyone deserves privacy.

Have a nice meal beforehand and go to the bathroom if you feel the need.

Never lock your door. Locking a bedroom door is dangerous for medical and fire reasons. You might enjoy setting the lighting the way you’d like and put on some nice music.

You might like to do this after a bath or shower, so you are clean, refreshed, your hands are warm, and perhaps you are already naked. You can masturbate while clothed or nude. Most people prefer being nude if there is time enough to undress and dress. Some, will simply lower their pants and underwear. Some also enjoy slowly undressing as they become more aroused (excited).

I like to recommend starting with a full body examination and admiration of yourself. It doesn’t matter if you could add or lose some weight, whether you are tall or short, or if your hair isn’t right. This is the time to absolutely enjoy who you are. You might like to look at yourself in a full-length mirror. Notice your chest, your butt, and of course your penis. It is not only OK to touch yourself, it is great. Runs your hands over your sides, your arms, between your legs, over your butt, and just enjoy the sensations.

Your penis may or may not become erect (‘erection,’ ‘boner,’ ‘woodie,’ ‘hardon’) at this point. Either way is fine.

You might get a kick out of very lightly running your fingers over various parts of your body, especially your ass, nipples and your scrotum (‘ballsack’). You may find that touching your nipples gives you an exquisite sensation. Touch these areas very, very lightly for maximum effect. If you have genital hair, touch your scrotum so lightly at first that only the hairs are touched. We think you’ll be surprised by the sensation.

You may also be ticklish. That’s normal, and generally goes away as one gets older. See if you can touch yourself in pleasurable ways that don’t tickle. For you, a heavier touch may be needed in the ticklish places.

Whenever you are ready, you can wrap your fingers around your penis. Then, slowly start moving your hand up and down, so you’re sort of gently stretching the skin along your penis. You may like to let your hand glide over the head of your penis, lightly or firmly and paying attention to the little bit of skin called the ‘frenulum’ directly under your penis head (‘glans’).

Chances are, this will feel very nice. If not, give it time. There’s no hurry, right?

Just keep moving your hand up and down. If you have had any sexy thoughts lately, let your imagine run wild. You may have thought of a girl or boy or man or woman you find particularly attractive. You may have seen someone wearing little or no clothing in a book, on the internet or in person. Picture whatever you’d like in your mind.

Fantasy is a major component in most masturbation. It is OK to fantasize about any safe activity with any person. It may not be at all appropriate to act on those fantasies, but it is totally OK to let your mind wander to sexy situations.

Do your fantasies concern you? For instance, you may find yourself thinking about a boy or man. Interest in men is called ‘homosexuality,’ or ‘gay.’

As it turns out, everyone is on a bisexual spectrum. That means that no one is 100% straight (interested only in women), or gay (interested only in men). Oh, some people are very close to one end of the spectrum or another, and it’s all fine. Our positions on that spectrum can also vary over time.

Chances are, you’ll start to feel something you’ve never felt before. For lack of better words, let’s call it a chill. For most guys, the chill is centered around your genital region. However, it is possible for the chill to be as high up as the top of your head, or as low as your toes.

You may want to speed up your hand movement, so it is going up and down really fast. You can do that if you want.

Some boys become wet at the tip of their penis with a harmless drop or two of a slippery liquid called ‘cowper’s fluid,’ or ‘pre-cum.’ Some guys have a lot of pre-cum, some have little or none, there is no right or wrong amount.

Now, some boys have quit at this point. The feelings scare them, so they stop the stimulation. That’s a shame. They are missing out on something very nice. We urge you to continue and find out what happens. Let the feeling build. Suddenly, the chill may become one of the best feelings you’ve ever had in your life. At the same time, you may feel rhythmic contractions in your penis and the area under your balls. Just let it happen and enjoy. Congratulations, you’ve had your first orgasm!

Depending on your age, thin, clear or white, thick liquid may spurt out of your penis. That’s semen, and you’re ejaculating. The amount may be very little. Young boys start with a single drip of clear semen. Fully mature men can ejaculate anything from a few clear drops to several tablespoons of white semen.

Wasn’t as great as you expected? Sometimes that happens with your first few orgasms. As you become more relaxed, more used to the situation, they can build into something truly fantastic.

Masturbation Variations

Now that you are a wanker (masturbater), you might want to explore some variations.

Perhaps the most common variation is to insert your fingers or an object into your anus. Whatever you use should be smooth and clean. Use some slippery cream or oil if you need additional lubrication. At first, don’t go in too deep, or use something too big around. There’s lots of time for careful exploration of the limits later.

You might prefer to use rubber gloves if you are averse to the possibility of getting some poop on your fingers.

You may find your anus is very tight. This can happen to many guys. The muscles can contract really hard. There is no need to force anything. Use lots of lube, and start with something thin. You don’t want something so thin or pointy that it could injure you, of course. Take your time. Relax. Breathe deep. If you can’t get it in today, you have all the rest of your life to work on it.

Here’s more about anal play:

Avoid anything that’s dangerous such as wood that can splinter, light bulbs that can shatter, and so on. Avoid chemicals such as toothpaste, soap, or anything that can’t be removed. More than one person has been taken to the emergency room because they put something in their ass that they couldn’t get out. It’s terribly embarrassing. Get it? Em-bare-ass-ing.

Another very interesting erogenous area can be your scrotum. Erogenous means a place that if touched can feel sexual. You might start with a very light touch or stroking of your scrotum with your fingertips.

There are a few guys, mostly younger guys, who are flexible enough that they can suck their own penis. You may like to try this, a lot of guys do, but most can’t reach. Some of those guys that try do not end up liking what they are doing, others enjoy it tremendously. In any case, you should never risk hurting yourself in any way trying.

Give your nipples a try. You might think as a guy, your nipples aren’t sensitive like what girls have. Wrong-O. Try very lightly running your fingertips over one of your nipples while masturbating. See if you can tell a difference in the feeling between your right and left nipples.

Many guys enjoy edging. That’s the practice of getting close to orgasm, then stopping before you have to ejaculate. After a minute, you can edge again. Unless you ejaculate, you can stay aroused as long as you want, getting close to orgasm each time.

Going a step further, you can take edging so close to the edge of ejaculating that you’re actually having orgasms, but nothing comes out. You can do it over and over, staying hard and interested for as long as you want. This does take practice. At first, you’ll cum too soon, or you’ll slip off the edge and have to build the feeling up again. Once you’ve had some dry orgasms, your body learns what you want, and it actually becomes easier. Experts don’t need to bring any sort of towels to bed, because they know they’ll have orgasm after orgasm without ever cumming. You can find out more about this and many other techniques at Advanced Male Masturbation.

How often can I masturbate?

You can masturbate several times a day, and in fact most post-adolescent boys and men masturbate on average at least once a day. There is a limit, but it’s hard to reach. One guy told me he ejaculated eleven times in a single day. I knew a fellow who had some swelling in his neck, and it became hard to swallow because some glands had become swollen. He went to a doctor, who told him to keep his masturbation down to once or twice a day. The glands went back to normal size in a week.

What if I don’t masturbate enough?

Masturbation is not required. There are people who never masturbate. They are under the mistaken belief that masturbation is bad or evil in some way. After many days of not masturbating, they will sometimes have ‘wet dreams.’ These are dreams where they have orgasms and ejaculate in their sleep. The dreams that accompany this can be quite vivid.

As the horniness builds up in a person who refuses to masturbate, they can become quite grouchy to their friends and relatives.

Can I masturbate with others?

Yes, you can, but there are some things you might like to know:

Masturbating by yourself is far and away the safest form of sex.

In this era of Covid-19, simply breathing near someone else can be dangerous. Plus, you could catch a cold or the flu without even touching anyone.


If you touch someone, the concern increases. You can end up with jock itch, crabs (little insects that live in body hair and are hard to get rid of), or monkeypox.

If you kiss, or do anything involving contact with the genitals, the danger increases yet again, including rather horrible skin diseases, and herpes, a life-long annoyance.

Finally, if you mix bodily fluids, or have any sort of sexual penetration, the risk is even higher. You could catch AIDS. Contrary to popular belief AIDS isn’t something only passed among gay men. That disease can be contracted by men or women and from men or women.

So, if you can be satisfied with solo masturbation, that’s your best bet. Solo has many advantages. You masturbate when, where and how you want. There is no need to compromise with another person’s desires.

However, if you do want to engage in mutual masturbation, you’re still safer than engaging in other sexual activities.

Mutual masturbation takes many forms, but the most common are:

0. Sharing and comparing. This is not masturbation at all, but you and your friends may like to look at each other naked, noticing penis and scrotum size and shape, ass shape, colorations on the parts of your bodies, and the amount of hair on your bodies.

1. Playing doctor. This is surprisingly common among young children. The adult version is to get naked with a friend or several friends, and pretend you are undergoing a medical exam or procedure that involves the genitals. With the youngsters, playing doctor is not necessarily masturbatory or even sexual. With adults, anything can happen!

2. You and one or more friends are near each other, possibly watching and conversing while each person only touches themselves.

3. You masturbate your friend, and then your friend masturbates you. This way, you each get to enjoy the full feelings of being touched, without having to focus on satisfying the other person at the same time.

4. You get in a position where each is masturbating the other at the same time.

Assuming you have a brother, sister, cousin or friend who is interested, this can be your masturbation partner.

Quite often, mutual masturbation can include mouth-to-genital activities. Typically, this would be sucking on a penis, known as ‘blowjob’ or ‘fellatio,’ or licking a vagina, known as ‘going down on,’ ‘eating out,’ or ‘cunnilingus.’ This is more risky, and I’d really suggest avoiding anything oral. Since you can give and get delightful orgasms strictly with hands, there’s no need for anything more.

Assuming you are under 18 years old, it is a bad idea to masturbate with anyone older than 18 years old. The older person can get in legal trouble for being sexual with an underage person. Furthermore, they can persuade you to do things you’re not ready for. Oddly, sexual activity, even if just mutual masturbation, between someone younger than 18, and someone older, can have unexpected lifelong psychological consequences for the young person.

If someone older wants to masturbate, or do anything sexual with you, and you don’t want it, you are well within your rights to say “No.” If that person bothers you continually, badgers you, tries to blackmail you, or physically forces you to get sexual in any way, that’s rape. Yup, rape can happen to boys, just like it can with girls. If you feel this might happen, let a responsible adult know the details of your concern.

Just to be safe, I’d recommend washing your hands before and after mutual masturbation.

If you’re masturbating with a boy, you can do the same things to him that you enjoy. Make sure your hands are warm, and check whether the other person is ticklish. Otherwise, you may not get the reactions you were hoping for.

Boy's Guide to Masturbation - Mutual masturbation with a boy

If you’re masturbating with a girl, she is likely to enjoy more massage-style action than you might like. You can rub anything from her head to her feet before masturbating her, and she’ll really appreciate it. In fact, if you jump right in and attack her vagina with your fingers, she may not enjoy that at all. Work up slowly.

Girl's Guide to Masturbation - Masturbating a Boy

Once she’s warmed up, she is likely to enjoy gently rubbing her clitoris, a little button between folds of skin near the top of the vagina:

Boy's Guide to Masturbation - mutual masturbation with a girl

Masturbation partners can become insistent. They quite often want to violate common sense and will try to talk you into things you don’t want to do. Let the person know in no uncertain terms, that you don’t want to take that risk, and that if they insist, everything good stops right away. If they don’t stop, it is rape, a very serious legal problem for them.

I shouldn’t even have to mention this, but if you find yourself in a situation where intercourse is going to happen, either having sex with a girl, or anal intercourse with a boy, you’ll want to make sure to use a proper contraceptive. That’s something that will supposedly prevent pregnancy and STDs. Contraceptives are not perfect. They fail all too often.

The most common contraceptive is condoms, also known as ‘rubbers.’ These are thin rubber coverings that you can unroll over your penis. That will (supposedly) keep your semen – containing sperm – within the condom, and not let it into a vagina or anus. It is not much help when it comes to crabs, herpes, and a variety of other diseases.

Girl's Guide to Masturbation, Applying a Condom
Applying a condom

Basically, masturbation, and other things you can do besides intercourse (also known as ‘coitus,’ ‘sexual congress,’ ‘balling,’ ‘banging’ or ‘fucking’), makes a lot more sense, and turns out to be just as enjoyable. Some will say even more enjoyable!

What if I want to masturbate with a guy? Does that make me gay?

Not necessarily. Many men have had man-to-man experiences, yet they end up happily married to a woman. Of course, if you are gay, also known as ‘homosexual,’ that’s become much more acceptable in today’s society. There’s nothing morally wrong with homosexuality. The only problem you may run into is that there are people in our society who are very down on things they don’t understand, and may give you a hard time, even including violence.

What’s the scoop on pornography?

Why do we watch porn?

  • Curious of what others have
  • Curious of what the other sex has
  • What is sex “really” like?
  • It’s exciting
  • We know it is naughty, this turns us on even more
  • Risk of getting caught is exciting even if it is scary
  • Helps me fantasize, turns me on, makes me really horny

Is porn real?

Much of porn is staged, faked. Some is totally real. It is very hard to tell the difference. The bottom line is that it is entertainment. Many of the porn actors are not typical. They may have overly large breasts or dicks, they may shoot out extraordinary amounts of semen, they may have amazing staying power before they orgasm, they may scream and yell and carry on, they may be especially good looking, and so on.

Porn addiction

Masturbation is not usually addictive. Pornography may be addictive. Here’s how you can tell that you’ve become addicted: If your studies or relationships have changed, if you’re doing poorly in school, or don’t have as much time for your friends and family, you may be addicted.

Most addictions are so difficult to overcome that you’ll need professional help. It may be difficult to bring it up with your parents, but that’s the place to start. If you just can’t, then perhaps another responsible adult can help. That could be a trusted teacher, family member, or the parent of one of your friends. Addictions, whether eating disorders, drug use, or sexual disorders are not something to be ashamed of. They happen to millions of people. In fact, you can be very proud that you’re seeking help.

What happens after an orgasm?

A variety of thing can happen. Not all of these will happen to you although some of these may happen sometimes:

1. You may want another orgasm immediately, but your penis softens, and you can’t get it hard again.

2. You may immediately be able to give yourself another orgasm.

3. You may not want an orgasm, or to do anything sexual, for anywhere from a few minutes to many days.

4. You may have mild pain or itching. That will go away soon. If in the very rare circumstance you feel great pain, let your parents know. You may need to see a doctor.

You can be sore because your skin became worn. You might even get blisters. Next time, be gentler and use lube. This usually goes away in a few days.

You may also have a dull ache in your penis. This is caused because your penis isn’t used to being erect and stimulated for such a long time. The problem goes away after a year or two. In the meantime, try to masturbation for shorter periods of time.

5. You may feel guilty. This is unfortunately common. It’s due to the influence on you from all the old-school misinformation still hanging around that masturbation is supposedly bad.

6. You may feel weak or tired. This can happen after your first orgasms. If it happens later on, you might want to look at other lifestyle issues. Perhaps you’re stressed, not getting enough sleep, or not eating a fully nutritious diet.

7. You can feel tired and completely spent, your head unable to think of or do something properly for a while, this is totally normal. A lot of guys will have a nap after masturbating.

What if something isn’t quite right?

As human beings, we tend to worry about things. 99% of the things we worry about turn out to be nothing. Sexual matters tend to be worse, because we are reluctant to discuss them with our parents, doctors, or any other adult.

If you have a concern, communication is the best approach. Most of the time, when you express your worry to an adult, they can put your worries to bed. For instance, when I was around 8 years old, I got the idea to put some tape around my penis just below the glans. The tape stuck really well. I couldn’t get it off and became really worried. I went to my father. He didn’t yell. He didn’t laugh. Instead, he put some lighter fluid on the tape, which weakened the glue, and was able to remove the tape easily. Worry gone! You may have other concerns, perhaps a discharge, an itch, or a concern that you have caused damage due to an unusual masturbation technique.

What if I need to see a doctor?

Girl's Guide to Masturbation - Medical Issues

Doctors are there to help you, not to hurt you.

They see penises, scrotums, and anuses every single day, they will not have any sexual charge, or any concern about seeing yours. They will maintain your privacy while being examined. Only the doctor, possibly an adult chaperone, and anyone who you specifically allow will be present while you’re examined. Normally, after puberty, your parents are not allowed to be in the exam room, unless you give your permission.

Doctors cannot tell, and don’t care if you have masturbated. Well, there is one exception. If you masturbated shortly before visiting the doctor, he may see semen oozing out of your peehole. Still, to the doctor, that’s no big deal. It’s like looking in your ear. There may or may not be earwax.

Doctors masturbate as well.

We mentioned misinformation once or twice. Here are some common misbeliefs:

  • I will lose my eyesight.
  • God will chop my hands off.
  • Masturbation makes me bald, sick, hair on my palms.
  • Bad for my health.
  • Stunts my growth.
  • Stops my penis from growing to full size.
  • My penis will wither or fall off.
  • Affects puberty.
  • My parents can smell if I have masturbated.

What is going on inside me?

Let’s start with a fun little anatomy lesson. Take a good look between your legs. Don’t be scared. You are not doing anything wrong, and you should not feel dirty. Try and relax as best you can. The area between your legs is your external genitalia consisting primarily of your testicles and penis, also known as ‘cock’ or ‘dick’ and ‘balls.’ The testicles are glands that make sperm, which are millions of microscopic, little cells that can mate with an egg in a woman and make her pregnant. When we ejaculate, also known as ‘cumming,’ which we’ll talk about shortly, your sperm are mixed with a liquid called semen from the prostate gland. The semen flows though the same tube in your penis that urine (pee) flows through. It’s called the ‘urethra.’

Here’s how all that stuff is arranged inside:

Boy's Masturbation Guide - male anatomy

So, ejaculating, or cumming, is the process of squirting out semen. The original purpose was to make women pregnant for the continuation of humankind. In order to encourage men to do that, the process feels very nice – very enjoyable! However, the opportunity to have intercourse with a woman, to put your penis in her, does not come along often, so as luck would have it, you get to enjoy the same feeling all by yourself. This process of making yourself ejaculate is called ‘masturbation.’ Masturbation doesn’t always have to end in ejaculation. Masturbation includes pretty much anything that makes you feel good in a sexual way.

I don’t look the same ‘down there’ as other boys or men. What’s up with that?

Not all boys are created equal. Some have large penises, some have small ones. Some have light ones, some are dark. The good news is that no matter what kind of penis you have, the feelings are just the same.

As you can see in the pictures, each person’s penis can be quite different than others.

Some people put great importance on penis size. That’s actually crazy but you may run into it from time to time. Generally, men assume women are more attracted to large penises. When you ask the women, however, most will say the size doesn’t matter at all. Instead, they’re much more interested in men with good personalities.

Depending on your age, you may or may not have hair in your genital region. Your penis and testicles may be small or large.

Something else you may notice is that some guys have foreskins, and some do not.

Boy's Guide to Masturbation - Circumcision

We are all born with foreskins. However, another weirdness in our society that we are slowly outgrowing is called ‘circumcision.’ This is a procedure in which the excess skin at the end of the penis is cut off. This is usually done when a baby is only a few days old. Some time, way in the past, it was assumed that a man could not keep an uncircumcised penis clean, and that circumcision eliminated that problem. However, like so many traditions, it lives on with no purpose. Many scientific studies have shown that an uncircumsized penis is just fine. In fact, there are complications with circumcision.

In a few unfortunate cases, after circumcision, an infection can begin. In very severe and extremely rare cases, the penis has to be amputated, or the baby may actually lose his life.

Perhaps even more tragically, doctors until as late as the 1980s had this crazy assumption that babies don’t feel pain. So they cut off their foreskins without anesthesia. I guess the babies just screamed and cried during the procedure because that’s what babies do, right?

Even with anesthesia, there’s a multi-day healing process, in which anything touching the area of the circumcision would be quite painful. I don’t think a baby could enjoy having a urine-soaked diaper touching his wound.

Sometimes uncircumcised boys survive all the way to adolescence or even adulthood before they get circumcised. The usual reason is what’s called ‘phimosis.’ This is a rather common condition in which the opening at the end of the foreskin is too tight. The foreskin cannot be slid back exposing the head of the penis (called the ‘glans.’) This can cause masturbation or intercourse to be painful, or even impossible. The end of the foreskin with phimosis can also become irritated or even infected.

How can you tell if you’ve been circumcised? Most circumcised men will have a brownish scar all the way around their penis usually about one centimeter (1/2-inch) behind the glans.

Circumcision Scar

What if you have phimosis? Does it hurt to masturbate? Can you not see your entire glans? Well, there’s good news. First, you probably won’t need a circumcision. You can do exercises that will eventually make it possible to pull your foreskin all the way back. More good news: You have to be erect to do these exercises, and they can be like masturbating – lots of fun!

There is also a simpler procedure than circumcision. Instead of cutting a ring of foreskin all the way off, it is slit along the top. This is called “dorsal slit.’ Once that heals, you can pull the foreskin back just fine.

Most men and women have at least some degree of body dysmorphia. That’s where you don’t think you look good. This can be nearly crippling for many people. Interestingly, some of the best looking people think they look terrible. Chances are you are much better looking than you realize.

Pornography can give guys a real complex about the size of their penis. In porn, when someone talks about penis size, they usually say their penis is anywhere from 7 to 9 inches (17 to 23 centimeters) long when erect. Those are almost always exaggerations. In the real world, the average erect penis is 5-1/2 inches (14 cm) and many are much smaller. Contrary to popular belief, women almost never turn a man down due to the size of his penis. If they’re going to dislike a guy, its because of his personality. If you tease your girl, make her do things she doesn’t want, take advantage of her, or worst of all, don’t really listen to her, she’ll find someone else, and it won’t matter about the size of his dick.

Are there unsafe masturbation practices?

Yes, totally.

  • Your urethra (peehole) is very susceptible to infection. It is best not to stick anything into the urethra. If you must do so, make sure the object is sterile and smooth. The urethral walls can tear easily, and bleed profusely.
  • It is possible to put something in your anus that you can’t remove. Things with sharp edges are especially problematic for obvious reasons. If you must put big things in, make sure a string is firmly attached so you can pull it back out. Better yet, don’t put big things in there.
  • Any sort of exchange of bodily fluids with another person could cause you a lifetime of illness.
  • There is no need to combine masturbation with use of drugs, alcohol, or dangerous practices such as cutting. Masturbation by itself is totally enjoyable.
  • When it comes to mutual masturbation or other forms of two-person sex, be very careful who you associate with. Some people are terribly abusive.
  • Keep your masturbation private. In the heat of the moment, you may let someone participate who will blab all over town, or worse, post your pictures or video on the Internet. You can never undo that.

So, what are some safe masturbation practices?

  • Add peeing into your masturbation practice. Playing with peeing is often called ‘watersports.’
  • Masturbate outdoors in a safe and secluded space.
  • Lay on one or more pillows, and rub against them, called pillow humping.
  • Edging. This is the idea of getting close to orgasm but putting it off for as long as you can.
  • Masturbate on webcam, but only with a trusted friend. Do not keep recordings of your masturbatory times.
  • Expand your fantasy life while masturbating.
  • Medibation is the combination of meditation and masturbation. It can take any form you wish from mindful masturbation, to letting your mind be as clear as you can while masturbating.
  • It is possible to read, listen to music, watch videos, and even study while masturbating.
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