Category: Fetish

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Sitting on Things

Sexual Sitting on Things

Since before recorded history, men and women have been sitting on things for sexual pleasure.

Women have the advantage in that they have two holes to play with. Women have been known to sit on bedposts and gearshifts, as well as all the usual stuff such as dildos and brush handles.

Of course women are more inclined to sit on things to fill their vaginas, but anal sitting is certainly of interest to some women.

For those who enjoy sitting on things, including your authors, much of the joy seems to be the stretching. How much can one successfully accommodate without pain? And for some, the pain is a fun component also.

One must be really cautious. In fact, you might enjoy sexual sitting vicariously, then have orgasms in more usual ways. The dangers include: Having an object slip entirely into a vagina or anus that cannot be extracted, slipping so suddenly your whole weight falls on the object, injuring your body, going too far and tearing something important, and infection.

If you must, do use lots of lube. Go slowly. Make sure you can’t suddenly slip, putting more weight on an object than you should.

Your author found a hollow plastic juggling club, an object with a round ball at the end just over an inch (25mm) in diameter. Using coconut oil, he lubed it up and slowly, ever so slowly sat down on it. That was just too much. It was starting to hurt, so your author stopped. Then he tried again, and he felt the most delicious stretch. It was no longer painful. In fact, it was delightful, then suddenly, the ball was all the way in. Your author pushed the juggling club in further until the ball was pressing nicely on his prostate. The sensation was a sort of gotta-pee feeling, but nicer. A few drops of semen were being squeezed out of his prostate and slipped along his urethra then dripped out on the carpet. So, he came, but it wasn’t orgasmic.

Then your author went for a walk around the house. The bulk of the juggling club was sticking out of his ass like a tail. He could feel it’s weight tugging ever so slightly on the ball still in his rectum. He could feel the club waiving around with his footsteps.

Being able to resist no longer, he jerked off to a wonderful orgasm. He felt the orgasmic contractions constricting around the stem of the juggling club.

After settling down, he tried to pull the club out, but his ass was clamping down tight. It would not come out. After a minute, he tried again, pulling very slowly as his ass expanded, and then, finally it was out.

Then your author discovered that washing that plastic club with several kinds of soap over the course of several minutes would not entirely remove the sweet anal odor. It didn’t smell like poop, but was concerning because the anal gland smell, although attractive, might be a sure give-away to anyone who would use that club.

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Sara Finds a New Way For Both of Us to Cum

By Spurtz

The Sara Series:
My Wife Sara is a Real Piece of Work
Watching Sara Service Another Man’s Cock
Sara Loves Giving Handjobs
Sara Jacks Off Six Guys

After the session with six guys, Sara couldn’t stop raving about how much fun it was to have six hard pricks to play with. Seven counting mine, although she never actually serviced me. She also went on and on about how great it felt to fuck the guy with the coke can sized cock. Of course every time she went on about his dick, it just made me feel more inadequate.

She insisted that we have threesomes with the guy, whose name is Nick, at least once a week because she loved the way his monster cock felt in her cunt. These weren’t really threesomes because there wasn’t anything I could do with the guy’s big cock. It was too big around to even get in my mouth. The “threesomes” really ended up with Sara fucking the shit out of the guy’s monster cock while I watched and jerked off.

Luckily she tired of the guy after a few weeks. He had zero personality and there was no way to carry on an intelligent conversation with him. Obviously dick size isn’t everything to a woman. So he more or less faded into the sunset. Of the other five guys, only one of them really appealed to her. That was #1, whose real name was Jerry. He was the guy with the curved dick who won the award for the hardest hard-on.

She contacted him and we had a few threesomes with him. Those were fun because I got to fully participate, plus Jerry liked to suck my cock as much as he liked to fuck my wife. And I liked to suck his dick which really was super hard. We all three enjoyed masturbating both cocks.

But all things run their course. Eventually Sara needed something new. “Honey,” she said, “I’m thinking about something else we can do that we’ve never done before.”

Oh, shit, I thought, what cockamamie idea has she come up with now? Probably something that will further humiliate me. Maybe she’ll want to fuck ten guys while I watch. “What’s your idea, babe?” I ventured.

“Let’s buy a strap-on so I can fuck your ass. What do you think? Most of the stuff we’ve done is for my benefit. So I think it’s time we came up with something for your benefit,” she replied.


Sara pegging, a new way to cum

My benefit? Where does she come up with this shit? If we were going to do something for my benefit, it would be three high school cheerleaders fighting to see who could take my cum load down their throat. My benefit is not having some rubber cock shoved up my ass. But I couldn’t tell her that.

“That would be different, for sure,” I replied. “But what fun is that for you?”

“Well, I like the idea of being totally in control. Having you has my boy toy. Plus some of those strap-ons have battery operated vibrators that will stimulate my clit while I am pumping your ass full of cock. C’mon, be a sport. Give it a try.”

“Ok, I’ll go along with it but don’t buy one that has a monster cock on it. I don’t want some giant dildo shoved up my ass,” I replied.

“Why don’t we go to the local porno shop and pick one out together,” she suggested.

So we did. The one she picked out did have a smaller than usual cock on it but it was still a good 6” long. I wasn’t too concerned about the length. It was the girth that scared me. We finally agreed on one that had a very realistic looking cock on it that was about 4” in circumference which was about 1.25” in diameter. She thought that was pretty small but it looked big to me. As we were examining it in front of the clerk at the sex shop, she said, “Honey, are you sure you can’t take something bigger than this? Don’t you want your ass to be really filled up like I do when Nick fucks me with that huge cock?”

The clerk’s jaw dropped and nearly hit the floor. I’m sure he never heard any woman talk so openly. My face was burning with shame from even admitting in front of a stranger that I wanted to be fucked in the ass. The device Sara was holding was a strapless version that had a u-shaped hook on the end that went up her vagina and stayed in place. Right where it pressed against her clit was vibrating pad. It was on sale for $36. I handed the guy a fifty and told him to keep the change so we could get the hell out of there.

Sara couldn’t wait to try it out when we got home. She put the batteries in it and liberally coated it with K-Y jelly. She had me lay on my back and spread my legs. Then she lubed up my asshole and inserted the thing inside her pussy. She got down between my legs and directed the head of the dildo right at my asshole. I had my knees pulled up giving her more access to the promised spot.

“Relax, babe,” Sara said, “I’ve read up on this and if you tense up, it will hurt much worse. If you totally relax it might hurt just a bit at first but once it’s up inside you and I start pumping away, you will love it.”

I hoped she knew what she was talking about and I tried to relax. I was a bit surprised that my dick was fully hard. Based on videos I’d seen, I assumed my hard-on would go away once she started fucking me. I never understood why some guys lost their erections while being fucked.

The dildo started to penetrate my asshole. I tried to totally relax my entire body as Sara kept pushing it in. The head slid past my sphincter and although there was a bit of pain, it was starting to feel pretty good. I could even feel some of the vibrations. As she began to pump away I was shocked at how good it felt. She had both hands on my thighs and pushed my legs back just like I did when I fucked her. I could feel the coronal ridge of the dildo rubbing on the inside of my ass and it felt fantastic. I had read that the anal canal was loaded with nerve endings which was why some women actually preferred to be ass-fucked. I hadn’t fucked Sara in the ass yet but her day was coming.

I looked down at my cock and unlike many of the gay videos I had seen, my prick was rock hard and throbbing with each thrust Sara was giving me. After a good ten minutes of steady fucking, I knew she had cum at least three or four times and now it was my turn. Without even touching my rigid cock, the semen started spurting out with amazing force. The first shot just made it to my chest but the second one blasted me right in the face. I opened my mouth to try to catch any subsequent streams and was lucky to get several into my mouth.

Sara kept right on pumping as my dick kept spurting. Finally I was done and when Sara realized my orgasm was over, she pulled the dildo out of my ass. She leaned in and kissed me and licked a lot of the semen off of my face.

“How was it babe?” she wanted to know. “It was great,” I gasped, “far better than I expected. Looked like it was good for you too.”

“It was. In fact, now I want you to fuck my ass so I can experience what you did.” I needed a bit of recuperative time but after about a half hour I was ready to give Sara her first ass fucking. We went through all the same lube procedures and soon I had her legs up over my shoulders and started to penetrate her ass with my erection. My dick was somewhat bigger than the dildo so I wasn’t sure how it would go. But Sara knew how to totally relax her sphincter and my cock amazingly slid in much easier than either of us expected. My dick felt really good in her ass and I wondered why we had never done this before. She said the same thing.

As I pumped away, she had orgasm after orgasm, and finally I could take no more and unloaded another major cum load, this time in her ass. As we lay there in post-orgasm glow we talked about how great the experience had been for both of us getting ass-fucked. We agreed that this had to become a regular part of our sex lives.

“Sweetie,” she said, “whose cock does that dildo remind you of?” I knew she was talking about Jerry although his prick had a bit more curve to it, but it was close. “How would you feel about having a real dick up your ass, assuming Jerry is up for it?”

I knew Jerry would have no problem shoving his dick up my rectum and I said so. She immediately called him on the phone and asked him if he would like to fuck me in the ass and also take my cock up his back door. He was all for it and I knew she would want to fuck both of us with her new strapless strap-on dildo.

Jerry’s cock was a bit bigger around than the dildo but surprisingly, I was super curious as to what that would feel like. And I couldn’t wait to find out.

So now we had something new to look forward to. I also wondered what other ideas Sara would dream up.

############

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My Girlfriend the Drummer

My girlfriend the drummer, sex play with drumsticks

I sing and play guitar. My girlfriend is in the band. She’s the drummer. We’re reasonably successful, but we do have to supplement our gig income by teaching music. That’s where the real money is, at least for now. Like all musicians, we hope for greater success, although I have to say, what we have now is rather satisfying.

Anyway, one night we were fooling around in bed. We don’t fuck all that often. We’d rather do what we call ‘manual’ things to each other. Handjobs and such. Sometimes I lick her to great orgasms. And on this one night, that’s what we were doing. Specifically, I was licking her anus, and the area between her anus and vagina. Suddenly, she got up, distracted. She grabbed her drumsticks and started tapping out a new rhythm on her nightstand.

She stopped and looked at me, evidently with a new idea. Yet another rhythm maybe? No, she asked whether I might like to have her tap out the rhythm on my belly.

I said, “Sure, why not?”

She started tapping her sticks lightly on my belly. It kind of tickled, and didn’t really feel all that great. Plus it was just a bit cold in the room. I noticed that the tips of her sticks where hitting close together, like all within one square inch.

The thought came to me, that since my scrotum was currently drawn up tight due to the coldness, it might feel nice to have her tap on my balls.

She did. It was surprisingly nice. She tried some other rhythms. After a minute I came and she hadn’t even been touching my cock.

We have done it many time since. If you and your partner want to try something like this, I have only one suggestion: Make sure your scrotum is firm and tight. We tried it with loose balls once, and it kind of hurt when the tip of a stick hit right on top of a testicle. Even that was fun, however.

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My Girlfriend is Cruel

Massage table for sexual play
Get your own massage table like this one

My girlfriend is cruel, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

She has a massage table at her house and these soft bandana-like things with which she can tie my ankles and wrists to the table.

She gets me hard, then she starts ever so gently fondling my balls. Slowly, she builds up the pressure until she’s squeezing them so hard that her fingertips turn white. It fucking hurts, but oddly, its pleasurable, too. For those who don’t know, testicles are in a think and firm rubbery covering that makes them very tough. It may be painful, but it’s harmless. At least I think so.

After doing that for a several minutes, while laughing sardonically, she then jerks me off. I try not to cum right away, but knowing what’s coming next, I can’t hold off very long.

Within a minute or two, cum is shooting all over the place as she continues to stroke me.

She’ll typically say something like, “Good, now that’s out of the way.”

We both laugh, although my laughter is rather nervous.

She continues to stroke me, but now it doesn’t feel so good. I want her to stop. I’m done sexually. I’ve ejaculated, and now I need to be alone. I really, really need her to let go of my cock.

But, no, that’s not going to happen. Now, after adding more oil to the palm of her hand, she starts rubbing that palm over the tip of my penis, as she holds the shaft upright with her other hand.

It’s fucking excruciating. For those who don’t know, it’s an excruciating tickle. Maybe a guy can imagine underwear being rubbed against the tip of the dick. Or a girl might imagine cloth being rubbed over her exposed clitoris.

She laughs like a maniac and continues the torment. I’m twisting and pulling at the ankle and wrist restraints. But, I can’t get away, and she continues. It’s amazingly horrible. And yet, it’s also kind of nice in a very strange way.

Eventually, the sensation dies down a little bit as my sanity starts to return. It starts to feel like I’m going to pee. And sure enough, completely out of control, I feel a single squirt escape my body. She laughs some more. So do I.

But she continues. The horrible sensation builds again. I’ve really got to get away. I’m twisting, I’m yelling, and laughing at the same time. Now it starts feeling like I’m going to release more pee. Instead, I believe I have ejaculated a second time. Or maybe it was more pee. I’m not quite sure.

It must have been five minutes since my second ejaculation, if that’s what it was, and finally, my penis softens. We both know it’s over. I swear I’ll never let her do that again.

A week later, we do it again.

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Watching Sara Service Another Man’s Cock

By Spurtz

The Sara Series:
My Wife Sara is a Real Piece of Work
Sara Loves Giving Handjobs
Sara Finds a New Way for Both of Us to Cum
Sara Jacks Off Six Guys

My wife really loves to play with my dick and jack me off. And of course I love it. She likes to do all the other stuff too, but has become an incredible hand job artist. She gets so into it that she can actually achieve her own orgasms while pumping my cock.

We look at a lot of porn together. My computer is connected to a 42” monitor so we can really get the full experience of seeing sex onscreen. Lately we have started watching cuckhold porn where the wife in the video has sex with another man in front of the husband. Sometimes the husband just watches. Other times he jacks his own cock while watching, In the more extreme cuckhold videos, the husband even sucks the other guy’s cock and more.

My wife Sara typically plays with my cock while we watch porn. In some of the hotter cuckold videos, I have unexpectedly started shooting my cum before I even realized I was at that point.

“You really get off when the husband watches his wife jack off the other guy, don’t you?” Sara asked.

“I do,” I admitted, “There is something really hot about it.”

“Would you feel the same way watching me play with another man’s hard dick?” she wanted to know.

I had to think about it, but truthfully, visualizing my beautiful wife stroking a strange cock was a tantalizing thought. In my mind’s eye I could picture her hands flying up and down an erect cock with streams of cum shooting out.

“It’s a turn-on,” I admitted, “but the question is always, is the reality the same as the fantasy?”

“There’s only one way to find out,” she replied. Damn, I thought, she’s really serious about this. I could feel my cock start to thicken as I visualized it happening. Obviously I must have thought it was a good idea. “But where would we find somebody? I don’t want it to be one of our friends or anybody either of us works with,” I ventured.

Sara got a gleam in her eye and I suspected she already had somebody picked out. “Well, the last few times I have walked the dog down to the park, there’s been a guy there with his dog. We’ve talked, but no outright flirting and certainly nothing sex related. But I do find him appealing. How about you accompany me on the next dog walk since he appears to always be there at the same time I am. We can both approach him about it. You need to be there so he understands what the deal really is.”

The next day was Saturday, which was Sara’s usual day to go to the park with Sandy, our dog. We ambled down to the park and Sara pointed him out. She said his name was Jeff. Now confronted with actually having to make a proposition that I really wasn’t prepared for, I started to get cold feet. Sara could tell I was hesitant but she dragged me over to where Jeff was and introduced me.

After ten minutes of small talk, Sara, always the bold one in the family, took charge. “Jeff,” she said, “Steve and I have been talking about putting some new excitement in our lives and we want to ask if you would like to help out.” From the look on Jeff’s face, I think he already had an idea which way this conversation was headed. Not mincing any words, Sara continued, “We would like to invite you over to our condo one evening for some drinks followed by some sex.” Wow, I thought. She’s not pulling any punches.

I could tell by the look on Jeff’s face that he wasn’t that surprised. It made me wonder if maybe Sara had already mentioned something about it to him previously. I didn’t care as long as I wasn’t left out of the mix.

“Hey, guys….that’s a terrific offer. I’m definitely all in. But is this really something you are both fully committed to doing? Bringing an outsider into a relationship can be tricky. It can be great fun for everybody, but sometimes it’s not.”

“If you are worried about me being jealous, I’ve already thought it through,” I said. “There are some ground rules. We need to keep whatever we do as strictly a fun experience and not let anything too personal happen. That means no kissing or hugging, No intimacy beyond the down and dirty sex part, if that makes any sense.”

“That makes a lot of sense and I think it’s a good starting point. Just how far did you want to go?”

Sara followed up on Jeff’s question. She and I had already discussed what we were prepared to do. “At our first session, Steve and I just want to limit it to me giving you a handjob while he watches. If everything goes OK we can consider more in the future. We were hoping this could be an ongoing relationship and not a one-time thing.”

“Sounds like a great start,” Jeff replied. We then worked out the details. We decided to waste no time and asked Jeff if he was available that evening. He was, so we parted company and set a time to meet later that evening at our place.

Jeff showed up right on time. We sat around and had a couple of drinks talking about everything except what was already on everybody’s mind. Finally Sara took charge and invited us into the bedroom. She was wearing a loose shift type dress which she pulled off over her head. She was not wearing any underwear so she was totally naked. Jeff’s eyes devoured her luscious body and he started stripping off his clothes and I followed suit. Soon all three were stark naked and Jeff’s prick was already semi-hard. He was quite well endowed, but so am I. Our two dicks were quite similar in size, about 7-inches long and fairly thick. I am cut and I guess he was too, but he still had some foreskin. As his prick fully hardened, what foreskin was there rolled back on its own exposing a very nice looking cockhead. Sara was visibly excited looking forward to getting her hands on some strange cock.

A couple of weeks ago, more or less as a joke, Sara had bought me a male masturbation toy called AcmeJoy. It has a soft latex sleeve that slides over my cock. On the inside of the sleeve are many little protuberances that massages my penis as the sleeve rotates around my hard dick. The device has several speeds and also can be set to spin one way and then spin the other. You have to manually move it up and down on your cock or you can just let it sit in one position. Through practice I found that I could tilt it while stroking up and down and that applied extra pressure on my frenulum.

rotating penis stimulation sex toy
That’s my actual cock and my actual AcmeJoy
(Get Yours here)

Sara had suggested that I might want to use the toy on my cock while she worked over Jeff’s throbbing man-meat. The three of us got on the king sized bed. Sara lubed up my cock and slid the toy onto it. Then she turned to Jeff and poured a generous amount of lube on his throbbing cock and went to work. Sara had many tricks that made her a true handjob artist. She knew every part of a dick to stimulate and also knew just how long to stay on one particular part of a man’s anatomy.

Just watching her masturbate Jeff was a huge turn-on. I knew I didn’t need the AcmeJoy but turned it on anyway. God, what a feeling. I saw Sara slide one hand under Jeff’s big ballsack and I knew one of her fingers was headed for the guy’s asshole. I loved it when she did that to me. Then she surprised the hell out of me. She bent over and slid the bulging cockhead of Jeff’s prick right into her mouth and proceeded to suck his dick like a woman possessed.

This was not part of our agreement but I really didn’t care. Seeing her suck his dick was even more stimulating than watching her stroke it. Seeing his big dick slide back and forth in her mouth and with what the sex toy was doing to my cock, it was way too much stimulation. We hadn’t even been going at it for ten minutes when I blew a huge load of cum into the toy. It was definitely one of the best orgasms of my life. I had to turn off the toy because the sensation was literally more than I could stand.

I lay there totally wiped out and continued to watch Sara service Jeff’s cock. She saw that I had turned off the toy and she pulled her lips off of Jeff’s prick. “Give me the toy,” she demanded. “But it’s full of cum,” I replied. “I don’t care, give it to me, and don’t let the cum slide out.”

I pulled the toy off my prick and handed it to her. She immediately slid the cum-filled device right onto Jeff’s prick and turned it on. She had an almost evil grin on her face as she proceeded to milk Jeff’s dick with the toy. With one finger plunging in and out of his asshole, she jacked the toy up and down the length of Jeff’s turgid cock. I watched as his body shook and bucked as the orgasm of a lifetime hit the poor guy. He literally screamed as spurt after spurt of jism jetted from his dick into the rotating receptacle that encased his penis. Sara continued to work the toy up and down the poor guy’s cock as it spun around at the highest speed setting. The sensation had to be mind numbing. He was begging her to stop but she wouldn’t do it. He tried to pull away but she kept right after him. Finally she decided to give him a break and pulled the toy off his still throbbing cock, which was now bright red. As she did, two huge loads of cum spilled out of the sleeve all over poor Jeff’s cock. She pulled her finger out of his ass and immediately put it to her nose and took a big whiff. When I saw that, my prick involuntarily twitched up and down a few times as the last vestiges of cum drooled out of the tip. Why was I so turned on about my wife smelling some stranger’s asshole?

The three of us lay together on the bed trying to recover. Sara confessed that she had orgasmed three times during the session. But added that she really needed to feel a big cock inside her. With all the barriers long gone, Jeff and I took turns fucking her far into the night until we were both drained of semen. The insatiable little bitch still wanted more and attempted to coax our pricks back to life with her mouth and tongue. I somehow recovered enough to give her one final fuck while Jeff just lay there and looked at us in wonder.

Later that night after Jeff left, I asked her why she was so quick to go down on him after our agreement that only masturbation would be on the table. “I’m not sure,” she replied. “All I know is I was looking at the shiny head of his engorged prick and I just couldn’t help myself.” I didn’t tell her that I was jealous. Not jealous that she was sucking another guy’s dick. I was jealous that it wasn’t me sucking it. But I figured there was always next time.

I knew my sex life with Sara was forever changed and looked forward to what would come next.

###########

Here is another in the Sara series: My Wife Sara Loves Giving Handjobs.

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My Favorite Fetish – Glans Blame

my favorite sexual fetish, glans blame, also known as apple polishing, rosy palm, glans rubbing, cockhead torture

Hello, it’s me, Jeremy Watson, co-author of Sex270. I suppose my favorite fetish lately is intense glans palming, also known as glans blame, apple polishing, cockhead torture, rosy palm, or glans blame

I’ll have a friend start by tying me down by my wrists and ankles with soft ropes or bandanas to the corners of a bed or massage table. It doesn’t matter whether this friend is young or old, fat or thin, white or black, or male or female. Then the friend gets me erect, oils up the palm of one hand and starts rubbing it over the glans (tip of penis) while holding my penis in the grip of his or her other hand. If you’re a guy and have never had this done, you’ve gotta try it.

It is the most excruciating tickle in the world. You feel like you’ve gotta get away. Yet, it’s intensely erotic at the same time. You don’t generally ejaculate. It’s just too intense, But you might involuntarily pee. Anyway, that’s my favorite fetish at the moment, both giving and getting.

I have also enjoyed other fetishes such as firm testicle massage.

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Whisking

Use a Whisk for Sexual Purposes

As you probably know, a whisk is a kitchen gadget used for mixing. As sex toys, they may be quite interesting. There are many accounts of women enjoying the pleasure of opening their vaginas with whisks. One can even find pictures on the internet of women, and I assume men, putting whisks into their anuses.

I suppose one has to be careful to avoid pinching where the blades of the whisk cross.

A person doesn’t necessarily have to press the whisk into themselves. I’ll bet just running the blades lightly over a vulva, scrotum, or along the ass crack may be quite erotic.

Does anyone know of something like a whisk that could be pressed into a peehole? Along the same lines, notice the end of the whisk handles. I’ll bet some are just the right size and shape for urethral stimulation. Like all urethral play, everything must be sterile and have smooth edges since the urethra is quite prone to tearing and infections.

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Milking

Milking is a term with several definitions:

To give a man a handjob until he ejaculates.

To give a man a handjob until he ejaculates every last drop he has.

To give a man a handjob causing him to ejaculate more than once.

To stimulate the prostate gland, generally with one or two fingers, causing semen to flow out from the penis. This may occur without orgasm or full ejaculation.

Forcing a man to ejaculate with a handjob whether he wants to or not.

To extract milk from an animal’s udders.

To get every last bit out of a subject in conversation.

To continuously or repeatedly make fun of someone in conversation.

According to Urban Dictionary, another definition is to extract semen by giving a handjob to an unwitting roommate while he sleeps.

Extracting milk by hand, mouth or with a suction device from breasts.

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What Do You Like?

My flight was delayed. I met a guy in the restaurant bar who was also delayed. We were scheduled on the same plane. It turns out we live in the same city. The minutes turned into hours. He and I got to talking, because what else was there to do?

Our conversation became more intimate. I was divorced. He had been a serial dater, but never married.

The conversation deepened. We were pretty much whispering because although there was quite a bit of noise in the bar, what we were talking about became, well, quite private.

We were talking about masturbation. We were agreeing with each other that it’s a good thing. We went on to agree that if everyone was more accepting of masturbation, it might cure some of the world’s ills. Like overpopulation and unwanted children. Like STDs.

Then he asked a weird question, “What masturbatory thing would you like, but you can’t do it to yourself?”

Normally, I’d never answer a question like that. I’d be shocked. But the way this conversation had been unfolding, it seemed fine to give him my answer:

“I have this fantasy of being tied down, and have someone rub the palm of their hand over the tip of my erect dick. It’s a feeling I can’t stand, and can’t get enough of, all at the same time.”

“Ah, I know the feeling,” he said, adding, “You know, I’ve always been surprised that with a little oil, the feeling is even more intense than with a dry hand. Plus it doesn’t rub the tip of your penis raw.”

I was glad to have some solidarity. Someone who experienced something like me, and was willing to talk about it. Because, face it, sex with women is great, but there can be something missing. Most women are into kissing, dating, and the whole package. Sometimes a guy just wants to get off. Sometimes a guy wants something weird, that most women wouldn’t understand.

“What do you like?”

“I like my balls massaged. Really hard, like rolfing.”

I knew exactly what he was talking about. While I’m not so much a fan of that, I can enjoy a good, firm ball massage.

He went on to say, “But I don’t care for oral, anal, kissing or any of that.”

I was delighted, because that describes me to a tee.

They got the airplane fixed and we boarded, but not before exchanging phone numbers.

A day later he called. “When can we get together?”

I knew exactly what he was talking about.

“Dude, I’m available right now.”

Fifteen minutes later found me in his apartment. We did all the things we discussed. It was even better than I could have imagined. He rubbed the tip of my penis so perfectly that not only did I squirm, yell, and carry on, I even involuntarily let out a little pee a couple of minutes before cumming.

I squeezed his balls so hard I thought they’d pop. He informed me that they are like chicken gizzards. Rubbery. You can’t pop them with your fingertips. You just have to be careful not to injure the back sides where the cords attach. I kind of knew that, but it was reassuring to hear. He was yelling, he was wincing, he was loving it. He kept wanting me to squeeze harder. It kept me very erect doing that to him.

He came without me even touching his penis. Then, he offered the same treatment to me. I had to ask him to be gentler, but found myself very much enjoying the testicle massage. I came a second time, but only because he let go of my scrotum, slowly buried a finger deep in my rectum, and jerked me off with his other hand.

We meet up every month or two. Most of the time we are happy with ourselves or the various ladies we meet. But every now and then, we want something really intense, and we know exactly how to give it to each other.

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Sex Play with Encyclopedia

Weird couple has sex play with Encyclopedia

Perhaps my wife and I are a weird couple. We don’t have sex all that often, although I guess with two grown children, we’ve done it often enough.

We like other things. She likes inner labia stretching. She likes me to pull and pull. Oh, I don’t mean hard enough to hurt her. She just likes the feeling of being tugged on. I’ll do it for an hour sometimes. Meanwhile, I’m hard the whole time. Somehow, and I can’t explain why, it’s a real thrill for me to do that for her, almost every time.

Sometimes she’ll orgasm just from that, but generally not. Usually, I finish her off with a good licking while I probe her butt with one finger. She likes just one finger. Years ago, we experimented with more fingers, and got her up to four, and four in her vagina too, but these days, she just likes it simple.

There are two versions of labia pulling. One is dry. I can get a good grip and pull hard. That doesn’t usually last very long. She’ll get all wet. Her labia become slippery, and so my fingers keep slipping off. That’s the second version. I don’t get a good grip, and keep trying. This is what can send her into orgasm on the somewhat rare occasions when she does orgasm from this.

Every now and then, I’ll dry her labia as best I can, and pull and kind of shake really hard. She loves that, but doesn’t orgasm from it. I swear, her labia are somewhat longer than they used to be, but she claims they’ve always been the same length.

That’s her. Perhaps I’m even weirder. It started with gentle testicle massage. A few times, I’ve orgasmed just from that. She’d start by very lightly massaging my scrotum. Then, she’d get a good grip on each testicle, one between each thumb and first two fingers. She’d squeeze until the testicles would slip out of her grasp, popping into another position in my scrotum, like wet bars of soap. It’s fun. I can never tell which testicle will slip out first. She does it on purpose. It’s kind of a guessing game. Which one will pop out?

Yes, it kind of hurts, but I love it. Lately, she’s been squeezing harder. It hurts more, but I’m enjoying it more. I don’t understand it, but who am I to ask questions?

She says the more I yell and squirm, the wetter, and hornier she gets.

I’ve read several times that the gonads are like chicken gizzards, with very rubbery thick outer layers, and pretty much impossible to damage just with finger manipulation.

Sharing that info with her gave her an idea. We have an old set of encyclopedias. She decided she wanted me to lay my testicles on the edge of a table, and she’d pile more and more books on top until I screamed, “Stop!”

The first time we tried it was just last Thursday. She put a book on, and my balls popped up into my scrotum before much pressure was applied even by that first book.

OK, back to the drawing board. She tied a bandana fairly tightly around my scrotum so my balls couldn’t slip away. Then she put the book back on.

I felt the pressure, but it wasn’t in the slightest painful. My penis was rock hard, and she was having fun too, as I could see a drip of liquid escape from her vagina, and her nipples were as erect as my penis in their own way.

She added another book. Still, pressure only, no pain.

With the third book, we had to start over. The angle wasn’t right, and the books were sliding off each other. Finding a small paperback book, she put it under the far edge of the first book so that the books would be level, but almost the full pressure would be squeezing down on my balls. My that felt nice!

She slowly added books, in alphabetical order, of course. By the time we got to F, my balls were starting to hurt with that flaming kind of pain that anyone who has played with ball squeezing is familiar with.

She added G, and the pain wasn’t much worse. Staying like that for a couple of minutes, the pain entirely subsided. Now all I felt was pressure, and it was extremely nice!

My mind was thinking about what it would be like when she got several more books on the pile, and then it happened. Wham! Cum started squirting spasmically out of my penis of its own accord. I was having a wonderful orgasm and there was nothing I could do about it.

She wanted me to hold still after my cum, and add more books, but you know how it is. My attitude shifted, and I was done. I do believe we’re going for at least ten volumes later today when she gets home from work.