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90-Ways-to-Spice-Up-Your-Sex-Life

by Jeremy J. Watson



Enjoy this book of unusual sexual activities. Many may not be for you. Some may be too intense, others too mild. You may have already experimented with some of these techniques. However, you’ll find some that will amaze you. You and your partner can discover new kinds of fun that can open entire new vistas. You can use any of these activities exactly as they are described, or make up your own versions based on what you read.

Most are written for heterosexual couples, but with minor variation can be also enjoyed by homosexual and solosexual people and groups.

Disclaimer: The material in this book is not to be taken as a replacement for proper medical or professional advice. Exercise proper safety measures in all sexual play.

1. Stretch scrotum: Many men don’t realize they like this. You can pull a man’s scrotum quite firmly, and while it is not orgasmic, it can feel comforting or even exciting. For men who have trouble starting an erection, it can be a great trigger. It doesn’t matter whether the scrotum is currently drawn up tight, or loose. However, it can be pulled further when loose. Be careful about fingernails or pulling hairs.

2. Massage: While massage can be an end in itself, if combined with sexual play, it is a great augmentation. You don’t have to be an expert to give a good massage. Simply communicate. Let your partner know that you’d like to hear when he or she wants more oil, more or less pressure, attention to one area or another.

You’ll find communication is one of the most important factors in all sexual play. The more you communicate with your partner, the better it gets.

Communication can be tricky if there are things that embarrass you. For instance, you may very much want massage of your upper inner thighs, but think it would be considered weird by your partner. If you have the courage to mention your desire, you might just be surprised. Or, your partner may think it is weird. In any case, it is better to find out. You may even be able to discuss why your partner feels it is weird, and end up coming to a resolution and getting what you want.

It may be that you’ve never massaged anyone in your life. The general idea is that it should be a comfortable procedure. Make sure the room is warm enough. Warm your hands if they are cold. In most cases, your partner will want some oil so your fingers don’t feel scratchy against the skin.

You can start at the top of the body and work down. Most massages start with the recipient laying on his or her stomach.

You might start with the head before you put oil on your hands. Rub the scalp firmly, being careful not to pull hair. Then, work on the neck, shoulders, eventually massaging the upper and lower arms, and don’t forget about the hands. Massage of the hands can be very erotic. Then massage the upper back, moving down to the lower back.

Some people will then skip over the butt, instead doing the upper legs, lower legs, ankles, and then the feet, finally returning to the butt.

Have the recipient roll over. Don’t be surprised to see male recipients with an good, solid erection at this point. Ignore it, or compliment it. Many women don’t realize how vein some men can be about their erections. Massage the face, reach under the neck and massage the lower neck and back of shoulders, using the recipient’s weight to help, then the arms, and hands again. Return to the upper chest.

At this point, the massage may skip over the breasts, and sometimes skip the stomach too, moving on to the thighs, then the legs, ankles and feet. After that, you can return to the breasts, and optionally lightly massage the stomach.

Most of your strokes should originate near the middle of the body, and work outward.

Once the general massage is done, you may want to focus on the genitals. This can finish with a handjob, blowjob, pussy eating, or G-spot massage. A massage that finishes with an orgasm is referred to as a “happy ending massage.”

Another version is a tantric massage, in which you give the genitals attention, but purposely end without inducing an orgasm, leaving the recipient in a energetic, charged-up state.

3. Lights on: Get naked and sexual in the middle of the day when there is plenty of ambient light, or turn the lights on, and enjoy each others company. It is OK to study each others bodies in great detail. Do not force this on someone who has body dysmorphia – someone who is not proud of their body. For them, it would be horribly embarrassing.

4. Massage inner labia: This is something that many women may not realize they like until they try it. Massaging the inner labia can be done dry, with natural lube, or any good oil or lotion. For most women, a very light touch is best at first, slowly working up to a more moderate pressure. Be careful about pulling hairs. Maintaining the massage for a long period of time can make a woman very horny. Occasionally brushing the clitoris adds sparkle.

5. Make a sextape: These days, they aren’t generally video tapes like the days when the term “sextape” was created. Grab your phone or video camera and make a video. Chances are, it will never be for showing to anyone, however some people like to upload their finished products to websites such as XTube.com, XHamster.com, or XNXX.com. Make very sure your sextape is well hidden. You wouldn’t want your kids to find it.

6. Apple polishing: You can give a man very intense pleasure with apple polishing, also known as “glans rubbing,” or “glans blame” in Japan. Wrap your fingers around your partner’s erect penis with one hand to hold it, leaving the top exposed. Rub the palm of your other hand over the top. Most men will squirm like crazy, because this imparts a nearly unbearable tickle. Some men won’t like it. Others will love it. For one who likes it, it may help to tie the recipient down or sit on his hands or legs, so he can’t get away.

After a few minutes, the sensation settles down, becoming more bearable. It usually transmutes into a combination of ‘gonna-cum’ and ‘gotta-pee’ feeling. Generally, the recipient doesn’t cum or pee, however, you may want to cover the bed with something waterproof, because in at least one case your author knows of, the recipient involuntarily let out a large splash of urine.

Glans rubbing can be done dry or with lube. Interestingly, the sensation is stronger with lube.

If the sensation dies down too far, you can try changing the amount of squeeze from the holding hand, or the pressure or angle of the palm. Rubbing more over the top surface of the glans can make the sensation stronger.

Be careful about too much pressure, not enough lube, or going too long, since the skin of the glans can become irritated, taking days to heal.

7. French kissing: For those who don’t know, this is kissing in which one’s tongue enters the partner’s mouth. If you’ve never experienced it, you might think it is unappealing. Once you try it, you’ll probably have an entirely different opinion. Two people French kissing can play battle with their tongues. Pressing one’s tongue in deep, and exploring as much of the other person’s mouth as is accessible can be great fun.

8. Finger rub buttcrack: A seemingly simple thing that can be underrated is to simply run your fingertip over the top of your partner’s butt crack. While not a super sexual act for the majority of people, it enhances the overall mood for most everyone.

9. Get a dildo: Placing a dildo, a fake penis, in a vagina can be quite fulfilling. Some women like to experiment with different lengths and widths. Some enjoy stretching, taking as wide a dildo as possible. Others like a long one that bangs against the back of the vaginal canal. Most prefer moderate dildos. Men, too, can enjoy a dildo in the ass. Surprisingly, many women enjoy a dildo in the ass as much, and sometimes more, than in the pussy.

10. Outdoors: Playing in the bright sun, or in a deep forest near a stream, or any other outdoor location, can be a real turn-on. Feeling the warming sun or a cool breeze where the sun never shines feels freeing. Some people like the exhilaration of risking being seen by unsuspecting passers-by. Of course you’ll want to be careful to avoid actually being caught, since you could upset people or even find yourself in trouble with the law.

Also consider sunburn. It is easy to get burned on skin that’s not used to sun exposure. The top of the breasts, top of the butt, and top of feet are prime targets for sunburn.

11. Clit squeezing: Some, but not all women like having their clits squeezed. This can be done with or without lube. The sensations are quite different when squeezing a dry versus wet clitoris. When dry, the fingers get better traction, and so can be more effective. When wet, the clit is slippery, and the effect of slipping through the fingers can be orgasmic in itself.

12. Putting on a show for friends: Inviting a friend, a couple, or even a group to watch you and your partner have sex is just the ticket for some people, and an absolutely horrible thought for others. You must be sure your psychology and that of your partner is strong enough to handle this. It may be difficult to bring the concept up with the people you’d like to invite, but once you start the conversation, they may have their own ideas, such as a full swinging party, in which, of course, you may, or may not want to participate.

13. Watching urination: If you’ve never urinated for your partner, or your partner has never urinated for you to watch, you may be surprised to discover that eliminating this taboo brings you closer.

14. Shaving: More and more people are doing it. It used to be almost exclusively women, and then only the ones who were performing in porn. Rarely, you’d see an older man who shaved most of his body. As one ages, one starts to feel less pressure from social restrictions, and does more of what one wants. The older men enjoyed being hairless ‘down there.’

Slowly, being hairless in the genital region has become more accepted in the general population with both sexes. Actual shaving leaves a sandpapery layer of stubble. Some people use depilation creams or electrolysis for more complete hair removal. Some depilate only the genital area. Others go full-body.

For men, it has been more of a stigma, although in recent years, a man can go to the gym and more often and see shaved guys in the showers. Men often remove the hair from only around their scrotum areas, leaving a patch above the penis. However, even today, you’ll want to think before removing hair in case your conservative friends may see you in a communal shower.

It is totally OK under all circumstances to trim genital hair. If anyone were to ask, you can simply say it is more sanitary, or reduces sweating.

The shaved look makes the genitals stand out. You’re far more naked when people can see your labia or scrotum in complete detail.

15. Finger in anus: People of all sexes generally like this, although some can’t get past the idea of fecal matter becoming part of the scene. When the rectum is clean, the fecal matter is pretty much non-existent. You might prefer to use a rubber glove.

The glands around the anus secrete a sweet-smelling substance that is actually quite attractive.

Before introducing a finger into your partner’s anus, you might lightly run a fingertip around the anus for a while. That, in itself, is a great sensation. Use lube and press in slowly. A slight twisting motion can help.

Once in, many people like for the finger to be pushed in as far as possible, with the rest of the hand pressing hard against the butt.

When pulling out, be as slow as when you went in. Sudden removal is somewhat shocking, causing the recipient’s eyes to open wide momentarily. When the finger is withdrawn slowly, the recipients usually feel like the finger is very long.

Finger play should generally be avoided with partners who have hemmorrhoids.

Some women can have orgasms strictly from anal finger play.

16. Fisting: The finger in the anus can be extended to two, three, or even more fingers for those who like that sort of thing. For some partners, putting the whole fist in the rectum is possible. It should be built up to slowly. Most people cannot accommodate a full fist the first time they try. A few people have taken it to great lengths, with deep fisting, that straightens out the large intestine. Arms have been inserted past the elbow. Some people like double-fisting the anus.

17. A variation of fisting is vaginal fisting. Like anal fisting, it should be introduced slowly and gently. Women will often have orgasms when the fist is fully inserted. Such a fulfilling orgasm cannot be duplicated any other way. A few women have managed double-fisting. There are two versions: One is the fists of both hands in the vagina. Actually, the hands are usually open, with the fingers of each handing extending fully into the vaginal canal. The other version is concurrent fisting of the anus and vagina.

18. Full bladder: Most of the time, the feeling that you have to pee is counter-productive to enjoyable sexual play. However, if you purposely have a full bladder, it can add new dimensions to sensations. Having an orgasm with a full bladder is another sensation that cannot be duplicated any other way. Of course, having waterproof bedding is a good idea, because the natural result of going too far with a full bladder is losing control.

Some men have experimented with “peegasms,” or “pissgasms.” This is ejaculating while urinating. It is difficult to achieve because the body’s natural action is to tightly shut the urinary sphincters when ejaculating, to prevent retrograde ejaculation into the bladder. However, with a bladder so full that urine occasionally leaks out involuntarily, while edging, stimulation to just short of ejaculation several times, and a very relaxed body so that when orgasm starts, the valves will not need to close, you, too, can have a peegasm.

19. Play doctor: Just like when you were kids, you can play doctor with your partner. This can be done on any level, and any way you’d like. For instance, it can be a simple visual examination of your partner’s genitals. Or, dressed in scrubs, with a stethoscope around your neck, you can use medical terminology, and even medical equipment, while pretending to perform a full examination.

20. Testicle massage: Like so many sexual techniques, some men won’t like this at all, and others will love it. However, with testicle massage, the rift is deeper. Most actually do like a light massage of the scrotum and its contents. But some like a very firm massage of the testicles themselves. You can work up the pressure slowly, finding your man’s limits.

For some men, it is just a pleasure like any kind of massage. Many will get a full erection even without the penis being touched. Some will spontaneously ejaculate.

There are some men who take it as a challenge. They want it to hurt. They want to see how much they can take. Interestingly, the amount of pressure varies considerably. A sensitive man can only take the lightest squeeze. Some of the ‘challenge’ men can be squeezed so tightly that your fingers start to hurt.

The usual approach is to squeeze the testicles between the thumb and first two fingers of each hand. If you wiggle your fingers back and forth a bit, that can nicely enhance the effect.

Sometimes the balls will slip from your grasp like a wet bar of soap. Generally the man will flinch, but it doesn’t really hurt unless the pressure is severe. Some men particularly like the slipping back and forth effect.

Be careful about pressing the upper area behind the testicles. This is where the spermatic cords attach, and is very sensitive in comparison to the rest of the testicle. Otherwise, the balls can take quite a lot of force. They’re not like grapes that can be popped easily. They’re more like chicken gizzards, being very rubbery. However, a man will feel pain way before the balls can be squeezed injuriously hard.

The things you should be careful of are epididimis separation and testicular torsion. Pressing in the wrong places, or pulling the balls hard in a loose sack can be damaging the area where the epididimis attaches to the upper back of the testicle.

Young men are sometimes prone to testicular torsion, a very painful condition in which the ball becomes twisted on the cord, cutting off circulation and requiring immediate surgery to save the testicle. It may be possible to accidentally set that off with extreme testicle massage.

21. Butt slapping: It seems women more than men prefer this, and many of both sexes don’t like it at all. However, for those who enjoy it, it is pretty much universally discovered during adulthood. The person didn’t know he or she liked it, until someone did it. You can try very mild slapping with your partner, and gauging by the reaction, you can slap more and harder or find something else your partner enjoys instead.

22. Tapping the top of the penis: To hold a penis in one hand, and lightly slap down on the tip with the other hand is a delightful surprise for some men. Be careful, however, because many men wouldn’t like it at all.

You can also slap a penis sideways. Be careful about exerting too much force, because sideways slapping can injure a penis. One of the common injuries is corposa cavernosa fracture. Those are the spongy areas that fill with blood to cause an erection. When fractured, the blood leaks out, making a painful internal blob, and requires surgery to repair.

23. Ear sex: Have you ever had your ears kissed and licked? You’ll be surprised how erotic this can be. It is even more exciting to have one’s tongue in an ear nearly as far as it can go, although it is a bit disconcerting if the air is cut off causing pressure changes.

24. How far can I go?: If you’re with someone new, or someone who is shy, or maybe a regular partner who is only half in the mood, you can play the “How far can I go” game. Starting by touching your partner’s back, you say, “Is this OK?” If so, touch lower down the back, and say “How about now?” Continue down your partner’s back, eventually making it to the butt, always asking if it is OK. If you’ve made it that far, you can reach into your partner’s butt crack, eventually touching the anus or scrotum or vagina, assuming you still have permission. Of course there are many alternatives, such as starting with an ankle, and making it up to the genital region.

25. Hide the prize: A woman can put a prize in her vagina, and have her partner retrieve it. The prize should be something small, and without rough edges. A car key in a little plastic bottle would be a good choice. A toaster oven, not so good.

26. Sounding: Sounding is the practice of inserting objects into the urethra. This is not for the feint of heart, and it is not safe. It is included here in case you’re interested, and are willing to take the risks. There are two risks involved with sounding. One is that the lining of the urethra is very fragile, and easily scratched, which can result in surprisingly profuse bleeding. In time, a scratched urethra can heal with an internal scar, blocking passage of fluids and sometimes requiring surgical intervention. The bigger risk is infection. The inside of the urethra is not well-protected against bacteria. An infection that starts in the urethra can quickly migrate to the bladder, kidneys, prostate, and the general bloodstream. Such infections can also be hard to fight.

Now that you know all that, if you’re still interested, the way to play safe is to use only very smooth objects. Pick ones that will not disintegrate in the presence of lube, and then sterilize your sounds before use. Also sterilize the urethral opening, called the “meatus,” your hands, and any surfaces that the sound might contact.

Introduce sounds very slowly. A good rule is to not push at all. Just guide the sound in, and let gravity cause it to fall into the urethra.

The urethra is surprisingly long in men, typically around 14 inches (35 cm). In women, it is less than a couple of inches (5 cm). Several types of sounds are available. The flexible plastic ones are probably best for safety, but sounds made from stainless steel are more common. They are usually purchased in sets of varying diameters ranging from around 3 mm to over 15 mm. Men’s urethras are less flexible than women, and so they’ll probably need to use thinner sounds.

For a man, the feeling of being fucked is unique. Also, having someone else do something that intimate to you can make you feel vulnerable, which is exciting in the right circumstances.

Many people do sounding only part way. A few sound all the way into the bladder. As the sound stretches its way through the first of two sphincters, the donut shaped muscles that act as urinary valves, the feeling is exquisite. It feels somewhat like you need to pee, but different and better. The feeling is repeated as the sound passes through the second sphincter and into the bladder.

Once in the bladder, the sound can be slid in and out a couple of inches (5 cm), and the feeling doesn’t change much. For that reason, ribbed sounds are also available which stimulate the entire length of the urethra.

In a man, there are two major restrictions in diameter. The first is the peehole (meatus) itself, and then, just about a half-inch (12 mm) into the penis, there’s another tight area. If you make it past these, the sound can go all the way to a bend in the urethra. Hold the penis upright and pointing downward if the person is standing, and you can gently push past the bend. This is an important place to be gentle. You can easily damage the urethra at the bend.

Men will often, but not always, lose their erection while sounding. This is natural, and it doesn’t mean the men aren’t enjoying it.

Some people of both sexes like peehole stretching. This is like sounding, but depth is not important. They’re more interested in how much width they can pass through the peehole. Women are better at this than men because their urethras are more flexible.

A few women have stretched their urethras to the point where they can receive their partner’s penis into their bladder.

If you are not extremely careful with sounding, urination can be very painful for a few days afterward. Also, make sure not to introduce foreign substances that can irritate the urethra such as alcohol or shampoo.

27. Nude beach: There are two kinds of clothing-optional, also known as “nude” beaches. Some where the objective is pure nudity, and others where sex play is the norm. The first kind are more common. People go to be free of textiles, to socialize, and to get healthy sun exposure over their entire bodies. At least that’s what they say. Many are actually there to see and be seen. Any sort of sex play at this kind of beach is frowned upon, and in some cases legally restricted. Even having an erection is not a good idea. If an erection happens, the man should lay on a towel, or go at least belly deep into the water until it subsides. Men often jerk off while neck deep in the water. No one can see them, and it relieves their sexual tension.

The other kind of beach varies in the sexual intensity. Each beach has its own standards. At some, you can play in the bushes or on the cliffs near the beach. At others, people will discretely give each other handjobs or blowjobs if they are on a far end of the beach. At a few, people will have all kinds of sex on a blanket right in front of everyone. Typically, a dozen people will surround them and watch while touching themselves or outright masturbating.
If you are an exhibitionist and are at such a beach, being watched like that can be a huge turn-on.

In any case, taking your lover to a nude beach, assuming your lover is on board with it, can be a great aphrodisiac for later. Plus, you get a nice overall tan.

28. Vibrators: Vibrators come in many forms. Typical ones look like dildos and are battery powered. These can be inserted in a vagina or anus, or held against nipples, clits or glans for stimulation.

Many vibrators have settings so that speeds, intensities, and sometimes patterns of speeds and intensities can be varied.

One of the greatest gifts you can give a somewhat recalcitrant partner to spice up your sex life is a vibrator, assuming his or her temperament is right to receive such a gift. The next step, of course, is to offer helping your partner try it out.

A popular kind of vibrator called “Hitachi Wand,” has a cord, and is very powerful. It is a hand-held device with a large bulb on the end. It is powerful enough for back and large muscle therapy, but no doubt used more often for sexual stimulation. Accessories can be had for the Hitachi Wand. A popular one is a sleeve that fits over the penis.

Some vibrators are small enough that they can be inserted into body cavities. Some are so small, they can be inserted into a urethra. These usually have a thin cord that leads to an external controller and battery housing. Once the user is done, the little vibrator can be extracted from within the urethra by pulling on the cord. Remember that anything inserted into a urethra has to be smooth and sterile to avoid injuring the lining of the urethra or setting off an infection.

Another kind of vibrator is bulbous, designed to be inserted into vagina or rectum. It has a long stem so that it can be pulled back out. Commonly called a “Lush” or “OhMiBod,” These are controlled through a USB interface. The cool thing is that the recipient may not be the one controlling the vibrations. The partner can control the vibrator, or even someone across the Internet.

29. Internet: And speaking of the Internet, many people, especially those with an exhibitionist tendency, like to broadcast their sexual activities. You can start up your cam, and be seen by anyone in the world who so wishes for free at many websites. Two of the popular ones are Cam4.com, and Chaturbate.com. Another option is to video chat with one or more specific people using Skype or other services.

With some of these services, you can make money for going online and showing your sexual activity. The money usually isn’t great, so you’ll see a good many ‘performers’ from third-world countries, where the small amount they earn goes farther.

The most successful performers may not be the prettiest or youngest ones. They are the ones who show the most personality, or manage to make a show out of what they are doing. Sometimes, extreme sexual acts brings a larger audience. Threesomes are common. Quite possibly each member of a group will make more money than they could individually.

You might enjoy Omegle.com or ChatRoulette.com, in which people click a button to see random people. If you don’t like what you see, click to see someone else. If they don’t like you, they’ll click away. Every now and then, a random pair of people stay connected and have a good time.

The degree of implicitness varies as much as the people. Some will simply tease, staying clothed the whole time they are online. Others will do extremely masturbatory or sexual things. For instance there are two women who frequently appear. One ties the other up and ‘tortures’ her friend with an assortment of vibrators.

If you’d rather have a more permanent record of your activities, you can publish an MP4 video on many sites such as XHamster.com and XTube.com. If you do something people want to see, literally tens of thousands of people will see you being naked and sexual. If you like showing, that’s got to be good news!

30. Write about it: For your author, it is a turn-on to write about sexual acts. You can write anything from an R-rated love story to an XXX bondage scene. It is easy to publish your stories on SoloTouch.com if they involve masturbation. If your stories tend toward the bisexual or gay side, check out Nifty.org.

31. You may not be a writer, and you may not like hard-core porn. Sometimes, too much ordinary porn becomes boring. Sometimes going back to the softer stuff actually has a good effect. For instance, your author often enjoys seeing women in very short shorts, or G-strings in which the outer portion of the anus is visible. That’s just me. You probably have your own tastes.

What you may find more interesting than porn photos or videos is stories. Check out the stuff at the above-mentioned sites. You can become incredibly charged up reading the stuff at sites such as SoloTouch.com or Literotica.com.

32. Testicle slapping: This is not for everyone, but most men will enjoy a very light slapping of the testicles. Some men want it very intense. The balls can cause pain, but it takes considerable force to injure them. On the gentler end, light slapping is stimulating and of course pain-free. Try mixing in a light slap every now and then with blowjobs, handjobs, and such activities.

33. Vagina slapping: If you hit too hard, your recipient will be in too much pain, so work up slowly. Notice, too, that some women won’t care for this practice. Sometimes, for a willing recipient, and occasional slap mixed with other activities is the ticket. For others, a long series of continuous light taps is exciting. A few women, but not many, like breast slapping as well.

34. Super Glue: This stuff, under various brand names, can be tricky. It is possible to make a mess that requires a trip to the emergency room. The typical situation is gluing one’s fingers to each other or to an object. People often forget and touch their faces with glue on their fingers, leading to an embarrassing situation. So, with that in mind, be awfully careful about gluing your hands to your genitals. Imagine having to drive to the hospital in that situation.

If you want to play with Super Glue, the trick is to have acetone on hand. This chemical dissolves the glue. It is commonly found in nail polish remover.

Most of the time, when you use small amounts of super glue on genitals, it can be peeled off fairly easily. You might try gluing inner labia together, or you might like to stick sections of the scrotum together, or to the inner thighs. More experimental users may want to glue shut their meatus (peeholes). Proceed carefully, with safe little tests, just in case you could manage to get the perfect seal, and end up with something glued that you cannot unglue. See urethra blocking, below.

35. Urethra blocking: A man can ejaculate with a blocked urethra, but it can be painful. The spasms generally last longer, which is interesting, but the pressure against the end of the urethra, just before the meatus, if that’s where it is blocked, can sting.

Blocking urine flow can be dangerous because the urinary organs, especially the urethra, have a built-in instinctual tendency to push very hard to overcome a blockage. This is probably so that people with bladder stones will survive, and not die of a plugged urethra. But, the pressure may cause kidney problems, or at minimum, it can be surprisingly painful.

You can safely play with the effect, just to experience the involuntary contractions, by manually blocking urine flow. A woman can plug her finger into her meatus. A man can squeeze the end of the penis shut. This is best done just before starting to urinate, or after the flow has started. At first, it may not seem like much, but just keep holding it, and find out what happens! For health reasons, don’t go too far with this.

Be prepared to make a mess, because when you finally let go, the built up pressure and volume will spray a large quantity of urine a long distance.

36. Not orgasming: Playing with the idea of not having orgasms is often called “Tantric” in America and European countries. This is confused with a whole school of spiritual meditation originating in India. We have taken what we think is the best part, and left the rest. And that best part, is the idea of not orgasming. This has an interesting effect. If you have a sexual session, but have not orgasmed, and if you can manage to leave satisfied, you are charged up for the rest of the day if not longer. You may continue to feel horny, or maybe that will settle down. But you also feel invigorated, as if you have more strength, the air is crisper, colors are brighter, and you are more enthusiastic overall. The difference is slight, but it is noticeable.

Practitioners of ‘tantric’ sex can go days without orgasming. It is probably more dramatic for men than women, because for men, orgasm is a large physiological response including ejaculation. You would think that without ejaculating, you’d get clogged up or something, but that tends not to be the case. Your body knows what it is doing, and simply reabsorbs unused sperm and semen. If you really do need a release, and continue to deny it, you’ll ejaculate at night in what’s known as a ‘nocturnal ejaculation’ or ‘wet dream.’

37. Edging: The practice of edging goes hand-in-hand with tantric sex, or tantric masturbation. Edging is coming as close to orgasm as you can, stopping until the urge subsides, and continuing.

38. Mini-ejaculations: Well-practiced male edgers can sometimes bring themselves to mini-ejaculations, without spilling over into a full-blown ejaculation. They’ll have dry orgasms or release a single drop of cum, stay hard, and be able to do it again and again. The best way to get there is to bring yourself close to orgasm many times, then stop. But the trick is to then start up right away again, before the ejaculatory feeling totally subsides. At some point, you’ll feel the contractions of ejaculation, but nothing, or very little, comes out. It helps to stay as relaxed as possible. Don’t scrunch up all your muscles trying to resist. Instead, just see if you can let your body be super-calm, and loosen the muscles that would normally be involved in ejaculation.

39. Continuous orgasms: Another version, is continuous orgasm. Both men and women can practice this, but like edging, it is less profound in women. Bring yourself to the edge of orgasm then stop a few times, like ordinary edging. But instead of waiting, resume after only a few seconds. In time, evolve it to continuing stimulation, but very light stimulation. With practice, you can learn to control the muscles that cause the ejaculatory contractions in such a way that they still spasm, but nothing comes out. In time, you’ll feel yourself in orgasm, and be able to stay there, sometimes for minutes at a time.

This a good technique for solo sex, and once mastered, is great for a man to practice when within a woman.

40. G-spot stimulation: The G-spot is inside the vagina, along the front wall, about 2 inches (5 cm) from the opening. With your female partner laying on her back, you can insert two fingers with your palm facing upward. Rub them gently against the upper wall of the vagina until she has a crashing orgasm. The orgasm feels different, more in the belly, and perhaps more throughout the body, than a clitoral orgasm.

You may have trouble finding the exact spot. It will feel a bit spongier than the surrounding area. Practice makes perfect, and most women won’t mind practicing at all.

This can also be done to women in other positions. A good one is for the recipient to be on her hands and knees with her butt in the air. The practitioner inserts one or two fingers, with the palm facing downward, and pressing against the lower wall of the vagina.

41. A-spot stimulation: The A-spot is less well-known than the G-spot. In men and women, it is found about two inches inside the rectum on the anterior, or front wall. In a woman, it can induce an orgasm which at times is more spectacular than an ordinary orgasm. In men, it is a pressure against the prostate gland.

42. Prostate massage: The prostate gland manufactures and stores semen, the primary component of cum or ejaculate. The prostate is a walnut-sized area just about one full finger’s length into the rectum.

When pressed, it renders a nice feeling, as if one has to pee, but better. Continued pressure can cause some semen to travel through the urethra and out the penis. It is not an ejaculation, but rather fluid being expressed manually. It doesn’t feel orgasmic, but it does feel nice. The man can often feel the drips of semen working their way up and out of the urethra, which is a unique sensation. To enhance the effect, one can massage the prostate with one or two fingers. Some people like to use rubber gloves. A liberal amount of lubrication on the finger is a good idea. A partner may be reluctant to offer this treatment, because anything having to do with shit can be yuckky, but if willing, your partner will be very grateful.

43. CFNM: This stands for Clothed Female, Naked Male. Another version is CMNM, Clothed Male, Naked Male. Any scenario in which the man is without clothing in the presence of others who are clothed can be exhilarating for men. This can range from having female reporters in a men’s locker room, to a group of women restraining a man and performing sexual acts.

Depending on your situation, the following idea may seem great, or absolutely terrible: Arrange to have your man unclothed, perhaps seemingly by accident, in the presence of yourself and your sister.

44. Speculum play: The speculum is a device for prying open an opening of the body to see what’s inside. Speculums are frequently used by gynecologists to examine women’s genitals. They can be purchased on eBay and elsewhere. Professional ones are often made of stainless steel, but low-cost clear plastic ones are readily available.

The obvious use would be to open your partner’s vagina in a pretend exam. Leaving the speculum in place, one can explore the vagina in detail. It is excruciatingly enjoyable to experience an orgasm with the speculum in place. Be careful about pinching nearby areas or pressing sharp edges against her anatomy, as that would certainly take the fun out. Most specula have mechanisms to hold them open. Some women like to have the speculum slowly spread further and further, stretching the vaginal opening.

Many people of both sexes can enjoy a speculum applied in their anus as well, spreading it open and taking a good look inside.

Sometimes fluids can be introduced. Some people will pee in their partner’s speculum-spread opening. Others will introduce cold water on a hot day, or warm water on a cold day. Be careful about extreme temperatures. These parts of the body are quite temperature-sensitive.

A small medical speculum for examining nostrils is available. This can be used to spread open the peehole.

45. Cervical play: You can play with a woman’s cervix. That’s the volcano-shaped opening into the uterus, and is found at the back of the vaginal cavity. The hole itself in the cervix has the strange anatomical name of “os.” Sounds, pens, and Q-tips can be inserted into the cervix. However, with many women, it has an adverse effect. It can bring on a sudden ache. Be careful about leaving anything within the uterus or introducing bacteria. A serious toxic reaction can develop.

46. Feathers: Run a feather very lightly over any part of your partner, for a nice reaction. It can tickle, but in the right places, with the right light strokes, it can instantly induce erection of penis, nipples or clitoris. Elsewhere, it is simply a very sexy feeling. Some places to try are the soles of the feet, the tops of the feet, the inner thighs, the buttocks, the top of the buttcrack, the armpits, the nipples of both men and women, the neck, the forehead, the chin, the neck, the back, and of course the genitals.

47. Food insertions: Consider sticking cucumbers, carrots, and other firm fruit into your partner’s orifices. Sometimes, after a period of time to get used to a skinny fruit or vegetable, the recipient starts to crave more. For instance, starting with a thin zucchini, you might build up to a fairly large one, to the mutual joy of both parties. A caution with food play is to avoid pushing anything all the way in that may not easily come back out.

48. Frenulum pull: There is a little fold or crease of skin on the underside of the penis just behind the glans. This is called the “frenulum.” The term frenulum can also be applied to the little bit of tissue under the middle of the tongue, and the connection between the middle of the inside of the upper lip, and upper gum.

Those other frenuluae don’t have much effect in sex play, but grabbing your partner’s penile frenulum and stretching a bit can be surprisingly delightful. It is best done dry because with any sort of lube, getting a good grip is difficult. For best results, pinch it firmly, being careful not to have it fold over itself which would be painful, and being careful to avoid fingernails. Lift up the penis by the frenulum, and pivot it forward against its natural resistance a little bit. If that isn’t sufficient, you can also stroke the frenulum up and down as you hold a pinch of it between your thumb and the side of your first finger. Many partners will orgasm just from this.

49. Hand-free orgasm: Bring your partner to the brink of orgasm, then let go, as the orgasm hits. The partner may be excitingly frustrated by this, and so it is often called “ruined orgasm.” Interestingly, whereas men usually need a refractory period after ejaculating, sometimes they can stay hard and cum again after a ruined orgasm.

50. Nipples: Your author may be singing to the choir here, but if you’ve never kissed or sucked on nipples, it’s something you need to try. They seem directly connected to the genitals in both males and females. Yes, some women are surprised to learn that male nipples are usually an erogenous zone. You can start with the lightest tickling of nipples, running your fingers around and over the bump in the middle of each nipple. Then kiss in the same way, running your tongue over the whole area. Some people like considerable pressure, by squeezing the nipples with fingertips, clamps, or teeth. Light nibbling on nipples is remarkably delightful to some recipients. However, some hate it!

51. Needle play: This is usually assumed to be a risky behavior in which needles are actually punctured through your partner’s body. Most people wouldn’t care for that, but a few love it. It can be extended further to piercings, which are jewelry worn in permanent punctures.

A much milder form of needle play does not involve puncturing and is not at all dangerous. Instead, use a needle to very lightly stroke or poke your partner in just the right places. The sensation can range anywhere from a tickle, to light stinging. Good places for light needle play are the top of the ass crack, the glans (tip of the penis), the nipples, the outer and inner labia, the exterior of the anus, and the clitoris. Needle play may be fun on the back of your partner’s hands, shoulders, buttocks and elsewhere, as well.

For this kind of play, sewing needles are just right. Medical needles are designed to puncture skin. Sewing needles are designed to not puncture skin. You’d have to press much harder with a sewing needle to penetrate the skin.

52. Enema: You may think of an enema as a strictly medical procedure. It can be enjoyed under the right circumstances. Generally, you want to use a non-toxic material, warmed to near body temperature. However, on a cold day, it might be nice to be just a bit warmer than body temperature, and on a warm day, it can be moderately colder. The rectum is sensitive to radical temperature changes, so use caution. Forcing your partner to hold a large enema for as long as possible can be fun. Be prepared for a mess. Many people who play with enemas combine it with medical play (“playing doctor”).

53. Bladder washing: While completely not recommended, some people play with bladder enemas in which fluid is introduced into the bladder. Not only can this cause toxic reactions, and risk damaging the ureters and kidneys, it can also instigate a nasty infection.

54. Catheter play: The usual way to do a bladder washing is with a catheter. This is a long flexible tube that is introduced through the urethra all the way into the bladder. It is an extension of a practice discussed earlier known as ‘sounding.’ Catheter play is usually done in one direction only – to empty the bladder, not fill it.

Catheter play must be sterile. It is easy to introduce an infection that’s hard to fight. Use lots of lube, and introduce the catheter slowly.

You can’t buy a catheter in a typical drug store. The best bet is to get them online. Resist the urge to use aquarium tubing or anything that seems like it might work. It can scratch the urethral lining, or introduce bacteria. For best results, use a new catheter that’s been stored in its sterile packaging.

Most catheters are ‘retention catetheters.’ They are complex double tubes. One carries urine out of the bladder, but the other is an air or liquid channel. After the catheter is inserted, a syringe is inserted in a plug on the outside end, and saline is squirted in, filling the tip of the catheter, which expands like a balloon. Now, the catheter won’t slip back out of the bladder.

As the catheter passes through the urethra, the feeling is unique. Men especially enjoy the sensation, because their urethras are much longer at around 14 inches (35 cm). Stinging is common if the lube is insufficient, or if the catheter is introduced too quickly. As the catheter passes through the urinary sphincters, it gives one a delicious feeling similar to the need to urinate, but somehow more exciting.

Many recipients who receive catheters report that they like the vulnerability of having something shoved deep into them by someone else. Furthermore, their ability to control when they urinate is taken away. Instead, they get to pee or not, based on when the person in charge opens or closes the outside end of the tube.

Catheters should be removed as slowly as they are installed.

Expect a stinging sensation upon urination for the next couple of days. The body adapts, so if one does catheter play often, the stinging sensation disappears entirely.

You may have been catheterized in a hospital. It probably stung going in, coming out, and afterward. That’s because the practitioner in charge didn’t take the time to do it gently.

55. Quickie: If you haven’t had a reason to have very rapid intercourse recently, you may want to play with a quickie. Find out how fast you and your partner can achieve satisfaction.

56. Bondage: There are two versions of bondage that might interest you. The more typical one is simply tying your mate to a bed, or a chair, so that the person cannot escape your ministrations. Like so many sexual techniques, your partner may like, or hate this. For most of those who like it, the vulnerability excites them.

Make sure to establish a safeword. That’s a word your victim, I mean partner, can say that will cause you to stop. This can avoid injury and even potential psychological damage.

The other form of bondage is genital tying. If done loosely, more ceremonial than physical, it is harmless, and yet can carry a nice sexual charge. The breasts, nipples, clitoris, inner labia, penis and testicles can also be bound so tightly that circulation is cut off.

Whereas it is interesting to see breasts or testicles turn blue due to lack of circulation, this is dangerous and should only be practiced for short periods of time by people who have studied all the potential repercussions. For instance, using a string or cord that’s too thin can cause damage to internal organs. A common problem that’s not deadly, but still may call for medical attention, is that cysts will develop on the spermatic cords.

If you must experiment with genital bondage, it is better to use silk scarves or large diameter soft ropes, and tie only lightly.

An interesting effect can be had by tightly binding the penis while it is soft. If the penis is tied half-way along its length, the bottom half can become erect, and the top will stay flaccid. With the binding as close to the scrotum as possible, the entire external penis will stay soft. It can still be stimulated to orgasm even thought it will stay entirely soft, which is interesting. The ejaculation will be blocked, which may be a bit painful.

Binding the clitoris until it turns blue, then releasing it can result in an interesting pins and needles tickle for a short while.

Tying testicles so they are more accessible for manipulation is fun for those who like more intensity, but they are more prone to injury. Testicles are designed to be loose in the scrotum, so they will simply move out of harm’s way when hit or squeezed. To bind them eliminates this protection.

57. Ballbusting: This practice can range from ceremonial and light, to very intense, depending on the desires of the recipient. Ballbusting can mean hitting or kicking the testicles, or squeezing by hand or with a device, such as a testicle vise. A testicle vise is commonly made out of clear plastic plates with a cutout for the penis. The plates are clamped around the testicles, and drawn close together with bolts and wingnuts.

Testicles are tough, but there are limits, so studying up on the safety of this practice is recommended.

58. Strip poker: This is a game that can be played with two or more people. Actually, it can be a solosexual activity as well. The idea is that the loser of each hand loses an article of clothing. Once a person has lost everything, and then loses another hand, the others can issue requests. Exactly how those requests are dealt with is up to the players, with a decision being made in advance. For instance, a person might have three passes – meaning the person can turn down any three requests, and the play passes to the next hand.

To speed things up, you can play strip blackjack instead, or simply draw cards, with the person holding the lowest card having to remove an item of clothing.

59. Post-orgasm torture: This is generally a technique for males, since for most women, it has little effect. For a man, however, it can be excitingly grueling. After a man ejaculates, his penis will usually become so sensitive that any further touching is just terrible. It feels something like an awful tickle. For the adventurous man, it can be fun to continue genital stimulation after ejaculation for as long as he can stand it. Occasionally, the man will respond by staying hard, or getting soft, then hardening again, and can have another ejaculation a few minutes later. More often, the pleasure disappears, and the man will want you to stop.

For a typical man interested in post-orgasm torture, he’ll want to try it every time. Before he cums, he is excited by the idea. After he comes, reality sets in, and he can’t stand it.

60. BDSM: This stands for Bondage and SadoMasochism, or Bondage, Domination and SadoMasochism. Bondage speaks for itself. Sado masochism is a combination of sadism, in which you inflict pain, and masochism, in which people wants pain inflicted on themselves.

In most cases BDSM is entirely ceremonial. Most people don’t actually want to hurt someone or be hurt. But we like to play with the edges. A little pain, and enjoyable in some way, as long as it is safe, can be OK.

The brain is a funny thing. Evidently, the areas that register pain, and those that relate to sex are adjacent, and as such, we can get our signals crossed. It is a natural thing, but still, rather weird.

BDSM is whatever the participants want it to be. It can involve bondage, spanking, name-calling, tickling or even pinching and punching. For some, the fear of being hurt adds to the excitement.

Most often, in BDSM, you have tops and bottoms. A person will usually be one or the other. Originally, ‘top’ meant the person who pushed a penis into the other person, the ‘bottom,’ In modern times, ‘top’ has come to mean a person who administers any of a wide variety of techniques, and the ‘bottom’ is the recipient.

Another, mostly interchangeable set of terms is ‘dominatrix’ or ‘dom,’ as the top, and ‘sub’ as the bottom.

Some couples will continue their play outside the bedroom, even going so far as to have the top dominate the bottom while at parties, shopping, or just walking down the street.

61. Scenarios: Your partner may be very interested in acting out scenarios. Themes that are based on the same general idea every time are more common than acting out entirely different scenes each time. Common themes that people enjoy playing out are parent-child, medical situations, and authority, such as one person being a jailer and the other being a prisoner.

62. Cosplay: This means “costume play.” Some people are greatly excited by dressing up in clothes that enhance their sexual interest. One or both members of a couple may want to dress up as a nurse, jailer, teacher, slut, or in leather.

‘Leather’ is a big part of cosplay for some. Many accessories, generally made from leather, and almost always black in color are available at sex shops. Restraints, leashes, hats, jackets, pants, and all sorts of smaller items, such as whips can be had.

‘Leather,’ or ‘leather scene,’ has taken on a meaning of its own, often referring nebulously to BDSM in general, the practitioners of BDSM, and especially when leather articles are worn or used.

Sometimes couples will take cosplay out of the bedroom, attending street fairs, or just going out in public in costume. For instance, you might see a leather-clad dom controlling her sub with a leash at a LGBTQ street fair.

63. Three-ways: This is as it sounds, sex with three people. Generally it means two of one sex, and one of the other. It can also be three of the same sex. It is dangerous for relationships. The two-against-one dynamic can rear its ugly head, and unexpected jealousies can develop.

If your psychology is stable enough to experiment with three-ways, interesting opportunities come about. For instance, one person can experience a four-hand massage. A person can accept double-penetration, which usually means a woman will have a penis in her vagina while entertaining another one at the same time in her butt.

64. Electro-stimulation: also known as estim. This is the application of electrical current to a person’s body. The most common option is a device known as a TENS unit, which stands for Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation. Originally used for pain relief, it has been extended into sexual play.

People with chronic back or muscle pain apply electrically conductive pads to their skin in the vicinity of the pain, attach wires, and send electricity through the skin from one pad to the other originating from the TENS unit. The pain can magically vanish. The TENS unit has controls to vary the intensity and frequency of the electricity. Some also control patterns of varying frequencies and intensities.

When the TENS apparatus is applied to the genitals, interesting new sensations and spectacular orgasms can result.

Common applications including putting pads on the outer labia, on the top and bottom or either side of the penis, or across the buttocks. Less frequently, currents are sent across the thighs, breasts or testicles. One must be careful to avoid sending an electrical current across the head or heart. Death could occur.

Most people experienced with estim prefer subtle application. It isn’t supposed to hurt, but can if the intensity is turned up too far. Sometimes, it is so subtle that additional stimulation is added, such as a handjob while the current is being applied.

The pads and connections should be secure, since a bad connection can sting or burn, or suddenly breaking a connection can feel literally shocking.

In addition to pads, other attachments are available, such as a wire that wraps around the penis just behind the glans, or anal and urethral probes or plugs.

Hands-free orgasms are quite common with electrical stimulation.

Some people make their own current generators. Applying the current usually sent to audio speakers directly to a person’s body can be interesting as the music literally moves you. If making your own equipment, you need to be careful to limit the amount of power being applied, especially the voltage.

65. Anal intercourse: This is a mainstay for most gay couples, but those heterosexual couples who start to play with it often find they’ve been missing out. Many women orgasm more easily, and more intensely from anal intercourse than conventional intercourse.

For new practitioners, going very slowly is important. Having a hard penis suddenly shoved in your ass could otherwise be painful. It is best to start with a lot of lube, and introduce a single finger into the recipient’s anus. Then add a second finger.

When it is time to apply the penis, go very slowly, and be prepared to stop, wait a while, or even until another day, until the recipient is ready.

Most people use rubbers. Even a long-time couple who are disease-free may prefer a condom to prevent icky material getting on the man’s penis.

If there is any risk at all of disease, a condom is required. Even that can’t be trusted fully. They sometimes break or come off in the recipient’s rectum. Anal sex is the number one way AIDS is transmitted in sex.

A stiff penis is required. Anal penetration is nearly impossible if the penis isn’t fully ready.

66. Lubes: Some people do all their sexual play without any lubrication other than natural body secretions. Everyone else uses various lubes, lotions or oils. You might get a kick out of trying different materials to experiment with different viscosities, thicknesses, and other characteristics. Different odors can make a huge different. You might like something minty, or something yummy, like coconut oil. Of course, anything you play with should be non-toxic.

67. Tickling: Like so many of these techniques, tickling can be loved or hated by your partner. Very light tickling anywhere on the body can be sexually stimulating. Tickling on the genitals can be exquisite. You can experiment with any form you both enjoy, such as tickling the soles of the feet, tying the recipient to the bed, running your fingers lightly over your partner’s back while fucking him or her doggy style, or tickling the scrotum or outer labia with a feather.

One surprising yet very enjoyable tickle when just starting sexual play can be done with a single sheet of toilet paper. Dangle the corner over, but not quite touching your partner’s genitals. Slowly lower it while waving it back and forth, until it is just touching. The best places to do this are on the outer labia, scrotum, or best of all the frenulum. That’s the little fold of skin on the underside of the penis just below the glans. Tickling this part of a flaccid penis will almost always result in a full erection within a minute.

68. Cold hands: Almost everyone will tell you that being touched with cold hands is miserable. The exception can be on the scrotum, in the ass crack, and sometimes the outer labia. In those places, cold fingers can be delicious.

69. Nudity at home: Make sure the house is warm enough so it will be enjoyable. Then, cook and eat your breakfast, putter around, do the wash, watch some TV, eat lunch, and so on, all without clothes. Seemingly simple, this can be a huge turn-on.

70. Sixty-nine: This refers to a couple laying so that one’s head is near the others genitals, and vice-versa. Each is able to kiss and lick the other. Sometimes this can lead to simultaneous orgasms, but almost always is very enjoyable.

71. Skinny dipping: You may have had times in your youth when you went swimming with friends and suits were not required. This was more common with boys than girls. Later on, perhaps in your college days, you and your friends of both sexes may have gone skinny dipping and it may have been very sexual. What about now? What would happen if you and your mate found a secluded place to take all your clothes off and enjoy a nice swim?

72. Unnecessary hotel room: Having sex in a hotel is a real treat for couples who do not do it often. You may find that renting a hotel room, even if in your own town, is a sexy way to spend a night.

73. Posing for art: Whether or not you or your partner have any artistic talent doesn’t matter. One of you can pose for the other, nude, of course. What’s surprising about this is that the art you or your mate create may be of better quality than you expected.

74. Camping trip: The point of a camping trip isn’t to get out in nature. It’s to get in a nice, cozy sleeping bag together in front of a roaring campfire.

75. Rape play: This, too, isn’t for everyone. Many women, and a few men are fascinated by the concept of rape, and would enjoy play acting a rape scene.

76. Cross-dressing: More men than women enjoy cross-dressing. This is probably because it is relatively OK for women to dress in the same way as men in many settings. A woman can wear blue-jeans, a button-up shirt, even a full suit with a tie, and it’s all OK. A man in a skirt or a dress, is an entirely different matter.

Although most men aren’t into cross-dressing, it is very common, It doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with your guy, unless the same thing is wrong with millions of other men throughout the world. All these guys have all been fascinated by women’s clothing at one time or another. Help him out by setting up a situation in which he can wear a woman’s clothes, and see what it does, and where it leads. If he’s not shy about his fascination, he’ll be so thankful that you let him play.

77. Photoshoot: Take pictures of your partner in erotic settings, and enjoy looking at them every few years.

78. Naked day around the house: Nothing brings a couple together in a sexual way better than spending a day naked around the house. Some Saturday, or a time when you are both off from work, you might plan to spend the whole day without clothes.

79. Peehole examination: When is the last time you looked, really studied your partner’s peehole? This can be very erotic for the recipient.

80. Butt plug: People of all sexes can enjoy butt plugs. They come in many forms. Some are thin and long. Others are quite fat. Some are so wide that the average person can’t use them. You author’s favorite kind are the ones that are self-retaining. They are wide as they go in, then have a narrow neck, and end in a wide handle or base. This kind of butt plug takes time to insert because it stretches the anus very wide, but once in place will stay nicely, keeping the anus partially stretched open. One way to stretch yourself over a but plug is to set it on the floor, and slowly, carefully, sit on it.

People tend to leave butt plugs in place while continuing with other sorts of play. Conventional intercourse while the woman is wearing a butt plug is particularly enjoyable for her, especially when she is orgasming. She can often feel her contractions working against the plug.

The man can also wear a butt plug when having intercourse or even just while masturbating. Men, too, can feel the orgasmic contractions more strongly when a butt plug is in place.

People will often insert a butt plug, pull up their pants, and go about their day while wearing it. This keeps one sexually charged up all day long.

There is a tendency to get used to butt plugs and want to experiment with ever wider ones. One kind accommodates this very nicely. It is inflatable, and comes with an air pump so it will become as wide as you want.

81. Injaculation: Men have experimented with what’s frequently called ‘injaculation’ for millennia. The idea is you block ejaculation, generally by pressing an area of the perineum between the scrotum and anus. Pressing sufficiently to block ejaculation is difficult, and can be slightly painful for the man. When you get the right spot, the semen runs harmlessly backward into his bladder, to be voided next time he urinates. Some medical professionals say injaculation is dangerous, but this author knows of no reported cases of someone suffering consequences.

82. Clothespins: The spring-loaded kind of clothespins can be fun. You can apply one or more to your partners nipples, inner thighs, shoulders, upper arms, and of course the genitals. The bravest of partners will tolerate one or more clothespins on their inner labia, clitoris, frenulum, scrotum or glans. It hurts, but only a little bit. Interestingly, after leaving a clothespin on for a while, it really stings for a moment when it is removed.

83. Saline injection: Another procedure provided for your amusement, but totally not recommended, is saline injection. This sterile medical liquid can be injected into the outer labia, breasts and penis for temporary expansion. The most common place for saline injection is the scrotum. The scrotum can be made surprisingly huge and heavy. Within a few hours, the saline is absorbed by the body. It is a great way to contract an infection that will be hard to fight.

You may find that a few men have injected a small amount of saline directly into their testicles. It is supposedly painful, and of course quite dangerous.

84. Temperature play: Your partner may enjoy having warm or cold water poured on his or her genitals. Of course very hot water is dangerous. A very slow drip of very cold water can be quite exciting on a hot day.

85. Waterpik: Perhaps you have one of those dental contraptions that sprays water in your mouth to clean your teeth and gums. Starting with the lightest setting, and keeping the nozzle a few inches away, try spraying warm water on your friend’s sexual organs or elsewhere. Avoid the temptation to spray water into a peehole, since an infection can be introduced.

86. Hot wax: Light a candle, and drip hot wax from at least a foot away onto your partner. It is ouchy, but not terribly so. Some people really like this. Pouring hot wax on the genitals, especially the clit or scrotum is a given. You may also find it erotic to drip wax on your partner’s back, legs, or stomach.

87. Nibbling: Some people enjoy light nibbling with the front teeth of the inner labia, clitoris, scrotum, and penis. An especially good target is the corona of the penis, the ridge around the back of the glans. Where nibbling seems to work best, and is most often practiced, is on the nipples. There are a few men who like hard nibbling on their nipples.

88. Sucking testicles: Some men like having their testicles sucked into their partner’s mouth, and sometimes massaged with the tongue.

89. Blowjob: You may already be an expert at giving blowjobs, otherwise known as sucking on the penis. If you’re not, the one thing you want to remember is to keep your teeth away from the skin. Most men really enjoy blowjobs. Using a lot of saliva makes it more fun. For those who enjoy doing so, the penis can be sent deep into the throat. With a bit of practice, the gag reflex can be overcome, much to the delight of the man. Literally sucking on the penis has a nice effect, and you’ll find you can build a strong vacuum in the mouth. Another nice effect is running your tongue over the peehole, and even pressing it partially into the peehole. You’ll want to be cautious about getting saliva deep into the urethra, because that could start an inflammation.

Also, avoid the temptation to blow air into the urethra. This can be done, and the urethra will inflate. The air then releases with a raspberry sound, which can be interesting. By pulsing the air as you blow it into the urethra, you can cause the urethra to fill with air all the way down to the bladder. It is even possible to force air into the bladder. The problem with all this is that you can easily introduce bacteria, resulting in an infection that can be hard to overcome. It could even, in rare cases, be fatal.

90. Cockring: Any sort of rubber, plastic, cloth or metal ring can be placed around the base of the penis. Some cockrings are rigid and difficult to apply and remove. Others use Velcro or other means to close around the penis.

A mild application of a cockring can maintain an erection. The veins that return blood to the rest of the body are partially blocked, so the erection cannot easily subside. Binding in this way for more than a short while is dangerous. The blood can clot, and then you have a medical emergency.

Very tight binding can cause the penis to stay flaccid, even during an orgasm, which is quite unusual. However, ejaculation is blocked, which can be painful.

Cockrings can be applied behind or in front of the testicles. Generally, the adjustable or openable kind of cockrings are used behind the testicles, because otherwise a ring has to be quite large to get the testicles to pass through. Just putting the ring on and taking it off can be an erotic experience, if you like testicle manipulation.

A number of unfortunate men have tried using small solid rings, such as wedding bands as cockrings. They apply the ring, the penis erects, and then they can’t get it off, resulting in an embarrassing trip to the hospital, where bolt cutters or even disk grinders have to be used. The man in this situation becomes quite a spectacle in the emergency room, as many personnel feel a need to watch the procedure. Not generally a good day for the patient.

By far the most common use of cockrings is for decoration. They are loose, only lightly encircling the penis. They can have a placebo effect, meaning that just by being conscious of the ring, the man maintains an erection. Cockrings are often seen when exhibitionist men congregate, such as nude beaches, bathhouses or permissive LGBT affairs.

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